Bogie

I am a stay at home mom who has been drinking earlier and earlier. It needs to stop. I have gained 40 pounds and hate this cycle if feeling bad, looking bad and not being present for my family. What is the void and how do I fill it?

least

to SR! Do you have any support in real life? Family or friends? What about AA or another recovery program? Stopping drinking is simple but not easy. You just don't take that first drink. Do that every day. Living sober is wonderful and worth the effort.


I'm glad you joined our family.

Ghostlight1

I started drinking earlier and earlier, too. All day benders. I, too, would suggest a support group before things get out of hand, and if you're anything like me, they will.

Welcome to the forums here. You can always come here for support.

Best to you.

Skye2

kmacksax

Hello Bogie,
i am glad you posted, i have not posted until now! i have found some comfort in reading posts on soberrecovery.com these last few days... i find there is sincerity here and though i have been around trying to stay sober for many years i have experienced a genuine realisation that i am not the only one who is suffering from what feels like an utterly hopeless situation. That is something i can be great full for right now as getting the poison out of our system is not exactly happy days.

you encouraged me to write something ..... my young sister became a Mom last week, i have a loving family that worry about me and i live in a different country, i like you want to be there for others even though i do not have a family of my own, i want to be a better man. i want to stop this vicious cycle i am on of relapse after relapse after relapse.

its frightening me but i am not alone! Hope you get something like i have out of sober recovery!

FourSeasons

Welcome Bogie! You will find great advice here!! Glad you stumbled upon us!!!

firstymer

Welcome to both kmacksax and Bogie. I am glad you are here with us. You will find a lot of support and advice from the good people here. They have helped me stay sober since the day I found this website. I wish the same for you both. Good luck to you both.

anchorbird

Welcome, and know you are NOT alone! I am pretty much a SAHM (only work 2 days a week) and I was on the same path as you. I also gained 40 pounds during my drinking career and at 23 days sober I have already lost 5 of those just by not drinking.

You CAN do this, yes it will be hard, yes it is scary to think that booze won't be there to comfort you anymore, but you CAN DO IT!

WhoDey

Bogie and kmacksax ... welcome to both of you. Having the courage to post and reach out for help is a big step.

Bogie ... it's normal to be scared at Day 1. Assuming you've been in the embrace of alcohol for an extended period of time, it's natural to feel scared when you step into the unknown. I'm only on Day 14 and I still feel uneasy. Take the time to read what others share here ... and post as moved. There is a tremendous amount of support here.

Razorback

Welcome, Bogie! This is a nice safe place to get started. If it's Day 1, you may not be feeling wonderful ;-). Well, we all know how that is! Make sure to be very kind to yourself today...if you're foggy or hungover, treat yourself like you're getting over the flu. Light food, lots of water, a nap if you can. And if you can, get any remaining alcohol out of the house. Today, just concentrate on feeling better -- which you will tomorrow!

There are a lot of online resources in addition to this one. SMART Recovery has lots of articles and exercises to read and do...it's based on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. There's Women for Sobriety (I think it takes a few days to sign up and find a meeting though), SOS (Secular Organization for Sobriety), Lifering, and cryingoutnow.com (Booze-Free Brigade).

If you want to try AA, you might look for a women's-only meeting...a lot of ladies are more comfortable there. There are even some just for moms. Another thing that's helped me is attending Weight Watchers meetings. Although it's not alcohol-specific, it's a place to meet healthy-minded people -- mostly women -- who can provide a lot of support. There are some that are free, I think Food Addicts Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous.

Check and see if there are any meetup.com events for moms in your area. Even though you may not feel like going out, it's essential not to isolate at a time like this. At least where I live, there are a bunch of meetups for moms walking, doing playgroups, specific outings. Make sure it's not a playgroup at a private home with "refreshments" though!!

Good luck! Come here whenever you're feeling shaky.

newgirl1969

Welcome! I too am a SAHM and have been trying (as of last week) to stop drinking as well. I also realized that these extra pounds I've been trying to lose are empty calories from the alcohol. I haven't been in this group long, but I will tell you that so far, I've received wonderful advice and uplifting words from the people here. And yes, it is scary to admit that you need help, but that is the first step.

Carlotta

to SR Bogie. You will find a lot of support here. Why don't you you start your sober journey by joining us at the 24 hours club where we commit not to drink or drug for the next 24 hours? It's a fun way to hold ourselves accountable in a supportive thread and before you know it, all those 24 hours do add up
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post4276544

Bogie

Thank you all for the welcome and advice. I have not told anyone about my problem even though I am sure they all know. I am going to find some support group because I know I need the help. I just feel so ashamed and embarrassed. I am sure I have damaged my liver and kidneys but have been avoiding my doctor. Thanks again for all your encouragement.

HeadLump

There's no need to feel ashamed and embarrassed, Bogie. Instead, feel proud that you're facing up to a problem that so many others would deny

If you're anything like me, you'll find that the benefits of sobriety become apparent very early on and are extremely motivating. Here's to the birth of a new and happier you

liberated

WELCOME! Yay for day 1!!!! Another mom here who has decided it had to stop- and it did- but only a few short weeks ago. We can do this- one day at a time!!!

Leana

Welcome- I was exactly where you were at on August 1, 2008. A stay at home mom very worried about how much of my day was spent either thinking about drinking, regretting drinking, or actively drinking. I hated myself, hated the lousy mother I was becoming, and didn't know how to stop.
Take it one minute, one hour, and one day at a time. I've been sober 5+ years, I can't say it was easy, or that my life suddenly got wonderful and exciting but I've never regretted quitting.

NevarCiots

Hi Bogie! I too am getting to work on day 1. I wasn't feeling too hot earlier because of ANOTHER night filled with lager and nothing else.

Let's remind ourselves what waking up not dehydrated and having an appetite feel like again. Those were always my favorite part.

Welcome!

Dee74

Welcome Bogie
As you can see a lot of folks have faced the difficulties of being at home.

I think finding support and changing your routine around can really help.

Have you seen our Moms thread?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-6-a-9.html

D