Chaos
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Chaos
Hi guys,
well I'm just back from the ER tonight. I slipped and tried to drink - only to find out that right now after these 18 days sober I was tempted to taste a bud of vodka. Literally a couple sips, believe me.
I had an anaphylactic reaction to it. I've never tried to quit alcohol longer that 1-3 days since I was ~28. I am 39 now.
They gave me the usual treatment for extreme allergy... now I'm home.
I guess now I can literally claim "drink or die".
Are those 18 days now all over in my calendar?? I really did not mean this to happen..
Anyway, start over I guess.
well I'm just back from the ER tonight. I slipped and tried to drink - only to find out that right now after these 18 days sober I was tempted to taste a bud of vodka. Literally a couple sips, believe me.
I had an anaphylactic reaction to it. I've never tried to quit alcohol longer that 1-3 days since I was ~28. I am 39 now.
They gave me the usual treatment for extreme allergy... now I'm home.
I guess now I can literally claim "drink or die".
Are those 18 days now all over in my calendar?? I really did not mean this to happen..
Anyway, start over I guess.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Thanks so much, guys. This was weird, beyond my wildest expectations. But I will for sure take the lesson in the physiological sense.
I like to think right now, perhaps it's more than that (=it's also a spiritual sign), but I am not ready to discuss that just now.
Again thanks so much for the responses, it means a lot to me!
I like to think right now, perhaps it's more than that (=it's also a spiritual sign), but I am not ready to discuss that just now.
Again thanks so much for the responses, it means a lot to me!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Yes I know and want to "do it" more than anything else I can come up with in my current reality. This experience does not make me sad, or desperate, or hopeless, or even fearful. I want to be free of substances because they restrict the freedom of the heart and mind, restrict our health, and opportunities. I actually think it's good that I turned out to react so badly to alcohol after my first real serious detox. Perhaps there is no other way for me and I needed this "extra" help Dunno.
Thanks again everyone for responding, I really appreciate it!!
Thanks again everyone for responding, I really appreciate it!!
I'm really glad you're ok too Haennie.
The 18 days of sobriety you had, and all you accomplished, all you changed are still there Haennie
I am a pretty big believer in honesty and resetting the clock to zero tho - it's not about punishment, it's about acknowledging our mistake, acknowledging that we need to redouble our efforts, and then moving on
D
Are those 18 days now all over in my calendar??
I am a pretty big believer in honesty and resetting the clock to zero tho - it's not about punishment, it's about acknowledging our mistake, acknowledging that we need to redouble our efforts, and then moving on
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 10,912
Hello Everyone,
Thanks so much. I actually don't think it was a reaction to alcohol, much more likely to something else, it was a cocktail. Literally just two sips: I went to a restaurant with colleagues yesterday, they wanted to go out to celebrate a recent collaborative achievement. I actually had other plans for the evening and wanted to just stay with them briefly. They ordered cocktails. One of them had vodka in it and the guy who had it knew that I used to "like" vodka but not the extent of it at all, so asked if I wanted to try his drink, surprised I did not order any. Now that was the stupid thing: I felt so confident I could just taste it and not get tempted to drink any more. I think (and the ER docs also said the same) it's most likely I reacted to something else in the cocktail not the alcohol. It was indeed very scary especially as I never had any allergy in my life before, not even mild ones. It would also be scary to be allergic to alcohol especially since I have to use it in my job routinely to sterilize things etc. Don't know how I would get away with such a sensitivity. I called a friend who's a doctor and works in the same hospital this morning and told him the story. He referred me to another doc that specializes in allergies and said this can be tested safely in the office if I want. I definitely will, because I need to know whether it's the alcohol, would have to change a lot of things in my life due to maybe not being able to get in contact with anything with alcohol in it.
Anyhow, life is unpredictable Thanks for the support again!!
Thanks so much. I actually don't think it was a reaction to alcohol, much more likely to something else, it was a cocktail. Literally just two sips: I went to a restaurant with colleagues yesterday, they wanted to go out to celebrate a recent collaborative achievement. I actually had other plans for the evening and wanted to just stay with them briefly. They ordered cocktails. One of them had vodka in it and the guy who had it knew that I used to "like" vodka but not the extent of it at all, so asked if I wanted to try his drink, surprised I did not order any. Now that was the stupid thing: I felt so confident I could just taste it and not get tempted to drink any more. I think (and the ER docs also said the same) it's most likely I reacted to something else in the cocktail not the alcohol. It was indeed very scary especially as I never had any allergy in my life before, not even mild ones. It would also be scary to be allergic to alcohol especially since I have to use it in my job routinely to sterilize things etc. Don't know how I would get away with such a sensitivity. I called a friend who's a doctor and works in the same hospital this morning and told him the story. He referred me to another doc that specializes in allergies and said this can be tested safely in the office if I want. I definitely will, because I need to know whether it's the alcohol, would have to change a lot of things in my life due to maybe not being able to get in contact with anything with alcohol in it.
Anyhow, life is unpredictable Thanks for the support again!!
That does sound bizarre. Glad you're getting it checked out. Obviously, you need to know what would cause such a reaction. That's scary stuff. Hopefully, you'll be able to discover just what it is.
Best,
ODog
Best,
ODog
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