mproff

I just wanted to share where I am in my point of recovery...just got out of inpatient rehab on Sunday. Currently going to IOP for 8 weeks and doing my best to try 90 in 90 with NA meetings. So good so far, but feeling very overwhelmed with doing all this plus working at my job again which is very stressful at times but I need the money. Its easy right now not to have many distractions because my parents are helping me out by putting guidelines to living at their house fresh out of rehab. I'm 19 but I know I need the help and I haven't seen or really talked to anyone since I came back home after 3 weeks of inpatient. I had my number changed and no longer have texting either. Honestly the only thing bothering me is my ex boyfriend even though I haven't spoken to him and he is currently in rehab out of state as well. Before I left, his ex girlfriend was harassing me about how he just used me for my money and there's a long story about our relationship but I was extremely betrayed by him and its hard for me to let it go and forgive him...I think this is the only thing holding me back from my true potential in recovery and I'm having a really hard time with it especially once he gets out I'm not sure if I should get a restraining order because he's unpredictable and was very mentally unstable last I saw him. Hopefully he has accepted the help he needs because he's a two year heroine addict as well as alcoholic. One part of me feels terrible about his situation because all I've ever wanted was to help him and that's all I've ever done was love and care for him. But then another part of me obsesses over the anger I have toward him for doing the things he did to me. I apologize for my long rant but I'm not really one to talk about these things openly with my family so it just feels good to get them out! Thanks for anyone for taking the time to read... I wish the best for everyone
-m

Dee74

hi and welcome mproff
congratulations on your sober time

In the end, it's up to you, but if you feel scared or in danger I think a restraining order can be a sensible precaution

D

SpeedRacer

No apologies needed mproff. I'm glad you came here and shared with us. I have a similar feeling about my ex, and unfortunately working at the same place, I struggle dealing with these feelings constantly. You may have to evaluate the choices you make in moving forward past your ex, but those are solely yours to make. I know we want to help others, but I feel our only control is within ourselves. You are doing a great job taking care of you. Keep your focus on you and your recovery. We're always here to listen.