offtrack

Hey, everyone! I used to be a member here a while back but I'm not sure what my old login info is. So, here is my situation and I'm hoping someone can offer some helpful advice.

I'm not drinking that much these days. 0 personal consumption on my own. The only time I drink is when I go out. But, man, when I go out and drink, I do drink a lot.

The thing is, though, that alcohol isn't really creating that much negativity in my life these days, BUT, I know just one slip up is all it would take to really do something stupid and screw up.

So here's my dilemma: Anytime I say "Okay, I'm going to try and stop drinking again," drinking is no longer something that I just do once every 10 days or so, the fact that I can't drink becomes a terrible, consuming thought that weighs on me almost every moment of every day because I know it's something that I'm depriving myself of and then I always just end up having a few drinks at some point and I'm back to square one.

I'm afraid I can never conquer this cycle. Has anyone else ever experienced a similar dilemma and if so, how do you overcome it?

Johnston

I overcame this cycle by finally opting for 100% abstinence and sticking to my resolution. The thoughts of drinking gradually fade with time I have found. Good luck.

ScottFromWI

I think just about everyone here has experienced that same dilemma. For me the fact that life is much better without drinking helped me make then decision finally. Perhaps you haven't reached that point yet?

sugarbear1

I kept drinking until one inebriated night I tried crack, things went downhill for me for the next 15 years.

Today, I stay stopped and have done so for 2.5+ years.

Bruce292

For some of us, with alcohol, it's just a matter of time before bad things start to happen. It certainly was for me. Control was something I thought I had from time to time but I was just kidding myself. I think it's about making a decision about your life. I'm proud of the one I finally made and I'm pretty ashamed of the years I wasted.

doggonecarl

Drinking, no matter how infrequent, keeps the obsession alive. Like the others have said, quit and take the option of ANY kind of drinking off the table.

Mikie9

Hi

"because I know it's something that I'm depriving myself of "

So what is it, exactly, that you are depriving yourself of by not drinking?

awuh1

This is the part that will keep you drinking. Thinking of it as something you are depriving yourself of. Perhaps attempt to think of it as something you are giving up in the short term for greater long term benefit.

Sadly, many like you drink this way till something goes terribly wrong. It's then easier to think of it not as something you are "depriving" yourself of but as something that is making you depraved.

I hope you don't have to go there.

wehav2day

Oh yeah, probably everyone here has shared this dilemma with you. You are in good company! I always felt like you do, like I was denying myself by not drinking. Until I realized that alcohol made my life unmanageable. I wasn't controlling alcohol, it was controlling me.

I didn't get a DUI, I didn't have any issues with my job. I didn't lose my partner. But alcohol owned me.

It's very freeing to give up the notion that you can control your drinking. It left me free to quit.

Kaneda8888

Offtrack

Ask yourself, do non-alcoholics obsess about drinking when they are not drinking ? I think you know the answer to that. It is high risk behaviour to drink, even moderately, if you're an alcoholic. This is the advice from my D&A specialist. So, be conscious of the choice you are making when drink. Best of luck.