seazr

After a two year period of no drinking, I suddenly craved a drink and somehow decided I could just secretly have a couple of drinks and step away. Not so much. Don't remember how that first relapse ended but generally my husband figures it out or I confess. As you must have figured, I've had several relapses . . . One ended with a broken ankle and one recent ended with a trip to emergency because I thought I had alcohol poisoning but I didn't.
The oddest thing is I don't like the taste of alcholol and I don't like how it makes me feel or behave. I am an upbeat person and alcholol brings me down. I have no idea why I relapse but my triggers seem to be "nothing else to do when I'm alone" or celebrating a very happy feeling--why would I want to celebrate with something that makes me feel so bad????
Sigh . . .
My greatest success was when I adopted a totally healthy lifestyle and became a bit obsessive about it. I've backed off a bit on that but maybe I'll go back that way . . .

Mizzuno

Yes, being obsessive in a healthy way is a lot better than breaking bones and emergency room adventures. You can change this pattern and move onto being healthy again. I do not know why any of us choose to oblige in the thing that has destruction written all over it. It is done though, and most of us come out on the other side a mess and wishing we had refrained from the madness. You can choose a different path to walk! If I can do it, you can do it.

soberhawk

Welcome back seazr.

I have been sober since august now – I have a strong feeling that I do not want to waste more life and time on alcohol.

I think there is a method that works for everyone – it is just to find out what works.

Dee74

welcome back Seazr - good to see you
Addiction wise, I've tried it all ways - the best way is no booze at all

D

Hevyn

Glad you came back Seazr. I did the same thing many times - always was determined to use willpower to moderate. It never worked once. I had to admit I can't have a drop. It's much easier that way.

Anna

I'm glad you're back.

I, too, was triggered by the ups and downs of my emotions. Following a healthy lifestyle seems like a good idea and hopefully you can enjoy it, and not be too obsessive about it.

Thepatman

Welcome back. Maybe try something different this time around?

least

Glad you're back giving it another go.

Johnston

Welcome back

KateL

Glad you posted. Just go back to where you were before the slips. You can be like that again. A bit of obsessiveness is not unusual and doesn't really hurt anyone. No one is perfect although you sounded like you were doing fine. Just get back to that

azureseas

I did the same thing after 1.5 yrs, it was ok to start, very moderate, but gradually things ramped up
Now coming up on 3 weeks, brain fog clearing, feel kinda happy and free