Kayla50

Made an appointment at a treatment center. I need help so bad.

Skye2

Well done Kayla - that's brilliant

Kayla50

Yes and it scares me to death. I don't know how to live sober.

doggonecarl

Sure you do. You were sober before you started drinking. Keep that in mind. There was a sober Kayla once, and there can be again. The treatment center will provide some coping skills.

You take out of recovery what you put into it. Be well!

Kayla50

I wish it was today. I feel like a am having a true mental breakdown. I feel crazy. The withdrawels hurt so bad.

Skye2

What's happening Kayla? If you feel you're not coping, can you get to a Doctor or ER? Xx

Kayla50

Too shaky to drive. Stayed at home from work today because I'm so emotional and withdrawing. Pretty sure everyone at work is furious I took off another Monday. I can't believe I keep doing this to myself.

Skye2

Is there anyone who could give you a lift? Taxi? I remember those feelings SO well and am grateful you posted as it's helped me to stay on track. But, this is not about me.

When is your appointment at the treatment centre? Can you phone them and tell them how you're feeling and maybe bring it forward? Xx

Kayla50

The 23rd. I'm so scared I'm going to lose my job.

Skye2

I don't know what's happening with your job but I DO know that if you're withdrawing at the moment, you're going to be in panic mode and worry about just about everything

Best way to hang onto your job is to make the biggest effort of your life, to stay off the drink this time.

FreeOwl

you can do it Kayla

Kayla50

My co workers know I have anxiety really bad and they look down on me for that. I hope I haven't taken too many sick days, but I am a wreck.

ClearMind

Just remember that in all likelihood, the reason you are having a mental breakdown is because of the alcohol. Anyone has the ability to live sober - all we have to do is realize we can live a life in which we don't feel the need to consciously put poison into our bodies on a regular basis. It seems like a no brainer course of action, really! Good luck!

FreeOwl

as scary as loss of job prospects can be; the number one priority is your sobriety.

in the long run, all the rest will improve if you confront this and get healthy.

tam2014

Your healing Kayla, thats most important. One thing at a time. You can do this

waterscapes

Kayla: Can you get to a Dr. today? Perhaps a Dr. could put you on a medical leave while you seek treatment. There are laws that protect jobs if you are on a medical leave.

Kayla50

How does that work?

Kayla50

The last time I saw my Dr. she was so judgemental. It was humiliating.

ScottFromWI

Call your local AA hotline. Even if you don't plan on going to AA, they have a wealth of knowlege of detox/treatment centers in your area and can direct you to places that can help now, rather than waiting a week or two. You can take medical leave from your job for alcohol/addiction treatment via Family Medical leave and have the reason for the leave be confidential - definitely something to think about.

EverySngleNight

Kayla, I'm really sorry for how I KNOW you're feeling today. Just remember, one thing at a time, okay? Try to take some deep breaths.

You made a very good choice, setting up the appointment for treatment. Do you have a friend or family member that could drive you to see a doctor? You could get a note, to cover you at work until you enter treatment. They also may want to give you a prescription, to take the edge off and help you out until you're in a safe place.

Once you're in treatment, they should be able to help you sort out your medical leave.

Keep posting. Sending you my best.