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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Kansas
Posts: 7
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HI everyone,
My name is Alli. I am married to an oxy addict. We have been together for 10 years, married for almost 2. We have two children. Grace 6 and Rage 2. I love my husband with all of my heart. He has been addicted to oxycontin for 6 years now. He left rehab 7 months ago and has relapsed several times since then. He attends na and aa meetings, I attend al anon. It has been a rough road so far. Sometimes I feel like I can do this, like I can support him no matter what and sometimes I feel like just giving up and making him leave our home. He runs his fathers business and has A LOT to lose. I know as his wife I need to support him and I know that I need to focus on myself but I feel like this is a never ending battle that will never be won. I hate not being able to trust him and giving him an allowance for the money that he works so hard for. He is a good, kind loving man when he is sober. He is just a total weirdo when he his high. I dont like it. The lying, stealing, manipulating is just too much........Someone please tell me that an opiate addict can recover and stay sober. Thank you
My name is Alli. I am married to an oxy addict. We have been together for 10 years, married for almost 2. We have two children. Grace 6 and Rage 2. I love my husband with all of my heart. He has been addicted to oxycontin for 6 years now. He left rehab 7 months ago and has relapsed several times since then. He attends na and aa meetings, I attend al anon. It has been a rough road so far. Sometimes I feel like I can do this, like I can support him no matter what and sometimes I feel like just giving up and making him leave our home. He runs his fathers business and has A LOT to lose. I know as his wife I need to support him and I know that I need to focus on myself but I feel like this is a never ending battle that will never be won. I hate not being able to trust him and giving him an allowance for the money that he works so hard for. He is a good, kind loving man when he is sober. He is just a total weirdo when he his high. I dont like it. The lying, stealing, manipulating is just too much........Someone please tell me that an opiate addict can recover and stay sober. Thank you
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Hey Alliloooove, welcome to the Forum!! . . . you'll find plenty of support here! 
I'm by no means equipped to speak about opiate addiction, but I'm sure there are a few coming along after me with more advice! . . . I just wanted to say hello!!
I'm by no means equipped to speak about opiate addiction, but I'm sure there are a few coming along after me with more advice! . . . I just wanted to say hello!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Kansas
Posts: 7
LiaAc,
Thank you so much for your message. (I cannot respond until I have 5 posts) Reading and hearing messages like that helps give me hope that I can do this and that my husband can too. He says he wants to get sober but I dont feel like he is doing this for himself. Before he went to rehab he was taking several 80 mg oxy's a day. Not sure of the exact amount but in a three month period he spent around $4,000. I am very careful with our money now. But I know when he starts using again..besides all of the tell tale signs..he starts sneaking my debit card out of my purse and there will be random $20-$60 atm withdrawls. Then when i ask about them he avoids the question. I know relapse is a part of recovery but he will be sober for like a week then use for 3 weeks then do that cycle all over again. I feel like he is using relapse as an excuse to "manage" his use to try to get away with it. The last time he relapsed he didnt reach out at all for help. He sat at his dads house miserably withdrawing during Thanksgiving. I am tired of his family asking me if he is sober or not. Hell if I know!? Ask him not me!!! THank you so much for your message, I cannot tell you how much that means to me. Congrats on your 30 days!
Thank you so much for your message. (I cannot respond until I have 5 posts) Reading and hearing messages like that helps give me hope that I can do this and that my husband can too. He says he wants to get sober but I dont feel like he is doing this for himself. Before he went to rehab he was taking several 80 mg oxy's a day. Not sure of the exact amount but in a three month period he spent around $4,000. I am very careful with our money now. But I know when he starts using again..besides all of the tell tale signs..he starts sneaking my debit card out of my purse and there will be random $20-$60 atm withdrawls. Then when i ask about them he avoids the question. I know relapse is a part of recovery but he will be sober for like a week then use for 3 weeks then do that cycle all over again. I feel like he is using relapse as an excuse to "manage" his use to try to get away with it. The last time he relapsed he didnt reach out at all for help. He sat at his dads house miserably withdrawing during Thanksgiving. I am tired of his family asking me if he is sober or not. Hell if I know!? Ask him not me!!! THank you so much for your message, I cannot tell you how much that means to me. Congrats on your 30 days!
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