I need help now!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Chino Hills, CA
Posts: 3
I need help now!
Well i am about ready to relapse any minute now. I just cant tell you how hard the month of December has been for me. Getting kicked out of the house, thrown through a glass china cabinet cutting up my back, being rejected by my father. Grades failing and to top it all of on December 31, at 1048 in the morning i get a call from my girlfriend of two years decided that she wants to break up with me. She doesn't tell me why she doesn't tell me anything but that she doesn't want to be romantically involved with me anymore. Well ****, ****, doesn't that suck... okay well now i am contemplating that i should basically relapse its been basically two years since my last drink and i am proud but this **** is all way to damn hard i am done with it all. I don't have anyone to look to anymore. I just want the drink so bad and i swear i am going to mostly take it. I know what comes with me drinking though i am classified as one of those angry drunks i suppose. I got sober doing it cold turkey without the help of any AA help or whatever. Alcohol has taken my best friend Brian from me because about three years ago he was struck by a drunk driver as we were jaywalking across the street he died right in front of me going straight through the windshield. I am 18 years old sure i am young but that doesn't mean anything to me i am ready to just give up roll over and die in a hole or ditch somewhere. i am looking for someone to help me, talk to me or anything i need help i cant do this alone. People here are supposed to be here to help one another and i hope i can get some. But i feel like i only have a few hours until i break or something.
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
I dont have any sensible advice other than you are rightly upset and angry now so maybe delaying the decision to relpase might be an idea.
I found that alcohol relief was only short then i had more problems than before.
I found that alcohol relief was only short then i had more problems than before.
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
We do care. That is a whole mess of problems to hit at once and it does suck. However, drinking will not make any of those problems better or go away. My problems only got worse when I drank, and the more I drank the worse they became.
Many of us here found living sober to be more challenging than getting sober. We found we needed additional support for encouragement and accountability. We needed to learn sober living skills from people who were satisfied living sober.
Keep checking in here and wait 24 hours to see how you feel tomorrow, and then check in again.
Many of us here found living sober to be more challenging than getting sober. We found we needed additional support for encouragement and accountability. We needed to learn sober living skills from people who were satisfied living sober.
Keep checking in here and wait 24 hours to see how you feel tomorrow, and then check in again.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: OZ
Posts: 2,055
Hello flatsoundangel, you have got a lot going on, the last thing you need to do is compound it by drinking. 2 years, that's awesome.
Alcohol isn't the solution for all the stuff happening with you at the moment.
I am here if you want to talk.
Alcohol isn't the solution for all the stuff happening with you at the moment.
I am here if you want to talk.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Newcastle
Posts: 908
Really sorry you're struggling angel. Having all that going on would be a test for the best of us.
I'm sure you know yourself that you will have to deal with it eventually. Drinking wouldn't improve anything and as has been said, would probably make things worse.
I hope you have some other support to get you through this tough time, lean on SR as heavily as you need to.
Stay strong, I know it doesn't feel like it but things will get better with time. Take care, keep us updated
I'm sure you know yourself that you will have to deal with it eventually. Drinking wouldn't improve anything and as has been said, would probably make things worse.
I hope you have some other support to get you through this tough time, lean on SR as heavily as you need to.
Stay strong, I know it doesn't feel like it but things will get better with time. Take care, keep us updated
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Chino Hills, CA
Posts: 3
okay i am just trying to stay calm and everything its like my chest is pounding inside my chest like its about ready to explode and i am scared ******** about everything that's going on . the only thing that comes to mind is to take it and restart the ****** mess i began with. Everyday i have fought with this crap and i try to hold em off but now there too strong for me now i just have no idea where to start or how i am going to do this I WANT THE DRINK so bad i am just worried about if i do if i am going to be caught up in the vicious cycle of an alcoholic people love to display about us which i think is ****** up by the way.
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
I find that a quick burst of intense exercise can help take the edge off the cravings and allow me to experience the strong, uncomfortable feelings in a healthy way. Numbing myself with alcohol has only caused serious problems for me over the years.
