(No) friends
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,361
(No) friends
I still dont have any friends.
A year ago, two years ago, three years ago, this would get me depressed, make me feel socially awkward and unhappy with myself.
For as a pothead i would have loads of friends.
Friends who did not care, friends who just wanted to get high, who were never there when i needed them.
Being sober, i find most (soberisch) people still not caring, never there when needed, and instead of wanting to smoke my weed and eat my food, they want something else.
Its like no social connection can exist without an exchange of something.
Attachment is suffering (buddha).
...
The last year im becoming my own best friend. I love the fact im free.
Im with my girlfriend, all the pets, i got my job, and i got me-time, more doesnt fit in the schedule actually.
My former-wasted-semi-social life was a lie. I remember being most of my time alone as a kid, feeling just fine. That changed during high school, when i started comparing myself with others. Wanting what they seemed to have.
My former-wasted-semi-social life....."they" can keep it. Have it back.
Ive asked myself the question if im just telling myself its oke to be alone in this world (aside from relationship). That deep down i still feel misaberly about it?
But i can honestly say i much rather do my own stuff in life then being trapped in projections of others for thats how a social life often feels to me nowadays.
Wanted to share
A year ago, two years ago, three years ago, this would get me depressed, make me feel socially awkward and unhappy with myself.
For as a pothead i would have loads of friends.
Friends who did not care, friends who just wanted to get high, who were never there when i needed them.
Being sober, i find most (soberisch) people still not caring, never there when needed, and instead of wanting to smoke my weed and eat my food, they want something else.
Its like no social connection can exist without an exchange of something.
Attachment is suffering (buddha).
...
The last year im becoming my own best friend. I love the fact im free.
Im with my girlfriend, all the pets, i got my job, and i got me-time, more doesnt fit in the schedule actually.
My former-wasted-semi-social life was a lie. I remember being most of my time alone as a kid, feeling just fine. That changed during high school, when i started comparing myself with others. Wanting what they seemed to have.
My former-wasted-semi-social life....."they" can keep it. Have it back.
Ive asked myself the question if im just telling myself its oke to be alone in this world (aside from relationship). That deep down i still feel misaberly about it?
But i can honestly say i much rather do my own stuff in life then being trapped in projections of others for thats how a social life often feels to me nowadays.
Wanted to share
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
I don't think there is anything wrong with not wanting to be social. I feel that is a choice.
I used to like to be alone but now I need people. Not only because I happen to like them but I try and see what I can do for others. Maybe I can offer someone a ride or I can bring a snack to a meeting. I brought cookies last night. No big deal really but it helps me to help others. To make the effort to not have my own wishes and wants in the front of my mind anymore.
I used to like to be alone but now I need people. Not only because I happen to like them but I try and see what I can do for others. Maybe I can offer someone a ride or I can bring a snack to a meeting. I brought cookies last night. No big deal really but it helps me to help others. To make the effort to not have my own wishes and wants in the front of my mind anymore.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Lynnwood WA
Posts: 424
My drinking friends were awful and my boyfriend (now my ex) was just as bad. I am happy to have my family, my job and coworkers, and my sponsor and AA support groups. I find that being alone is actually pretty pleasant for now and I will eventually get to the point where I make close friends but for now I am just working on making myself a better person.
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