Do i need help?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
Do i need help?
hello everyone,
I have come here because i am so stuck. I drink 4+ times a week just to get out of my head. when its a bad week im drunk 5-7 nights out of 7. i dont HAVE to drink every night, (or at least to me i dont) its just i crave alcohol and im very rarely able to resist it, so on my way home from work most nights i buy alchohol. id be drunk all the time if i could. i still have a full time job (although i took 6 weeks off with depression, got drunk every day, and turned up to work outings drunk and got a written warning for it when i returned.)
Its just i dont know if i have a REAL problem or not.. my mum is desperate for me to stop, girlfriends have left me because they are scared of my drinking, and my friends dont get drunk as much as me so i often get drunk on my own. work have told me i will be getting random breath testings because i have turned up to work a few times smelling of alcohol, and i also got banned from driving for drink driving 18 months ago.
Do i have a problem, or have i just made wrong choices?? I've attempted suicide 3 times in the last 3 months, each time i was drunk, im just at my wits end, i dont know if i have a problem with alcohol or if its everything else. i have managed to stop drinking for 5 days at the most in the last 6 months so i know im not physically dependant.
any help would be appreciated, im only 23, all the people who have had alcohol problems that i know are gone so i cant ask for any honest advice anywhere else.
cheers
I have come here because i am so stuck. I drink 4+ times a week just to get out of my head. when its a bad week im drunk 5-7 nights out of 7. i dont HAVE to drink every night, (or at least to me i dont) its just i crave alcohol and im very rarely able to resist it, so on my way home from work most nights i buy alchohol. id be drunk all the time if i could. i still have a full time job (although i took 6 weeks off with depression, got drunk every day, and turned up to work outings drunk and got a written warning for it when i returned.)
Its just i dont know if i have a REAL problem or not.. my mum is desperate for me to stop, girlfriends have left me because they are scared of my drinking, and my friends dont get drunk as much as me so i often get drunk on my own. work have told me i will be getting random breath testings because i have turned up to work a few times smelling of alcohol, and i also got banned from driving for drink driving 18 months ago.
Do i have a problem, or have i just made wrong choices?? I've attempted suicide 3 times in the last 3 months, each time i was drunk, im just at my wits end, i dont know if i have a problem with alcohol or if its everything else. i have managed to stop drinking for 5 days at the most in the last 6 months so i know im not physically dependant.
any help would be appreciated, im only 23, all the people who have had alcohol problems that i know are gone so i cant ask for any honest advice anywhere else.
cheers
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,380
my mum is desperate for me to stop, girlfriends have left me because they are scared of my drinking, and my friends dont get drunk as much as me so i often get drunk on my own. work have told me i will be getting random breath testings because i have turned up to work a few times smelling of alcohol, and i also got banned from driving for drink driving 18 months ago.
I've attempted suicide 3 times in the last 3 months, each time i was drunk, im just at my wits end
I've attempted suicide 3 times in the last 3 months, each time i was drunk, im just at my wits end
There are certainly red flags here^
It's not about how much you drink, or even how often but what happens to you when you do.
Sounds like your life would be a lot better without alcohol in it, yeah?
you've come to a great place for support - welcome
D
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,475
It's not up to anyone to tell you that you have a problem. That's something you need to decide yourself.
Stop drinking for a month and you will easily find out if you have a problem or not.
I hope sincerely, that you are getting help for the multiple suicide attempts. Are you getting counselling of any kind?
Stop drinking for a month and you will easily find out if you have a problem or not.
I hope sincerely, that you are getting help for the multiple suicide attempts. Are you getting counselling of any kind?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,062
Hey Trophie,
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm glad you found your way here. There are many good people here to speak with that have been through what you are going through.
I would say based on your story that, yes honey you do have a problem with alcohol as it has affected every area of your life and is preventing you from living a full and healthy life.
The great news is that there is a lot of help out here for you if YOU WANT it and truly want to get better and are willing to do what it takes...
It is a choice, but it takes work an commitment from you. There isn't a magic bullet or pill...
But it is possible to get out from under this while you are young and have a full life ahead.
I hope you choose that!!!
Welcome!!!
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm glad you found your way here. There are many good people here to speak with that have been through what you are going through.
I would say based on your story that, yes honey you do have a problem with alcohol as it has affected every area of your life and is preventing you from living a full and healthy life.
The great news is that there is a lot of help out here for you if YOU WANT it and truly want to get better and are willing to do what it takes...
It is a choice, but it takes work an commitment from you. There isn't a magic bullet or pill...
