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Tackling Issues Head On

Old 12-19-2013, 12:12 PM
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Tackling Issues Head On

So I've not been looking forward to the Christmas period much over the past few weeks. I'm sure many of us (especially those of us intending to spend our first Xmas sober) have some reservations. I've been doing my best to get in to the mood with the tree and decorations etc etc. I'm kinda getting there but not really. I think this festive period will be one to 'survive' and hopefully I'll be able to positively reflect on it after.

There are two particular issues that were bothering me:

1. Spending the 23rd - 27th at my parents where the booze is normally free flowing and I would previously have been more than willing to partake. A weekend away for my Dad's 60th about a month ago showed me that I'm definitely not there yet with being around people drinking when I'm not.

2. A very good friend's wedding on 4th January. The venue is out in the country and there is a bus being laid on there and back. The bus back leaves late, around 12.30pm, and I was a bit nervous about the time and the journey itself.

So my anxious head was fretting about both and two short and easy conversations have made things that little bit easier:

1. I was speaking to my Mum on the phone today. She knows I won't be drinking over the festive period. I said to her just to be clear that I definitely won't be drinking and I'm more than happy with that (they think I'm not drinking for health reasons, which is not a lie in itself), they are to continue to behave as usual around me and I've asked them not to be offended if I go to bed earlier than I might otherwise have done. Mum said that was absolutely fine and she appreciated me bringing it up in advance.

2. I asked my OH (who knows I'm quitting drinking because I have a problem) that if I start to feel uncomfortable at the wedding later on in the evening if it would be alright for us to get a taxi to the train station nearby and make our home that way instead of the bus. He agreed - not a problem.

Never fails to amaze me how often I forget that 'a problem shared is a problem halved' and sometimes a lot of unnecessary additional angst can be prevented!
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Old 12-19-2013, 12:34 PM
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Sounds like a good bit of forward planning Nightswimming ,

People don't tend to notice when i slip away … i find a good book in my bag and my laptop and wireless internet to keep in touch with SR handy . Always a good idea to have someone you can wave your hand at to help you escape as well

There will be other christmases and weddings you can stay at when your sobriety is rock solid , if you'd want to (when your sober you see them with new eyes) .

Stay strong

Bestwishes, m
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Old 12-19-2013, 12:35 PM
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Well done, nightswimming That's called taking control of a situation and putting the AV right in its place!
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Old 12-19-2013, 12:37 PM
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Hi Nightswimming, i think you have done the smart thing in planning ahead. You will get through it. Best wishes.
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Old 12-20-2013, 01:31 AM
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Thanks for the support guys. If the wedding wasn't a very good friend's I would probably have cancelled but really want to see her enjoy her big day! Look forward to remembering the meal at this wedding...
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