Kaleidoscope eyes
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London
Posts: 5,243
Well there is tons of support and advice here so keep posting and try to remain sober or it just gets worse. Can you talk to your doctor about counselling if you don't like AA? There are alternative modes of support and of course posting here has helped many, many people. I do feel for you and it is a shame such a young person has to go through such grief. You sound smart and I can identify with the parent thing, Mine were a pain in the arse and there was much dysfunction but it wasn't my fault and I'm sure it's not yours either. I hope things look up for you soon. Please don't drink, that would be heartbreaking xxxxx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: NJ
Posts: 109
Wow!!! How proud I am of you that at such a young age you were mature enough to realize your issue, handle it and stay sober for two years!!! Please don't drink. I know things seem difficult right now but you are strong, you have proven that. Try and clear your head and give yourself a little time and deal with things one at a time.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Casa Grande, Az
Posts: 31
Take a breath,,,, and know you have support. I too, lost my best friend, he was also hit by a car. The problems that are hitting you right now are temporary. If you take that drink, it will only prolong the way you feel, not help how you feel. You are loved.... take a breath, go for a walk, do some push ups,,,, just try to prolong taking that drink. I feel for you,,, that's a lot of stuff to carry and try to make sense of. You have friends here!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
that stuff all sounds challenging.... really tough stuff to manage and carry on...
But guess what?
You don't have to drink over it.
Get to a meeting. Don't pick up. Just for today. Tomorrow's another choice... but today - don't drink.
You can do it.
But guess what?
You don't have to drink over it.
Get to a meeting. Don't pick up. Just for today. Tomorrow's another choice... but today - don't drink.
You can do it.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I'm really sorry you had a bad December. That all sounds horrible.
The best way not to have a bad January as well is to stay sober.
Drinking won't help - it won't make things any better, it won't help you, and it won't make people think about what they've done or treat you any better.
The really good thing about being sober is we can always build from this point. Things will get better - and you'll have a lot of support here.
I'm glad you've found us - welcome
D
The best way not to have a bad January as well is to stay sober.
Drinking won't help - it won't make things any better, it won't help you, and it won't make people think about what they've done or treat you any better.
The really good thing about being sober is we can always build from this point. Things will get better - and you'll have a lot of support here.
I'm glad you've found us - welcome
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Alcohol isn't going to solve anything, it'll be a short term escape and that's it, and I don't think you want to throw 2 years away to wake up with a hangover tomorrow, it's not worth it!!
Having support is going to get you through, while you try and figure things out, alcohol may seem like the solution, but it's only a temporary numbness!! . . . you can get through this without it!!
Having support is going to get you through, while you try and figure things out, alcohol may seem like the solution, but it's only a temporary numbness!! . . . you can get through this without it!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
Think I'm late on this one.
Ok, first you have to put the problems in individual compartments. School, in one , girlfriend in another. Now try to relax and stop looking at everything at once. See the problems by them self. Make an individual plan to address them also individually. And lastly make a list of what is not f up in your life.
Your health is still there, that's the most important thing.
Specifically to your girlfriend, you will have to read on the phases of grief. Right now your in the anger mode. Perfectly normal.
I'm 39 and have been dropped by girls before and know at the moment it's like ripping your heart out! But today I know they were not met for me and me for them. Some were not good enough for me, some cheated on me.
That's the best advice I can give you friend, be well and don't drink.
Ok, first you have to put the problems in individual compartments. School, in one , girlfriend in another. Now try to relax and stop looking at everything at once. See the problems by them self. Make an individual plan to address them also individually. And lastly make a list of what is not f up in your life.
Your health is still there, that's the most important thing.
Specifically to your girlfriend, you will have to read on the phases of grief. Right now your in the anger mode. Perfectly normal.
I'm 39 and have been dropped by girls before and know at the moment it's like ripping your heart out! But today I know they were not met for me and me for them. Some were not good enough for me, some cheated on me.
That's the best advice I can give you friend, be well and don't drink.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
Flatsoundangel,
I am sorry for all you have been through. Very sad about your best friend. hugs.
I am however, so impressed with your strength and courage, at staying sober for two years, through all of this. It is so tempting to want to numb yourself, I know, with all you are dealing with. But, you are doing it... you came and asked for help, which shows such wisdom and heart.
its hard to go through lifes troubles and pain, and leaning on the support of those who understand is so helpful. that is how it works..you have learned that already.
hang in there, keep doing what you have been doing.. and if you had a group where you could share with others the secret of your success...you have lots to offer, and you could find understanding and friendship.
stay strong, even in the high winds, you can do this.
I am sorry for all you have been through. Very sad about your best friend. hugs.
I am however, so impressed with your strength and courage, at staying sober for two years, through all of this. It is so tempting to want to numb yourself, I know, with all you are dealing with. But, you are doing it... you came and asked for help, which shows such wisdom and heart.
its hard to go through lifes troubles and pain, and leaning on the support of those who understand is so helpful. that is how it works..you have learned that already.
hang in there, keep doing what you have been doing.. and if you had a group where you could share with others the secret of your success...you have lots to offer, and you could find understanding and friendship.
stay strong, even in the high winds, you can do this.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