But it is possible to get out from under this while you are young and have a full life ahead.
I hope you choose that!!!
Welcome!!!
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,025
Welcome to SR, Trophie.
I would say you have a real problem.
There may be other wrong choices involved, but alcohol sounds like it's definitely a wrong choice for you & a good place to start making better choices.
Stick around SR and you'll get a lot of great information.
I would say you have a real problem.
There may be other wrong choices involved, but alcohol sounds like it's definitely a wrong choice for you & a good place to start making better choices.
Stick around SR and you'll get a lot of great information.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Around and About
Posts: 1,254
Dee, how simple and elegantly said:
"It's not about how much you drink, or even how often but what happens to you when you do.
Sounds like your life would be a lot better without alcohol in it, yeah?"
That is good advice for any of us.
Welcome Trophie1990, you have found a great place.
"It's not about how much you drink, or even how often but what happens to you when you do.
Sounds like your life would be a lot better without alcohol in it, yeah?"
That is good advice for any of us.
Welcome Trophie1990, you have found a great place.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
I am not sure what I can say. Makes me really sad about the suicide attempts. Do you think Alcohol was a factor? Girlfriend leaving, is Alcohol a factor? If the answer is yes, maybe you have your answer. It appears that people are worried about you, even us on SR.
Hope you find your answer, life is so much more than booze and misery.
Hope you find your answer, life is so much more than booze and misery.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
my god everyone, thankyou for your response and input!
I used to have a very bad drug habit, (daily usage) i quit that and alcohol for 6 months and was completely teetotal. I know how addicted to things i can bef from my drug use.. Then i started drinking again and some awful events happened in my life almost as a result, and then i just couldnt stop. I have been clean from drugs for over a year now, no illegal substances, but ive definitely just replaced it with alcohol and im finding it hard to get away from alcohol. I have been having counselling for around 18 months, to help with depression. the alcohol has ruined relationships because id often get drunk and abusive. ive also gotted drunk and made an attempt on my life when relationships ended, because of a build up of emotions i never dealt with. Substance abuse has always been my way of coping with things..
So what has helped people to get sober? Id like to be able to lead a life where i didnt look to substances to pick me up. Im at a point where im ready to make a change, things have gotten rock bottom nearly, the only thing im hanging on to is my job, and that is declining by the day. i just dont know where to begin, and people tell me alcohol is a huge problem in my life because of the amount i drink and the way my character changes.. half of me believes that, i just dont know how to begin to solve it
sophie
I used to have a very bad drug habit, (daily usage) i quit that and alcohol for 6 months and was completely teetotal. I know how addicted to things i can bef from my drug use.. Then i started drinking again and some awful events happened in my life almost as a result, and then i just couldnt stop. I have been clean from drugs for over a year now, no illegal substances, but ive definitely just replaced it with alcohol and im finding it hard to get away from alcohol. I have been having counselling for around 18 months, to help with depression. the alcohol has ruined relationships because id often get drunk and abusive. ive also gotted drunk and made an attempt on my life when relationships ended, because of a build up of emotions i never dealt with. Substance abuse has always been my way of coping with things..
So what has helped people to get sober? Id like to be able to lead a life where i didnt look to substances to pick me up. Im at a point where im ready to make a change, things have gotten rock bottom nearly, the only thing im hanging on to is my job, and that is declining by the day. i just dont know where to begin, and people tell me alcohol is a huge problem in my life because of the amount i drink and the way my character changes.. half of me believes that, i just dont know how to begin to solve it
sophie
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,380
Substance abuse was my way of coping with things too. The problem with that is we often forget there are other, healthier ways to cope.
For me the two things that helped the most to keep me sober were support, and change Sophie.
The supports pretty self explanatory - places like this, counselling or a recovery group like AA or one of the non 12 step alternatives.
As for change - I had to build a life, and a 'me', I didn't want to run away from.
It took a little time & work, but it was well worth the effort
D
For me the two things that helped the most to keep me sober were support, and change Sophie.
The supports pretty self explanatory - places like this, counselling or a recovery group like AA or one of the non 12 step alternatives.
As for change - I had to build a life, and a 'me', I didn't want to run away from.
It took a little time & work, but it was well worth the effort
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Substance abuse was my way of coping with things too. The problem with that is we often forget there are other, healthier ways to cope.
For me the two things that helped the most to keep me sober were support, and change Sophie.
The supports pretty self explanatory - places like this, counselling or a recovery group like AA or one of the non 12 step alternatives.
