Ncognito13

I've managed to put together different amounts of sober time. Days, weeks, months. What I found was that I wanted to sleep A LOT. 8-10 hours. I guess my body needed the rest. I won't lie, I've been drinking the last few days and last night? Not a single second of sleep. I'm so tired. I have to go to work soon and I'm just laying in bed hoping that I get at least 2 hours of sleep.

Anna

I hope you can stop drinking today.

least

Drinking interferes with normal sleep. Now that I'm sober I have wonderful sleep and wake up feeling good. I hope you can stop drinking and enjoy the benefits of sober living.

Skye2

I'm really sorry to see you're still suffering You seemed to be doing so well yesterday - what happened?
It's good that you're still signing in and I really hope you find peace soon Xx

doggonecarl

Time to ratchet up what you need to do to quit and stay quit. Difficult, since you slammed the door on AA, Rational Recovery is too simplistic. That leaves SR, but despite our support, you drink. Not sure what to tell you. Given your seizure history, I recommend a medically supervised detox and that you give serious thought to impatient care.

You sober journey can start today. Good luck

Skye2

^^^ what he said.

ScottFromWI

I'd agree with Carl, it seems that you are past the point of being able to do this on your own. Your recent history suggests that you've chosen drinking over the very serious health consequences that could potentially end up causing your demise, yet you still drink. You've also given up on several recovery methods without even really trying them.

Is there a local alcohol/drug abuse hotline you can call? If you really want to get better you should really consider some supervised detox/recovery/counseling.

What happens from this point forward is your choice.

Ncognito13

Went out to get food and (stupidly) decided to get a 12 pack. Went home, played COD Ghost online. Had a few, was having a good time. But, as often, the more I drank, the less fun everything seemed. I just ended watching movies on my computer that (sorta lame) make me sentimental. Decided at a certain point to pass out, but could not do it.

Skye2

WHY are you so hell-bent on self-destruct? You've already had seizures pal - and once you start those things, you open the door for more of them, each time you drink.

I agree - I think you seriously need to consider getting some help to quit - rehab would be ideal.

None of us are trying to scare you - if we didn't care, we wouldn't bother posting

You are better than this life you're 'living' at the moment - look at the love you show to that wee guinea pig - it's amazing to see

Why ruin yourself for the sake of pouring a flammable liquid down your throat? You have a whole life ahead of you - live it.

Ncognito13

I'm not opposed to AA, I just don't like it. Mind you I live in central Richmond. There are over 350+ meetings a week. I might go to a few speaker meetings.

ScottFromWI

Do you "like" seizures, insomnia, hangovers, shakes and constant worry about getting drunk?

There are a lot of things that you won't like about getting sober at first, no matter what method you choose. They are far outweighed by the rewards though, no question about.

heath480

I can relate to the no sleeping thing,I couldn't understand how I could never sleep despite the huge amount of Alcohol I was drinking.I know now it was the progression of my Alcoholism.

I hope you decide to get some support and start your sober life.

Wishing you well.

autan

Ncognito13, it seems you do not like AA, this may be because it is designed for people who despite everything in their lives, cannot control their drinking, they are powerless where drinking alcohol is concerned.

The 12 steps are are proven to work. Meetings are designed and administered not by trained professionals, but by fellow recovery alcoholics. It is a fellowship.

Perhaps the content of the meetings is hitting a few home truths, that your not ready to accept at this moment. But you need to take on board the messages.

The longer you continue to drink, the more harm you are doing to your body. You are encouraged to cease drinking, but you are unable to control the urges to drink.

I think, you need to explore the possibility that an online forum as fantastic and supportive as SR clearly is, that you need a more face to face intervention. You need what the AA is providing.

Charlie117926

do what you know you need to do. today is "not too late" but tomorrow may be. seriously incognito, you know what you need to do. start today. now.

sugarbear1

if alcohol is still working for you, you may not be ready to stay stopped

I wish you well

PurpleKnight

Time to bite the bullet, pour whats left of the alcohol in your house out and make TODAY your Day 1!! . . . you can do it, we're all here behind you!!

Skye2

I can't help thinking that 'we' are not enough Purpleknight. Having just read his original post from May last year - I think he needs a lot more than words

Dee74

The sleep thing will settle down - but you need to stop drinking completely and give yourself a week or two ncog.

If you want a different life sooner or later you're gonna have to let go of the bottle, man....make it sooner - it's better that way.

D

Ncognito13

Probably because of sheer exhaustion I finally passed out and got got 3 Glorious hour of sleep. The kind where you wake up having drooled on your pillow because you were out cold (gross, I know). Only woke up because I got a crap in my foot.

I feel much better. I also have not drank today and don't plan on it. At work now. Still a little tired but good. I might just order take out and go home and watch movies.

On a side not TY for the support in this thread. YES, I am aware that drinking is affecting my health and I really need to stop. I'll be 32 this year and at the rate I'm going I might not make it to 40.

EndGameNYC

When I was at that stage, no power in Heaven or on Earth could stop me. Losing everything and near-death experiences brought me in. It doesn't have to be that way for everyone.