Where do I begin....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 4
Where do I begin....
I guess I begin, here with all of you. I am doing this all alone...no one in my world knows my struggles. I am the person, people come to with their problems...I am the one who is suppose to be strong...who has the answers...Im not suppose to be the one struggling....but here I am...reaching out to all of you. I am afraid to hit the submit button, because I will be officially telling someone...I am a mess.....here I go....
Welcome Savedbyfaith!
I'm very new here, but I just wanted to mention that SR has been instrumental in helping me achieve my first full week of sobriety in many, many years.
I, too, was a bit apprehensive about submitting my first post.
Now it's clear that there are only benefits.
I'm very new here, but I just wanted to mention that SR has been instrumental in helping me achieve my first full week of sobriety in many, many years.
I, too, was a bit apprehensive about submitting my first post.
Now it's clear that there are only benefits.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Midwest
Posts: 553
Welcome! Everyone needs people to talk to about their problems!! I'm so glad you joined.
I have found that although I always thought I was the strong one, that I am soooo much stronger when I talk with people about my struggles. Everyone plays different roles with the people in their lives. For some people, I am the one they come to for support and then I turn around and get support from others. You get what you put out
I have found that although I always thought I was the strong one, that I am soooo much stronger when I talk with people about my struggles. Everyone plays different roles with the people in their lives. For some people, I am the one they come to for support and then I turn around and get support from others. You get what you put out
Welcome Savedbyfaith- Just wanted you to know that I understand. I was also the strong one, the one who fixed things, the one who everyone else thought "had it all under control" but I didn't and nobody but I knew. I'm glad you hit submit because this forum will help you realize that you don't have to do this alone.
FYI- the biggest part of my recovery was trying to figure out why I was also the "go to girl" and never allowed myself to ask anyone else for help! Great first step on your part.
FYI- the biggest part of my recovery was trying to figure out why I was also the "go to girl" and never allowed myself to ask anyone else for help! Great first step on your part.
Welcome! you won't be sorry that you posted here. This is such a great site for support. You can write in about what you are going through and people will respond. I can tell you that most people in my life don't really relate to what I am going through but when I post here I get such great feedback from people who get it. I've also read so many stories from this site that I can really relate to. The list of great books is near the top. I have read a few on the list and the books have helped so much as well.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 4
My struggle is with pain medication. I do have chronic pain...I am prescribed pain med and my doc gives me three refills each time I go in. I have been on them for a year now and have built up a tolerance to them...so I began to take more. Then I run out early, but it is so easy for me to get more....truth is...its just easier for me to deal with life, when I take them...not just my pain...but life. And dont we all have so much "life" to deal with. I have refills waiting for me....I HAVE GONE 36 DAYS WITHOUT! It would be so much easier to just have it refilled....the pain....life....
I feel so empty and sad...mad at myself...so many emotions! I really struggled today...I had been up all night, hurting and almost gave in and called. BUT I DIDNT....YAY! I do believe God will see me thru this...I know a day will come that I am able to have the treatment I need so I don't have to live in pain...I just don't want to live on the band aide of pain medication and the clutch it has on me...oh my goodness...IM BABBLING!
I feel so empty and sad...mad at myself...so many emotions! I really struggled today...I had been up all night, hurting and almost gave in and called. BUT I DIDNT....YAY! I do believe God will see me thru this...I know a day will come that I am able to have the treatment I need so I don't have to live in pain...I just don't want to live on the band aide of pain medication and the clutch it has on me...oh my goodness...IM BABBLING!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: na
Posts: 151
You can do it. No one really knows my struggle except the people here. My husband knows but I think he just thinks I drink more than I should here and there. Kids suspect it but are too caught up. I'm only really out here and this board is all i need right now.
savedbyfaith, I'm glad you hit that submit button and are sharing your story and struggles with us. I understand what a huge and difficult step it is for you to reach out for help. You're very courageous in doing so and it shows you really want recovery.
Yeah, I can see your dilemma with the pain medication - you do need it because of your chronic pain but it's also the substance you're struggling with. Have you talked to your doctor about this? Maybe they can come up with alternative medications/pain treatment for you?
It's completely natural for you to be feeling all those emotions after 36 days but the longer we work on our recovery, the more our emotions even out and the better we get at dealing with them and processing them in a healthy way.
