Day 16
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: BC
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Day 16
BF is home for the weekend ... I find things much easier when he is gone for some reason (association maybe). I find that I've been more irritable last night and this morning. Something he did ****** me off this morning ... nothing that was a big deal nor out of character for him, I don't know why but it made me mad. 
I left the house and drove into town to do some shopping. It's a half hour drive and the whole way, I'm getting angrier. The incident got under my skin and like a persistent little worm, it made it's way up to my brain where it started to play with the monster in my head. They ganged up on my and started to suggest that a beer might solve all this crap. I recognized it for what it was ... and I kept trying to flip that switch (I don't DO that anymore ... I DON'T DO that anymore .... I DON'T DO THAT ANYMORE!!!!) But they were awfully persistent today ... I managed to put my mental blinders on as I drove past the beer store. Whew, made it to the grocery store. So I'm distracted now, and the nasty monster quiets down a bit. As I am shopping, I run into a friend who starts to regale me with her party story from last night, going to the bar and getting drunk ... blah blah blah. And I don't even register what she's telling me because I am obsessed with how she looks ... and smells. I'm not being high and mighty, don't get me wrong, it was an observation. And I thought to myself "I am SO thankful that I don't look like that, or smell like that, or especially FEEL like that today!!" And the monster shut his mouth ... just like that! NO WAY do I want that again.
I don't know why I felt the NEED to get that out, but I feel better now ... LOL Thanks for reading
I left the house and drove into town to do some shopping. It's a half hour drive and the whole way, I'm getting angrier. The incident got under my skin and like a persistent little worm, it made it's way up to my brain where it started to play with the monster in my head. They ganged up on my and started to suggest that a beer might solve all this crap. I recognized it for what it was ... and I kept trying to flip that switch (I don't DO that anymore ... I DON'T DO that anymore .... I DON'T DO THAT ANYMORE!!!!) But they were awfully persistent today ... I managed to put my mental blinders on as I drove past the beer store. Whew, made it to the grocery store. So I'm distracted now, and the nasty monster quiets down a bit. As I am shopping, I run into a friend who starts to regale me with her party story from last night, going to the bar and getting drunk ... blah blah blah. And I don't even register what she's telling me because I am obsessed with how she looks ... and smells. I'm not being high and mighty, don't get me wrong, it was an observation. And I thought to myself "I am SO thankful that I don't look like that, or smell like that, or especially FEEL like that today!!" And the monster shut his mouth ... just like that! NO WAY do I want that again.I don't know why I felt the NEED to get that out, but I feel better now ... LOL Thanks for reading
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