As for change - I had to build a life, and a 'me', I didn't want to run away from.
It took a little time & work, but it was well worth the effort
D
For me the two things that helped the most to keep me sober were support, and change Sophie.
The supports pretty self explanatory - places like this, counselling or a recovery group like AA or one of the non 12 step alternatives.
As for change - I had to build a life, and a 'me', I didn't want to run away from.
It took a little time & work, but it was well worth the effort
D
thanks so much for your reply i appreciate it - do you think a group like AA helped alot?
Ive been to a community alcohol team which i got referred to from being in the mental health unit when i made an attempt on me life, but they just offered general adivce, and because i wasnt physically dependent, (ie i dont get the shakes or sweats when not drinking) Im just classed as psychologically dependant, there wasnt alot they could offer in the way of medical help (they couldnt prescribe me a detox or meds to stop cravings)
I have considered AA but not sure how helpful it would be. other experiences would be helpful
Sophie
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Thepatman
I am not sure what I can say. Makes me really sad about the suicide attempts. Do you think Alcohol was a factor? Girlfriend leaving, is Alcohol a factor? If the answer is yes, maybe you have your answer. It appears that people are worried about you, even us on SR.
Hope you find your answer, life is so much more than booze and misery.
Hope you find your answer, life is so much more than booze and misery.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Pamel
Dee, how simple and elegantly said:
"It's not about how much you drink, or even how often but what happens to you when you do.
Sounds like your life would be a lot better without alcohol in it, yeah?"
That is good advice for any of us.
Welcome Trophie1990, you have found a great place.
"It's not about how much you drink, or even how often but what happens to you when you do.
Sounds like your life would be a lot better without alcohol in it, yeah?"
That is good advice for any of us.
Welcome Trophie1990, you have found a great place.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
You have to try all options you can. AA worked for many people.
Then there is the other half of you that need to also want to be sober. If your entire energy is put towards sobriety then you will make it. You have to go all the way. Alcohol is a depressant also, so stoping will help with other issues you have.
Then there is the other half of you that need to also want to be sober. If your entire energy is put towards sobriety then you will make it. You have to go all the way. Alcohol is a depressant also, so stoping will help with other issues you have.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Kat60
Hey Trophie,
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm glad you found your way here. There are many good people here to speak with that have been through what you are going through.
I would say based on your story that, yes honey you do have a problem with alcohol as it has affected every area of your life and is preventing you from living a full and healthy life.
The great news is that there is a lot of help out here for you if YOU WANT it and truly want to get better and are willing to do what it takes...
It is a choice, but it takes work an commitment from you. There isn't a magic bullet or pill...
But it is possible to get out from under this while you are young and have a full life ahead.
I hope you choose that!!!
Welcome!!!
Thanks for sharing your story. I'm glad you found your way here. There are many good people here to speak with that have been through what you are going through.
I would say based on your story that, yes honey you do have a problem with alcohol as it has affected every area of your life and is preventing you from living a full and healthy life.
The great news is that there is a lot of help out here for you if YOU WANT it and truly want to get better and are willing to do what it takes...
It is a choice, but it takes work an commitment from you. There isn't a magic bullet or pill...
But it is possible to get out from under this while you are young and have a full life ahead.
I hope you choose that!!!
Welcome!!!
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,025
Alcohol is a depressant. It can make you suicidal. I hope you treat alcohol as a thing to avoid, seriously.
AA helped me a lot. I was physically dependent & AA doesn't help much with that, but it helps to have people to talk to & listen to who have a problem with alcohol.
A lot of people have a hard time w/some parts of AA. I do too, to be honest. But it helped me a huge amount, and there's no commitment, no fee, virtually no harm in trying it out for a while.
AA helped me a lot. I was physically dependent & AA doesn't help much with that, but it helps to have people to talk to & listen to who have a problem with alcohol.
A lot of people have a hard time w/some parts of AA. I do too, to be honest. But it helped me a huge amount, and there's no commitment, no fee, virtually no harm in trying it out for a while.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Stockport
Posts: 11
Originally Posted by Thepatman
You have to try all options you can. AA worked for many people.
Then there is the other half of you that need to also want to be sober. If your entire energy is put towards sobriety then you will make it. You have to go all the way. Alcohol is a depressant also, so stoping will help with other issues you have.
Then there is the other half of you that need to also want to be sober. If your entire energy is put towards sobriety then you will make it. You have to go all the way. Alcohol is a depressant also, so stoping will help with other issues you have.
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