I'll be praying for you.
Yeah, I can see your dilemma with the pain medication - you do need it because of your chronic pain but it's also the substance you're struggling with. Have you talked to your doctor about this? Maybe they can come up with alternative medications/pain treatment for you?
It's completely natural for you to be feeling all those emotions after 36 days but the longer we work on our recovery, the more our emotions even out and the better we get at dealing with them and processing them in a healthy way.
I'll be praying for you.
There's a great strength and courage in reaching out for support, to recognise that something needs to change and being able to pull yourself together to be able to try and do something about it takes a lot of guts, so be proud of yourself for!!
You're not the first person to reach out for help and you won't be the last. Many of us come to that point when we just can't live that way anymore.
I'm glad you joined us. You'll find lots of support here.
I'm glad you joined us. You'll find lots of support here.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: McKinlyville, Ca.
Posts: 214
So awesome that you are here. It felt so good when I did that 17 days ago. Now I feel amazing. So glad you have joined. Now I am ready to face my family and friends. My embarrassments have become a strength for me and not a weakness. Or at least I am working on it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: McKinlyville, Ca.
Posts: 214
My struggle is with pain medication. I do have chronic pain...I am prescribed pain med and my doc gives me three refills each time I go in. I have been on them for a year now and have built up a tolerance to them...so I began to take more. Then I run out early, but it is so easy for me to get more....Truth is...its just easier for me to deal with life, when I take them...not just my pain...but life. And don't we all have so much "life" to deal with. I have refills waiting for me....I HAVE GONE 36 DAYS WITHOUT! It would be so much easier to just have it refilled....The pain....Life....
I feel so empty and sad...mad at myself...so many emotions! I really struggled today...I had been up all night, hurting and almost gave in and called. BUT I DIDNT....YAY! I do believe God will see me thru this...I know a day will come that I am able to have the treatment I need so I don't have to live in pain...I just don't want to live on the band aide of pain medication and the clutch it has on me...oh my goodness...IM BABBLING!
I feel so empty and sad...mad at myself...so many emotions! I really struggled today...I had been up all night, hurting and almost gave in and called. BUT I DIDNT....YAY! I do believe God will see me thru this...I know a day will come that I am able to have the treatment I need so I don't have to live in pain...I just don't want to live on the band aide of pain medication and the clutch it has on me...oh my goodness...IM BABBLING!
I dealt with that many years back. I had severe spine damage and in casts and crutches almost a year. Took Norco 10 mg 4 Xs a day for 2 years. I quit and never taken again, but I still think about them to this day. How they make life so much easier. I am now quitting the drinking.
You made it 36 days..wow that means you are in the clear. Your body is way past detox phase. If you have made it this far, why not keep going. The hardest part of quitting any drug is the detox in the beginning. Babble all you want. You will get lots of support.
You will think that you are alone and only you are going through this hardship, other people have it easy right ? Or at least not as bad as you ?
Then, like me, you join a great community like SR and you read things that you thought only happened to you.
For instance, when I was drinking, I used to buy cans of lager and crush them and hide them in the recycling. Only problem was after 2 weeks, there were too many cans to hide, so I switched to bottles, so I could break the glass and you couldnt tell it was a bottle of beer apart from the label, which I used to wash off before throwing away. I would dry the label off and set fire to it in a pestal and mortar.
You would think, (i did), that I invented this particular method of concealing my drinking, until you come on here and read that many people also did exactly or very similar things.
You have found a great website and pick and choose what you want to get out of it to help your recovery.
Welcome to SR
Then, like me, you join a great community like SR and you read things that you thought only happened to you.
For instance, when I was drinking, I used to buy cans of lager and crush them and hide them in the recycling. Only problem was after 2 weeks, there were too many cans to hide, so I switched to bottles, so I could break the glass and you couldnt tell it was a bottle of beer apart from the label, which I used to wash off before throwing away. I would dry the label off and set fire to it in a pestal and mortar.
You would think, (i did), that I invented this particular method of concealing my drinking, until you come on here and read that many people also did exactly or very similar things.
You have found a great website and pick and choose what you want to get out of it to help your recovery.
Welcome to SR
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)