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should i just let her go?

Old 11-25-2013, 12:16 PM
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should i just let her go?

i've been with my wife for 14 years and started abusing alcohol around the time i met her and finally quit 7 months ago. she moved out with our three boys because she did't want our children to have to live with the person i was. the first couple months separated were rough and now we live in different homes and still see each other almost every day and my relationship with the boys and my wife are getting a lot better. i know i promised her sobriety many times in the past and thats why shes not with me now because i never kept that promise. my wife and i are still close and we are still intimate and have a lot of family time these days but its still with us living in two different homes. she has her guard up really high this time and is hesitant on taking me back for good and i understand that. im just wondering should i just let her go and keep proving im a changed and sober man and see what happens or just go with the flow and wait for her to make a decision on our future?
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Old 11-25-2013, 12:21 PM
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I'd just focus on you and your recovery for now. I'm glad you still see your kids on a regular basis tho. Your wife will see by your actions that you're changing for the better. Leave the decision up to her as you work on yourself and just keep doing the next right thing.
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Old 11-25-2013, 12:54 PM
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Welcome to SR, and congratulations on 7 months sober.

I can't offer any advice on your marriage. Tough situation. Just keep making you the best you can be. That's all you can do, really.

Best of luck on your journey.
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Old 11-25-2013, 01:18 PM
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Just focus on your recovery. My parents were separated for nearly 3 years before they moved back in together. They have been together for 27 more years since then.
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Old 11-25-2013, 01:31 PM
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Hi Joey

I'm sorry for your situation but I'm gonna go with the consensus here - try to focus on you and your recovery for now. Sounds like your wife's already made a choice of sorts. Trying to debate that choice will likely backfire on you.

Work on yourself...get better.
If things are meant to be they will be

D
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Old 11-25-2013, 08:48 PM
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The "letting her go" ship has already sailed. She left.

Trust is the first thing we lose, and the last thing we get back.

Focus on staying sober, and the world will be a better place.
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Old 11-25-2013, 08:58 PM
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I'm going to go with everyone else on this one. The best thing you can do right now is to continue to focus on your recovery. What will be will be. You are doing great so the best thing you can do is keep that up!

Welcome to SR!
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