Django

Says it in the title really.About 8 days ago,I did a really bad thing and drunk drove.That day my football team (Millwall) was on the tv,we played ****.Anyways I came back and ended up at a pub.I then drove my car back to my house.I went to get in my house and my mum new I had been drinking.

I then went upstairs where my dad came in my room ,and he was sed pissed off me with me.That pissed off he didn't speak to me for a week.(this was the 4th day of a binge when I was completely out for the count depressed,and let's be honest,couldn't put a sentence together.)

So he came in,he knew what was going on.I actually admitted to my mum that I was an alcoholic that night.I was pretty proud of that (but very ashamed).

A week later,I haven't really spoke to my dad.Me and my mum are ok,and to be honest me and my dad after 5 days are back to normalish.my mum then asks do I want to go with my dad to the pub.

So why didn't my mum listen to me?i told her and she ******* knew for a while that I'm an alcoholic.She knows and I know she loves me (this ain't a relationship where she mistreats me she wants the beat from me and I know she has unconditional love for me and so does my dad!!

Denial I'm guessing.Thanks whoever read this it took me a long time to write!!

SlickRick07

Sometimes family members want to believe that there isn't a problem. They prefer "normalcy" rather than confrontation. I deal with it a lot in my family. They would rather brush things aside than have to deal with it.

PurpleKnight

Still with you man!! . . . you can still do this!!

Django

Still with me doing what though mate!!I ****** up big time.I told my mum I'm N alcoholic and yet I get a lift to the pub with my dad????I don't get it mate it's ******* stupid and I could smash someone in the face right now but it's lucky I'm in bed!!!!why!!!!!

PurpleKnight

And what?? . . who cares? . . . the point is I've been there, completely blew my sobriety out of the water, got s**tfaced after making a commitment, so I know how it feels, give me that much!

Here's the thing, you feel like sh*t now, and your gonna feel like sh*t in the morning, but rather than going on another drinking session, realise tomorrow morning is the beginning of another day, you can wipe the slate clean, get sober and start to build a happy life!! . . . I've been there mate, and I know how you feel, right now!!

Why?? . . . because waking up tomorrow is going to hurt more, than being fresh and sober!!

Dee74

There's no point getting angry about it Django - it would be great if everyone's family got it - but they often don't...

my family still asks me if I want a drink...I'm convinced they believe all I needed to do was 'cut back a bit'...

They may not understand, but we do - we know what alcohol does to us. There's support here and in many other places

D

suki44883

Non-alcoholics just don't get it. They can't. Many of them think of alcoholics as dirty homeless people who live under a bridge somewhere drinking wine out of a paper sack. They don't understand that alcoholism crosses all social, educational, and professional classes. Don't be angry with your mum because she doesn't understand. Maybe you can help her understand or at least lead her in that direction?

malcolmsloan

I totally relate to your anger, Django. I don't know if you remember my x-mas day experience (I posted about it), when my in-laws handed my wife and I mimosas the day after we held a sober gathering at our house: They knew/know we have problems. I went outside and texted a friend that I was going to go back in and start shoving mimosas up peoples. . . They truly don't understand.

But we do. Here, you have true empathy. I/we understand your frusration.

Mizzuno

Django, I hear ya!

KateL

Perhaps she doesn't understand fully. My first husband didn't. Don't take it to heart. xx

HeadLump

Treasure the unconditional love, Django, even if it comes with a complete lack of understanding

And good luck to Millwall for this afternoon My team are playing too (Exeter City) but we seem to be in free-fall at the moment so I'm not holding out much hope!

Django

Thanks everyone really appreciate it.You don't realise how long that took to write!I wasn't smashed or anything,but even when I was drinking I new I shouldn't be,even though I saw people I haven't seen in ages and having a good time,I new I shouldn't be drinking.

They don't get it,I get that now.Even after all the **** I've done and how they have been affected by it,they still think just have 1 and your be fine.

At least I chucked the 2 bottles I had down the toilet,otherwise I would of been drinking them now.I hate this thing we have :-(

Oh and head lump,do you still have Jamie cureton upfront?

HeadLump

Well done for chucking those bottles away, Django!

Sadly, Jamie Cureton defected to Cheltenham - even scored a goal against us, I think But he'll probably come back in a year or so. He usually does

zeppodog

Most my family knows I drink too much but still think I can moderate my drinking. I think people don't want to believe how bad things are for a loved one. Good luck on sobriety, keep it up

MIRecovery

I found that I had to own my sobriety. Regardless of what people did do or didn't do I had to take responsibility. Normal drinkers will never understand that and I cannot expect them to. My alcoholism is my problem my problem alone.

I need to reach out to the people that can help and ignore the people that can't.

ForMeForThem

I can relate. My husband knew there was a problem yet he still suggested moderation as the solution, has bought me wine and offered me sips of his beer. I think it's denial, or they just want everything to be ok with us and don't know what to do. When the time is right maybe you could try talking to them about what kind of support you need from them. But they may not get it and then it will be up to you to show them by your actions that you mean it...you can't drink. It's hard - but worth it, hang in there!