Try18

So tomorrow will be a week since my last drink ... I feel a physical difference now my withdrawals seem to have passed, I've been starting to sort out at all the mess I made, have kept all my appointments, back at AA. Yet this afternoon my thoughts switched right to alcohol. When I was in the store buying cigarettes I caught myself staring at it behind the counter and my mouth was practically watering. Its been popping in and out of my head since and im sitting here feeling it still. I had no intention of buying it burgee im just shocked at how strong this has come on, and I feel a bit angry at alcohol too. It gets into my head so bad. I have so much to live for and don't want to go back there. Friday nights are always my downfall. Its 16:30 here now and im going to an 20:00 meeting. I just know how powerful it is and I wanted to share. Those is the longed I've been sober in a good few months and I don't want to put it in jeopardy as if my sobriety goes, so does everything else eventually until all that's left is a shell of me and the bottle.

Sorry for the long post x

mecanix

Hey Try ,
Glad you're here , healthy thing to do i recon ,
Here is the link to Dee's thread about dealing with craving , might be useful sometime http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html

Keep on

Bestwishes, m

Skye2

How about adding the 'weekend thread' here, to the meeting There are quite a few of us Xx

doggonecarl

Stay strong. Cravings can come and go with amazing fierceness the first few weeks. Be prepared. Have a strategy. Get some numbers from your group so you can have someone to call when they strike.

Mags1

Hi Try, well done for tomorrow, a week without alcohol. That's great.
Here here to a booze free weekend for all of us x

Try18

Thanks I will join they thread and have a look at the suggestions in the other.

Dogonecarl I have numbers but i find it so hard to call. I dont know why. It is one of the things i definitely need to change as it just keeps me in my own head.

doggonecarl

You were given the numbers for a reason...to call. Believe it or not, their helping you helps them. You'll understand when give your number out and you find yourself talking someone down from the cliff of drinking. It strengthens your recovery.

Try18

I called someone. She also needed someone to talk to about stuff going on for her. Meeting her before the meeting so to speak.

The anxiety of dialling is always unreal...seriously, Whats the worst that can happen? Nuts.

mecanix

congratulations on reaching out Try18 ,
thats a cool thing to do .

m

IOAA2

Hi. If we are alcoholic the natural thing to do in the beginning of sobriety is to want to drink. Staying sober is now the path I needed to take and do things I needed to do like make that call. As stated it usually works both ways. Congratulations! I needed to remember that many baby steps add up to leaps when looking back.

BE WELL

neferkamichael

Try18, a week is FANTASTIC, congratulations. It took awhile for the cravings to go away for me, but they have vanished, and they will for you too. Rootin for ya.

Try18

Im glad I reached out to both places, here and my friend. When I was typing it out on here I realised how crazy it is, thinking about drinking. The beginning of this week was he'll, and I'll be right back there if I drank. In fact for me there are no guarantees of where I would go. Iheard a lady say in a meeting the other night that she had another drink in her but not another recovery. Heard it before but the penny never really dropped until then. I know that even when the cravings do go away I'll need to work hard at this, it pops up out of nowhere! Well for now just going to focus on tonight. Not going to get ahead of myself!

bemyself

Try, I've given a lot of thought to why I too just do not pick up that phone when a craving strikes....for me anyway, I began to realise that I DIDN'T WANT to be talked down. I wanted to drink. A bit like how AVRT / Rational Recovery describes it as a 'reversal of intent' [intent to never drink].

Not saying that's how it is for you, just thought I'd throw it into the mix.

Best thing is: in the end, you didn't / haven't picked up.

tate9685

The part of your brain that is addicted is roaring it's ugly head. The part of you that wants to be healthy and have a happy life is angry at alcohol/your addiction. Try telling that part of you that is only concerned with getting high that you see it and know what it is trying to do, but that you are in control of your body now. It's called Rational Recovery.....(one of the many tools that I use at times....) Good luck. Yes Fridays are tough right now. Hopefully, you will find some fellowship in the meetings and some non using friends and activities to keep you busy and fulfilled without alcohol.

Try18

Well as far as Im concerned I made it through today even though its only 10pm. Im sober and feeling grateful that I am.
Bemyself i agree with that, changing behavior is hard but necessary so i know i need to start using the phone more. I know it works. Maybe thats why in the past i haven't done it. Sharing Whats in my head with another person always puts it in perspective.

Thankyou for all your support and patience guys. X

Ruby2

Hi Try,

I won't add much more to what has already been said. I have trouble thinking about the alcohol when I go buy cigarettes and there is an array of liquor behind the counter, staring me in the face. I start pricing it. Not really to buy it but out of old habits. Perhaps for a while you can buy cigarettes somewhere they don't sell liquor. I found that helps me.

deeker

ur doing great try18!

Try18

Thanks deeker, you've been a great support this week. Ruby2 that is a simple yet very good idea ...I will do that!

dirk626

Keep it up Try! Every time you tell the monster no and stay true to yourself the monster loses a little bit of power. You can do this!

Try18

Today was truly a day to be grateful for. I had a lovely time with my family this afternoon, after a great meeting this morning. One i have been to a lot in the past where I have been in many states - happy, crying, angry, months sober, hungover, you name it. But always felt so welcome and there is strong recovery within it. Great way to start the weekend. So I joined the group! It is a long time since I have been in one and Im looking forward to being 'part of' AA again. Next week Im on coffee duty

I am wary of how good I have felt today, however. Suspicious almost.I dunno if that makes sense.

Going to bed very thankful. Just thought i would let you know how i was getting on X