AndreTT

Has anyone ever have experience with relocating to a new place in recovery? Does it help? I have mentioned this to therapists and to other people at 12 step meetings. The answer is usually along the lines of "You are only running away from your problems", "Wherever you go, there you are".
But it seems like I just cant live where I'm living in anymore. I live at home with my parents and they fight everyday and this home is a mess. The holidays are coming and it's just about to get worse. I feel so much better when I'm away from home. Besides, I'm 23 already and it seeems like I should be living in my own place. Does anyone have any thoughts?

Raider

Your parents will kill me for saying this as I am sure they love having you, but if you can afford it, move out. You are 23 years old. That's young adult age. Time to fly.

Dee74

Sometimes people need to move, Andre, for reasons other, or reasons beyond, recovery.
If you feel you need to move, move

D

suki44883

I agree with the above posters. If you are able to move, then I think you should give that gift to yourself.

DecBaby

Go. It's worth a try. It's a beautiful thing to have peace at home.

AndreTT

Wow, I'm surprised with the answers! I was expecting criticism.

I forgot to say, though, that I plan to move to a place that is about 15 miles away from here so I will not be able to come back so often (probably only twice a week) to see my dogs. I'm the one to take them to walks

This is kinda making me feel guilty

Raider

Criticism? No way. Why feel guilty?

Soberween

I think moving to a new place is perfectly fine. I'm not sure if you mean a nearby place. I feel like moving to a new city or somewhere faraway can make one vulnerable to a relapse. Being in a environment where no one knows your history, etc. may make some open to trying to go back out and drink. Just have your tool box ready and do whatever it takes to not fall into that old life that you worked so hard to get away from.

Skye2

Andre - try and leave amicably - that way, if you don't like where you've move to, you can always go back

MythOfSisyphus

It's good to get your own space, to learn to stretch your wings. But as has been said, do it nicely without trying to make your parents feel bad. They will always be your parents!

Zube

The worst relapse I could imagine came when I turned my back on my support group and moved 5 states away. That being said, I agree with the others that say move out of your folks place.

Good Luck,
Zube

AndreTT

Because when I move away I'm not gonna be able to take my dogs for walks on an almost daily basis that I do now

jazzfish

There is what's known as the geographical cure where people move thinking that living in a new location will, without effort, solve all their problems. That does not sound at all like what you are looking for.

Back in the dark ages, I used to live with three roommates who drank and drugged all day long. It only made sense to move, and I did, and it was great for me. Go for it!

jazzfish

You could always take them with you. You may even notice that they act calmer in the new situation.

If not, I would still put your own welfare above that of the dogs.

Croissant

Will your parents make you feel guilty? Will you expect them to look after your dogs?

In theory, I agree with moving if the friction at home is damaging your recovery. But, what are your plans for your pets? It could come up as an issue for arguments/pressure.

AndreTT

The dogs are actually my parent's. They take care of them. The only thing that I do really is taking them for walks.

Zube

Move out. Buy a dog. Be Happy.

Zube

Anna

I moved because of my husband's job, in the first week of recovery. It was a long-distance move and English was not the first language in the new city. Since I couldn't speak the language, I looked for volunteer work and found a great opportunity. It turned out to be the best thing I could have done.

Croissant

Well, go for it!