Zeepa

Hello


I have a quick question that I cant seem to find help for anywhere else.

I'm on day 5 of sobriety, I think this is my fourth or fifth attempt. I can't quite remember how many times I have tried to quit, as the past five years all seem to mix together in one foggy haze. I've been pretty much a daily drinker, drinking at least 5 days a week for the whole five years, with the occasional couple of weeks off here and there. It started at University, where I would usually drink in the morning at 8/9 am until I pass out at midday. Then when I woke up at about 4/5pm I would then go the bars and crawl home at 2am and pass out again. Rinse and repeat for the five years in total I have been at University. I would sober up for 3 or 4 days to get essays and work done by deadlines and somehow passed my degree.

Anyway, I work now (used to take vodka and coke in a pepsi max bottle to get through working days. Havent done that for a while now though)I live with friends at the moment, all of whom drink regularly at home. They drink a couple of days in the week and then from friday until sunday is party time, IE, one long drinking session.

I can't move out right now for financial and work-related reasons. I've asked them a couple of times if they could leave off the drink for just a week or two so i can try and get some footing on this damn drinking problem of mine. They initially agreed to, but come wednesday...poof the refrigerator is full of beer again and there are cans/bottles everywhere in the house.


Lots of you can probably imagine how hard it is to stay sober when you go to the fridge for a can of coke and theres 10 cans of lager in there....or when I go for a shower and there are empty beer cans in the trash can...or if I go to the cupboard for a snack and there's a bottle of brandy or two there.

How can I deal with this? I dont want to be selfish and make three other people stop enjoying themselves on my account. As stated, moving out is just not an option for me right now. I also went to see my doctor and had a blood test done about 6 months ago to see if my liver had turned into a charred pile of ash yet, but thankfully all tests came back normal.

Thanks

Inca

This is a tough situation to be in. Can you have a conversation with your roommates and tell them you're not going to drink for awhile and would appreciate it if they keep their alcohol in a drawer so you don't see it every time you go in the fridge? Seems like a small favor to ask for now.

Also, if you go to meetings and start hanging around sober people, you'll build up a group of friends that you can hang out with without alcohol being in the picture.

Anna

It's not a great situation to be in. Have you tried to find another place to live? That would be the best solution.

If they are drinking can you stay in your room, or go out for awhile and do something else? Try to not be around when they are drinking.

1newcreation

Thats tuf one but as its said, just coz we got sober, doesn't mean every1 changes/stops drinkin. If you're sobriety matters, I would either move or only be there to eat, sleep, shower etc just essentials

Twinings

I know you said moving isn't an option but is there some kinda local program that could help you financially to find somewhere. There is a lot of help out there if you know where to look.

Other than that, how about a mini-fridge in your room and ask your house mates to keep the booze and empties out of sight?

Hope you find a solution

KateL

Yes, lots of good ideas posted. I hope you manage to look after your own needs and put your sobriety first xxx

FreeOwl

are you getting out of there and doing things to support your sobriety as much as you can?

You may not be able to change your circumstances right now, and probably won't change the people around you... so focus on the things you CAN change...

are you going to AA meetings? Do you have a community of non-drinkers around you that you can tap into? Can you visit family a bit? Can you get to a gym or go for a walk / run?? What things can you do to refocus yourself. This world is filled with drinkers and drink - and while it's certainly a real challenge to deal with it so 'in your face' - it's not impossible. If you can't change your situation at the moment, then maybe see if you can change your response to it.

hang in there!!

TucTee

Have you let your roommates know you're trying to quit? If so, that will help to develop a mutual understanding of what you're trying to accomplish for yourself. With that understanding, it's less awkward and therefore less tempting to stop "ostracizing yourself" and have a drink.

As far as getting used to having booze around, the only thing you can do while still respecting your roommates' things is to just ignore the alcohol. Grab whatever you need from the fridge or cupboard and move on.

deeker

AA would be a good place to go on Fri and Sat, good support!

Dee74

I had to change a lot of things in my life - I couldn't be around drinkers for a while.
I hope you can work something out Zeepa

welcome to SR

D