Mags1

Hi, I've been sober for 14 weeks this Saturday. My story is probably like so many people.
I'm not proud of what I did but somehow couldn't stop the booze. I look now with clarity and see how I needed that 'crutch' through my life. I stopped when my husband and I had an almighty row ending in him leaving me.
That act stopped me in my tracks, I looked at my life, h had wanted me to stop for a long time but I realise it has to be for me first and foremost and I didn't have that high opinion of myself so I had enjoyed me and the bottle.
After a lot of soul searching I decided to get tough with me, yes my body craves a drink, but no, I have indulged it for many years, and enough is enough! So, I am sober, and the feeling is good, no more hangovers, no showing myself up, no next morning concerns about whether I can drive or not, no wondering when it is ok to have my next drink!
My husband and I reconciled but I have a lot to prove to myself and also my h. I'm sure he thinks I will sway, I stopped once before for eight months but started again. I really don't know how he put up with me for these years, but he did.
It's not perfect, but I seem to have a lot more time on my hands, that I can remember, nowadays.
I'm looking into starting swimming but just can't seem to make that first step.
Can anyone give me any pointers as to what next, please?

workoholic

Congratulation! You're way ahead of me, lots of more experienced people around here, they'll give you advice shortly I am sure.

hayley86

Welcome Mags1, congratulations on your sober time. You will find tons of support and advice here. Glad you have joined us.

least

to SR! Congrats on fourteen weeks sober! I'd be looking for positive ways to fill my time. One thing that's always good is volunteering somewhere. A women's shelter, an animal shelter, a soup kitchen. Can be anything. Giving of yourself can do you some real good, not to mention the recipients of your volunteering.

PippoRossi

Hi, Mags. Glad you're here! I spend time on these forums and comment on people's posts in hopes that I am, even in some small way, helping them. It feels good. That's how I give of myself at the moment.

Mags1

Thanks, I have been reading other peoples experiences and was a bit shy to comment when I wanted to, but it's good to hear what is said and I think I can learn from others and hopefully in turn be able to one day be a help myself. I do voluntary dog walking at the weekend .
I'm wondering what to say when we go out at Christmas when I don't drink. I've managed to keep my problem mostly a secret except to a small few people. So, all around me drinking I will be on tonic water, which I enjoy very much, and I can drive everywhere, what do I say to work mates etc at Christmas lunches or just say nothing.

Jeni26

Mags, I wouldn't start worrying about Christmas just yet. That's a couple of months away, and your strength and confidence will have grown by then.

Social occasions can be tricky especially with people you used to drink with. I avoided situations like this completely for a few months until I felt strong enough to hold my head up and say ' no thanks' when offered one. That day will come for you. In the meantime just keep going. Everything gets easier in time x

Mags1

Thanks Jeni we don't do a lot of socialising but went on holiday last month and to be fair, although I didn't ask him, when we went out for a meal my husband had soft drinks with me, which I thought was nice but to be fair I didn't miss the booze, that was a first for me tho, on vacation without alcohol, it was fun. I mentioned Christmas as a friend at work has invited me to a girlie meal after work at Christmas and said her husband would give me a lift home if I wanted. I said I would be driving, it's ok thanks, so it hot me wondering about christmas, but yes it's a while off yet.

MythOfSisyphus

Welcome, Mags1! I'm glad you're having success with sobriety. The longer you do it the more natural it will become. Eventually you won't feel awkward or embarrassed by telling friends why you're not drinking.

Yes, you do have to want to do it for yourself. But it's smart to take that step back and realize what you have to lose. Your hubby has tolerated your drinking up to this point, so don't push it!

It's good to hear things are well.