teardrop

went to my first smart recovery meeting yesterday, and thought it was sh!t, people still drinking there, one brought a bottle of vodka, one very angry person, which was quite intimidating, and felt pushed upon to speak, if i didnt have aa experience i dont know which way i would have gone, stayed? kicked off? walked out? drank?

also yesterday for first time in ages i felt happy about nothing really, (this lasted all day) i knew it wouldnt last cause today i feel sh!t and insecure and like crying and that life is f....ing sh!t

early recovery sucks it better not be like this for ever!!!

Skye2

Hey teardrop - emotions are all over the place in the beginning You'll be fine!
Sounds like a horrible meeting I had wondered about trying theirs but that has put me right off. Are there no guidelines for people going to those?
Would love to know more about it, if you feel up to posting?

Hugs to you - stay strong Xx

anyistoomuch

ARGH! That sounds awful! It's like "hi - you are all trying to quit drinking, but I am going to let someone in with a bottle of vodka..." That makes NO sense to me.

HOLD ON to that moment when you felt happy. Keep trying to remember that moment, even force yourself to pretend you are reexperiencing it. Your brain is creating NEW pathways for you and that was the first path...don't let the ****** feelings pave over that happy one.

Skye2

I don't really 'do' AA, but I think if I ever feel the urge to go to meetings, it'll be one of theirs. At least they're polite etc.

Hawkeye13

I was very sad and depressed for several months when I first stopped.
As others have said, you are making new pathways and ways to deal with things.
Don't give up. Drinking will just take you back down emotionally and you know that for sure.

Sorry meeting sucked. I can't believe that people could bring booze. Is there another group you can try?

teardrop

ive just got 3 or 4 aa meetings i use, my smart recovery experience is sh!t i tried to go to one once when i was really struggling and no one turned up cause it was school holidays, then yesterdays was sh!t

aa is cool sometimes bugs me when they all sort of cross share about the later steps 8 9 etc

the god thing is cool now too though i hated that for ages, i just know im not the boss, its that simple, i dont pray or meditate etc i dont beleive in god on a white cloud i dont beleive in heaven and hell, i just know im a small cog in the world

got a great sponsor

got mental health issues ocd which i would love to be able to manage

but not had a drink since 30th sept this year

aa is always there yeah i got to drive to meetings but if i really want i can go to a meeting every day its always there

ive only know of one meeting be cancelled which yes did p!ss me off cause we all know we would do anything for a drink or drug, so they should do anything to keep a meeting going just cause the chair person couldnt make it that week, and i know of a couple of meetings close due to very low membership but that was after much hard work trying to get members to attend and give these meetings support

i even once went to a women only meeting by mistake but they let me stay

no i dont like smart but thats my opinion please dont let me put you off

Skye2

Thanks. It hasn't put me of as such, it's just it seems that they don't have any rules in place, if you know what I mean? The couple of times that I went to AA, if someone had been drinking, they weren't encouraged to share that night. Seems also, that they universally want to look out for you, you know?
I know people say it's a 'cult', but surely cults are wanting money etc from you?
My head's a bit all over the place today to be honest.

Razorback

I would report that SMART meeting, that is absolutely not OK by their standards. There is supposed to be a trained facilitator at each meeting who should NOT allow alcohol in the room, to say the least.

richp10

Absolutely right Razorback - this is NOT okay at ANY SMART Recovery meeting..

Teardrop - can you private message me about which meeting it was - I am with the SMART Recovery team and I absolutely promise you will look into this. I don't need your name or anything, just the rough location of the meeting so we can get someone from the local volunteer network to work out what is going wrong.

Thanks..

R

Twinings

That's not a normal smart meeting in my experience.
There is a strict abstinence on the day of the meeting rule.
Sorry you had such an awful time.... please report it, so far, smart has saved my ass in my recovery.

chaili05

I agree... I've never been to a SMART meeting but would love to try it out and know that that's not allowed.
Don't let it dampen your feelings on recovery!!! <3

Dee74

Our attitude counts for a lot I think.

I know you feel you have a lot of things wrong with your life right now - and thats tough, there's no denying that...but what about focusing a little more on the things that are going right?

think a little on about all the blessings you have and the things you should be grateful for, teardrop.

Try and be patient. Try and think the long game.

We drank for years. It's going to take a little longer than a month to sort ourselves out, yeah?

D

sicknote

Jeeez that sounds horrible. I was tempted to check out SMART.

I've done a few crap AA meetings.

Yeah that's me aswell. I feel rubbish. I want a drink, but I really don't want a drink. I've been told it wont always be like this tho. So we've got hope that things will get better. And as Dee said I guess we need to focus on the good and be patient.

Hope you feel better soon!!

Dee74

Just to be fair, this is the only negative feedback I've seen here about SMART ever.

I'm not a member, but one of the other mods here is a facilitator and I think it sounds a great approach.

I'd hate for one bad experience to put others off.
If anyone is interested, best thing to do is check it out for yourself.

D

teardrop

i did actually type in my last post the following

no i dont like smart but thats my opinion please dont let me put you off

teardrop

and this was the day after nothing to do with the smart meeting

teardrop

why would i come on here and lie???

i went to a smart meeting which was cancelled due to school holidays in york n yorkshire

i went to a smart meeting in goole e yorkshire and one person was verbally aggressive, one was still drinking and stank of booze, one brought a bottle of vodka with them

thats what happened

i posted it on here to have a bit of a winge

its not my fault and nowt to do with my actions as to why these three people acted in this way in this meeting

deeker

Who said you were lying? No one said you were lying teardrop.

It was your experience and I am sure it happens, no one said you were lying.

Dee74

Noone is accusing you of lying teardrop - and my post wasn't an attack on you.

Relax man. We're all on the same side.
There's no fight here, ok?

D

Skye2

Hi there, no-one is accusing you of lying I think the shock was that we all assumed that all their meetings were as bad as the one that you found. Please don't think we are calling you on it - I certainly wasn't. I was just stunned that they allowed that to happen. Never in a million years did I think you were even slightly bending the truth Xx