The frailty of a new box of tissues
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Alabama
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The frailty of a new box of tissues
I just had this epiphany this morning, and I know it's not meant for me alone (they seldom ever will be) - so here goes:
I typically keep a box of tissues on my desk at work (for obvious reasons) - and I ran out of tissues in the box just a couple days ago. One momentary tearful encounter yesterday reminded me that I needed to get a new box for my desk, so this morning I fetched it and put it right on my desk where the previous box had been.
Tearing off the top of the box to reveal the tissues all neatly folded ever so carefully, to allow them to "pop" up with each consecutive use.. I thought to myself, "they're all placed in there so neatly to begin with", and I reached through the plastic to make the first tissue available.
It was funny how I couldn't just get the ONE first tissue, but several tissues all came up when I really only wanted one. It occurred to me then "I've been like that so many times.. like the new tissues. I start out trying to do things just so, or do only the right thing I know to do, but it often gets to be too much too quickly"... and I reminded myself not to jump off the edge so quickly... to take my time, and carefully consider what is best for me.
As luck would have it, a short time later, I sneezed... a big ol' sneeze that made my ears tickle... and so I reached for my tissue, but the next one tore in half, so I had to keep coaxing out the next one carefully to get an entire tissue to come freely out of the box. Again, it occurred to me "I'm like that too, so many times. In recovery we want to see everything work like its supposed to, the faster the better... but if we force it to happen on our own terms, we might get ripped in the process"...
We can all start out neatly enough... with our hopes and dreams lined up in pretty rows, waiting to pop into place at the appropriate times in our future. We can't conceive in the beginning that anything might get bunched up with our plans.
It takes a while for a new box of tissues to dispense like they're designed to... and it takes ripping and snatching a few in the beginning until they start to pop up and flow out of the box easily, without waste or destruction...
It takes us time, too... to let the programs we are working, the programs our loved ones may be working, or simply our acceptance of it all to fall into place. Its only then that things feel like they are beginning to smooth out and work like they're meant to, as we remind ourselves that we are worth our efforts to heal.
I typically keep a box of tissues on my desk at work (for obvious reasons) - and I ran out of tissues in the box just a couple days ago. One momentary tearful encounter yesterday reminded me that I needed to get a new box for my desk, so this morning I fetched it and put it right on my desk where the previous box had been.
Tearing off the top of the box to reveal the tissues all neatly folded ever so carefully, to allow them to "pop" up with each consecutive use.. I thought to myself, "they're all placed in there so neatly to begin with", and I reached through the plastic to make the first tissue available.
It was funny how I couldn't just get the ONE first tissue, but several tissues all came up when I really only wanted one. It occurred to me then "I've been like that so many times.. like the new tissues. I start out trying to do things just so, or do only the right thing I know to do, but it often gets to be too much too quickly"... and I reminded myself not to jump off the edge so quickly... to take my time, and carefully consider what is best for me.
As luck would have it, a short time later, I sneezed... a big ol' sneeze that made my ears tickle... and so I reached for my tissue, but the next one tore in half, so I had to keep coaxing out the next one carefully to get an entire tissue to come freely out of the box. Again, it occurred to me "I'm like that too, so many times. In recovery we want to see everything work like its supposed to, the faster the better... but if we force it to happen on our own terms, we might get ripped in the process"...
We can all start out neatly enough... with our hopes and dreams lined up in pretty rows, waiting to pop into place at the appropriate times in our future. We can't conceive in the beginning that anything might get bunched up with our plans.
It takes a while for a new box of tissues to dispense like they're designed to... and it takes ripping and snatching a few in the beginning until they start to pop up and flow out of the box easily, without waste or destruction...
It takes us time, too... to let the programs we are working, the programs our loved ones may be working, or simply our acceptance of it all to fall into place. Its only then that things feel like they are beginning to smooth out and work like they're meant to, as we remind ourselves that we are worth our efforts to heal.
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