Not Drinking vs. Being Sober
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 23
Not Drinking vs. Being Sober
Just something that occurred to me today. In no way am I suggesting that I've found some kind of solution, or trying to prescribe something to others. Just wanted to share a piece of my personal experience that may or may not resonate with others and may or may not help...
I find viewing my new state as being sober, as opposed to not drinking, is very helpful to me.
It may seem like silly wordplay, but I see a deep difference between the two.
At its extreme, not drinking is an effort, a continuous refusal of alcohol, a dodging of bullets, a hanging on for dear life. Whereas living life sober is simply a state different from my previous one, one in which drinking is just not something I do anymore. There is no need to put blinders on, I can acknowledge its existence and that it's a part of others' lives, but it's very clearly something that is not compatible with me. Things have changed and are different, and I see that I am a person for whom alcohol is simply not the same as for others. There is no need to revisit or further re-examine that question, there has been ample proof in the past, simply believe it the same way I believe the earth is round. The constant vigilance of the not-drinking state is replaced with living life in a way that is compatible with that realization.
Living a sober life is not a continuous struggle, but a joyous exercise in which the parameters are entirely different.
I find the distinction very liberating and empowering. Anyone agree?
I find viewing my new state as being sober, as opposed to not drinking, is very helpful to me.
It may seem like silly wordplay, but I see a deep difference between the two.
At its extreme, not drinking is an effort, a continuous refusal of alcohol, a dodging of bullets, a hanging on for dear life. Whereas living life sober is simply a state different from my previous one, one in which drinking is just not something I do anymore. There is no need to put blinders on, I can acknowledge its existence and that it's a part of others' lives, but it's very clearly something that is not compatible with me. Things have changed and are different, and I see that I am a person for whom alcohol is simply not the same as for others. There is no need to revisit or further re-examine that question, there has been ample proof in the past, simply believe it the same way I believe the earth is round. The constant vigilance of the not-drinking state is replaced with living life in a way that is compatible with that realization.
Living a sober life is not a continuous struggle, but a joyous exercise in which the parameters are entirely different.
I find the distinction very liberating and empowering. Anyone agree?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Yes. I wholly agree. It is a mindset. Sober living is liberating because it involves changing the way you think and feel. Not drinking implies not much change or growth and the continued struggle to not take a drink.
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
I also found that making that distinct difference in perspective was a huge asset to my recovery...no more "poor me, I have to live without drink"..but "Yey me! I can live without drinking...time to get busy!"
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: California
Posts: 50
Totally agree and it's that exact mentality that's helped me a lot this time around - for me it really came down to acceptance and a realization that alcohol is no longer a part of my life. So many other great things in life to be distracted with. Cheers.
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