Servicedog

I have several years of sobriety and owe it to my relationship with my wife as my Major helper (she's never drank more than a few drinks per year) and my use of prayer when I get spinning or have an urge. I am now working on my relationship with my higher power as my way of keeping myself grounded. I thought I was doing OK until I reflected on a response I had to a bully type the other day. It's not that it made me want to drink or drug but I was not happy with my response to him. I asked in prayer to be able to get over my frustration with my disability and be able to walk through the day without reacting adversely to those who threaten me. I feel if I don't get over this it would lead me to having an attitude and than give me a feeling that I was tough enough to go ahead an use or drink.

Ghostlight1

Good for you. Prayer works. Be sure to pray for your enemies, too.

Best to you.

MythOfSisyphus

Welcome to SR, Servicedog. I hope you find the answer you seek in your prayers.

LadyinBC

WElcome Service Dog! Thank you so much for sharing that.

least

to SR!

littlefish

Welcome! Since you have mentioned your use of prayer I might suggest finding some writings by Emmet Fox. He has a wonderful book that takes an in depth look at the sermon on the mount. The first thing that your post made me think of was "resist not evil". According to Fox, and fast forwarding to modern language, this phrase means: "don't respond to negative energy".
When you focus on the negativity that is thrown your way, you strengthen it. When you ignore it, it loses power. I know it's hard to walk away from bullies, but engaging with them feeds into their agenda and gives them opportunity for more bullying.
well, that was my two cents for the day!

pinkdog

Hi Servicedog, welcome. The fact that you are analyzing and trying to understand and modify your reactions sounds like progress to me. Good job. Love and prayers.

freshstart57

Nothing wrong with being tough, but it would be more helpful to believe that you are tough enough to stay sober, no matter the situation, rather than tough enough to drink.