I have fallen back on my progress
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Missouri
Posts: 6
I have fallen back on my progress
I don't know if I can do this.I feel as if I have learned something on how to 'control' my daily desire to have something to drink, and the amount, however I had something to drink last night and the night before
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Missouri
Posts: 6
Well, I want to get where I don't have the 'addiction'. I have felt like I needed to drink to 'ease' my pain. I want to lose weight, so I need to just start that.
I guess bottom line, I don't have a solid plan. Is that my problem?
I guess bottom line, I don't have a solid plan. Is that my problem?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Northern Michigan
Posts: 28,801
I am new here too and am on Day Two in my sobriety. I have doing this a long time though. However you do this, you need to come to the realization that this is no way to live. Anything that can help you is the way to go. This place here is a great start and so is AA. the other things like weight loss, looking better are just added perks. 
Don't be a stranger there are lots of good people with good help and support.
Don't be a stranger there are lots of good people with good help and support.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 52
I believe the addiction is something that will stay with you forever. However, the constant cravings will subside. My first week was horrible with cravings, it was almost all I thought about all day every day. Now headed towards week four and cravings are there, but not near what they were.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by Caryn 
Well, I want to get where I don't have the 'addiction'. I have felt like I needed to drink to 'ease' my pain. I want to lose weight, so I need to just start that.
I guess bottom line, I don't have a solid plan. Is that my problem?
I guess bottom line, I don't have a solid plan. Is that my problem?
What is your goal?
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
What really helped me was to get all of the alcohol out of the house and not buy any more. It's harder to slip that way.
And then, if after doing that, we can't call it a slip, because we had to decide and make an effort etc. Which means it's a choice. It helped clarify things for me.
And then, if after doing that, we can't call it a slip, because we had to decide and make an effort etc. Which means it's a choice. It helped clarify things for me.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Once we decide that we "can't" do something, we immediately discount all options, one or more of which may provide the solution.
I've read all manner of reasons/excuses/rationalizations here as to why people can't go to detox, rehab, counseling, AA, AVRT, RR and all the rest of it, despite the fact that their lives are falling down all around them. These are often nothing more than acts of bad faith since the reality is that we don't know what will work for us unless and until we do it. Making the decision in advance that we cannot or will not "do" any or all of the available options may be viewed as a type of denial, a conflicted desire about getting sober, or simply an unwillingness to heal. Or a combination of any of them.
There is no magic to getting sober. It's not confined to an exclusive few, despite the dismal statistics. Everyone who achieves sobriety is 100% successful, no matter how we get there. It's about taking actions in the service of achieving sobriety. I've learned that the longer we put off being proactive in our recovery, the longer we'll continue to suffer. You see it all the time here from people who seem to know what they need to do in order to get sober, but refuse to do it.
"I can't do it" is a dishonest and deadly assumption that freezes us in time, that continues to take away days, months and years of our very existence. During my three-year relapse, not once did I decide that I can't get sober; I knew that I could and had no interest in doing what it takes. By no act of God, by no intervention from someone else, my time was up. If I didn't stop drinking I would surely die. Either my body would stop functioning, or I'd continue to live a life that was a lie, a life without meaning or purpose, a life in which there were chapters that should never have been written.
For me, life is no longer about ruminating over what happens next, worrying over all the problems I'd brought upon myself, or stressing about what would happen should I fail. Each of those activities works in the service of stifling our taking actions to build a better life. Life now is about doing. All the wonderful thinking and all the wonderful plans I thought I was making got me nowhere. Intelligence and self knowledge only take us so far, whereas perseverance leaves the door open for limitless opportunities to achieve. Being clever is an overvalued trait; taking action is the way out.
I've read all manner of reasons/excuses/rationalizations here as to why people can't go to detox, rehab, counseling, AA, AVRT, RR and all the rest of it, despite the fact that their lives are falling down all around them. These are often nothing more than acts of bad faith since the reality is that we don't know what will work for us unless and until we do it. Making the decision in advance that we cannot or will not "do" any or all of the available options may be viewed as a type of denial, a conflicted desire about getting sober, or simply an unwillingness to heal. Or a combination of any of them.
There is no magic to getting sober. It's not confined to an exclusive few, despite the dismal statistics. Everyone who achieves sobriety is 100% successful, no matter how we get there. It's about taking actions in the service of achieving sobriety. I've learned that the longer we put off being proactive in our recovery, the longer we'll continue to suffer. You see it all the time here from people who seem to know what they need to do in order to get sober, but refuse to do it.
"I can't do it" is a dishonest and deadly assumption that freezes us in time, that continues to take away days, months and years of our very existence. During my three-year relapse, not once did I decide that I can't get sober; I knew that I could and had no interest in doing what it takes. By no act of God, by no intervention from someone else, my time was up. If I didn't stop drinking I would surely die. Either my body would stop functioning, or I'd continue to live a life that was a lie, a life without meaning or purpose, a life in which there were chapters that should never have been written.
For me, life is no longer about ruminating over what happens next, worrying over all the problems I'd brought upon myself, or stressing about what would happen should I fail. Each of those activities works in the service of stifling our taking actions to build a better life. Life now is about doing. All the wonderful thinking and all the wonderful plans I thought I was making got me nowhere. Intelligence and self knowledge only take us so far, whereas perseverance leaves the door open for limitless opportunities to achieve. Being clever is an overvalued trait; taking action is the way out.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: North of England
Posts: 1,442
I think it is hard - harder maybe if one has an off again/on again thing going with quitting, stumbling along drinking one day, not the next, a bit less one day than one used to, nothing the day after..and so it goes on. It is tough to keep up one's determination and focus when doing that. I know I had periods like that in the past. For a lot of people it is an all or nothing situation. Or should I say a nothing or all situation.
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