Copycat512

Good morning from Boston,

I have had a Vic habit for 3 years, anywhere from 5 to 40 mg. a day. I quit last November and began using again in January 2013. I have a legitimate pain problem about 5% of the time. The rest of the time I just really really like opiates.

So just started Day 5. I was able to taper a bit at the end so my withdrawals have been minimal. My biggest step was telling my doctor on Friday that I am an addict and he can't give me any more Vics. I feel good about this, and also miserable.

I had a love affair with my addiction. Every aspect of it. The thrill of picking up a full scrip, the way they look and taste, the first one in the morning in the car on the way to work. Everything.

Does anyone else feel so much sadness about giving them up? I never bought illegally and probably could have kept lying and taking them without much remorse. I just know it was the right thing to do. I feel like I don't have them to look forward to now.

J.

Bruce292

Having that conversation with your doctor is a huge step. I think that's really important.

I've dealt with opiate/opioid addiction twice in my life. For me, in both cases, it was a very misguided attempt to quit drinking. It worked for a short time but I came hopelessly dependent on them. The second time I quit I knew it was the last time. I got *so* sick that I swore I'd never do them again. That being said there was a period where I felt like I'd lost my best friend. The drug is tricky and it lies. It over exaggerates how good it was to be doing opiates. I quickly forgot the down side of being controlled, being exhausted, being afraid of running out, etc.. For me the sense of loss DID go away! It took a while but now I can look back on it and just shake my head.

Hang in there. Be well and be kind to yourself.

dizzychainsaw

In my experience, pain pills have been the hardest thing for me to give up. It's very hard at first but it does get better. It's kinda like breaking up with a girlfriend or boyfriend, to me. Telling myself that I would just take a couple of pain pills has caused me many relapses. You did good by telling your doctor that you're an addict. In my experience, I'm better off without them.Taking just one sets off the vicious cycle.

Copycat512

Thank you Bruce. I am anxious to move away from the sense of loss. I almost feel like I'm in mourning, it's kind of pathetic.

I love that you said the drug is tricky and it lies. I need to be enemies with Vicodin after years of friendship. xo

Copycat512

Dizzy, so funny, in conversation on Friday I likened this feeling to breaking up with a boyfriend. My doctor commented that it sounds like my relationship with the pills was the strongest one in my life which is in-freaking-sane considering I have wonderful friends, a husband of 26 years and two gorgeous daughters. Crazy stuff. xo

Skye2

Just googled Vicodin as hadn't heard of it. Seems it's not licensed in the UK.

Skye2

Ah ok - thanks Tom

Cascabel

Look up hydrocodone, I think that Vicodin is a brand name.

Pamel

Well I have had legitimate script for all these things (did not know at the time that they were addictive - duh) or that after the initial week of "highs" you would start to need more and more, to say nothing of taking two to feel EVEN better.

Yes, you are right-it is like giving up a relationship. I do believe if there was truth in it and no consequences (hmm. there was a TV show named that-showing my age!) I might still take it.

here is what Vicodin is: "Vicodin contains a combination of acetaminophen and hydrocodone. Both medicines are pain killers. Hydrocodone is an opioid pain medication. An opioid is sometimes called a narcotic. Acetaminophen is a less potent pain reliever that increases the effects of hydrocodone."

Actually the real danger is the acetaminophen which builds in your system.

Here there is also Hydrocodone which was supposed to be a less potent version, but it has been so alarmingly abused it has just been moved from a level 3 to level 2 of controlled substances.

Dee74

Hi Copycat

My drugs were different, but I think most of us feel a wrench, if not a sadness when we give them up - for me drugs and booze were the longest relationship I had of my life, outside family.

It might be rough for a little while, but you'll change now - for the better - and you'll look back at this as a major positive turning point...I'm sure of it

welcome to SR
D

Copycat512

Pamel -- I'm old enough to remember truth or consequences too

longbeachone

Wow, that's amazing...they give them out like candy here in the US.

I have a chronic pain condition called reflexive systemic dystrophy, and I have to wear a fentanyl patch to deal with the pain. I've never felt addicted to it though. It doesn't seem to have much affect on my brain (I've taken oxycontin though, which did make me feel very wasted...
Had to stop taking it right away). I've heard fentanyl is supposed to be so much stronger than other meds too. Weird. Does anyone have experience with this?

Congratulations on telling your doctor...that's awesome.

deeker

Good for u!

Copycat512

Dee, thank you so much for being sure on my behalf. I am still very unsure so I need the help! xo

Anna

I'm glad you decided to stop using the Vicodin and I hope your day goes well.