dbj4190

It's been a rough past 24 hours dealing with emotions!!! Not only with my own dealing with alcoholism but seeing others (younger generation) suffering from this disease and not knowing if they have a problem or not!

I went to four meetings yesterday and seen several young people all in them because they have court cards! They all kind of sat back and whispered to one another and laugh about stuff and I just wanted to talk to them and tell them my experiences of several years! Tell them to snap out of it or something!!!! I spoke in all meetings but could tell it was going In one ear out the other! I wasn't upset or mad by this I was concerned for them as I saw myself sitting in those chairs over the years and can see em following my footsteps!

One girl about 18-21 has really stuck in my head though! She spoke a little of much but a little is a start but the last thing she said as she cried was "I'm looking for a sponsor" I felt bad for her as in this meeting there was no other women at and I felt do bad! I ended up staying for the next meeting that was 45 minutes later and looked up when I heard the door open and it was her again! She looked so scared as she walked in! Luckily a women chaired this meeting and few others showed and she said again she was looking for a sponsor! I was happy when the meeting got done two of the ladies grabbed and took her to another room to talk to her as she was in tears as she walked by! I just wanted to reach out and give her a friendly hug but I didn't as I knew that this ladies would help her but I couldn't help but feel bad for her and still do today!

Now my sponsor and my counselor both have advised me I can't worry about them or take on the burden of another alcoholic as if I did I could lose site of my sobriety and could possibly relapse!

Does anyone else ever go through this and if so how do you deal with it?

Dbj

doggonecarl

I have no advice to give on this matter, but I did want to say that it sounds like you are a good-hearted person, compassionate. Save some of that compassion for yourself. Early recovery is a roller coaster of emotions. When you are down and beating yourself up, remember to be as compassionate to yourself as you are to the newcomers.

Thepatman

I don't think there is anything wrong with feeling sad for her and showing compassion. I admire that.

As long as it doesn’t jeopardize your sobriety, all feelings are appropriate.

dbj4190

Thanks Doggone Carl,

I know I have to do as you said it's just hard to do at times! Just last week I was asked if I have forgiven my self and my response was had t thought about me as I was wanting to make things right with my family! Was told have to forgive yourself before you can move on!!! Yet still having problems doing that as I've hurt so many and want to make it right!!!

Just need to work on changing how I think and follow my sponsors guide

KateL

I worry about everyone. I sometimes wish I didn't.

FreeOwl

I experience "emotion overload" a lot in sobriety.... as though so much has been stuffed away or deadened or lost or forgotten for my whole life that now with a clear path to be felt, it just wells up and grabs me at random and often to my great surprise.

Even reading your post brought me tears.

anyway... you are obviously a caring person and thanks for sharing.

ImperfectlyMe

You sound like such a gentle soul, I love that. May you never become jaded or desensitized. Some may say you have to toughen up. But I don't there's not enough people who give those friendly hugs you wanted to give. Sometimes those are better then a lifevest! Great post