Sulu1

I'm 4 days sober after I relapsed after a month. I'm starting full time work on Monday for the first time in my life an I've signed a rent contract for a year.

I'm just having a hard time today and so afraid of the repercussions of if I mess it all up :/ I feel like all my family expect me to as well and it's so difficult.

I think I need to go back to aa for some face to face support as I'm so stressed out atm

Skye2

Why worry about something that may never happen I think it's normal to feel a little apprehensive, when you're starting a new job, but you KNOW you can stop drinking - you've done a month and this time you have even more incentive.

You'll be fine

Twinings

I'd take up as much support as possible... that's a lot of big steps! and you will be able to do it but reach out to whoever you can!
Personally, not ready for work, I know i'd relapse or end up sectioned again, but i've never reached out like this before.
I think the job centre can offer some extra support if you speak to them about your problems too, there are a lot of schemes you can get into, at the end of the day they want you to keep your job!

Sulu1

Thanks Skye you are right. It's only me who can make it happen, I just wish I trusted myself a little more!

ScottFromWI

Don't view it as a hindrance, it's stability. A full time job and a place to live to call your own? That's fantastic. If you think AA will help even a little, absolutely go back. And lastly, if you don't drink today that's all that matters. Go to a meeting, go to work, don't drink - easy right?

Sulu1

Thanks Scott, I know I can do this. I often hold all these thoughts in so this time I'm trying to get as much out in the open as possible. I think aa could really help me. There are loads of meetings in my new area too.

Croissant

My best advice is to be as honest with yourself as you can. I've just slipped, moved house...work pressures ....no excuses, but I'm in a bad place...plan, ask for for help, be honest.

My blessings for your new life.xx

Sulu1

Yeah I guess this is life and everyone has those same pressures. I have support and as long as I utilize it I can do it because I've done it before.

Just had a bit of a bad moment there I think, thinking a bit more clearly now.

KateL

Good luck and go to your support group, it always helps xxx

Dee74

I always lived in the future - what if this happens, where will I be in a year or ten years, what if I'm not good/brave/strong enough...

one thing recovery has taught me is live in the day - thats not to say don't make plans - but don't freak out over things that haven't even happened yet.

Today is the only day we can do anything about

you got the job - that means your employers have faith in you - and so does your family, your friends and all of us here.

cut yourself some slack - and stay sober.
You'll be on the top of your game then Grind

D

Pondlady

Grind, Congrats on four days....you're doing great

Mrbeagle

Keep going grind

Notmyrealname

Sober, new job, new place to live -- sounds like you have a lot of stuff going great right now. Just stick with what's working, keep on the straight. You're doing good.

ZeldaFan

I know you can do it! Whenever you start to feel overwhelmed or freaked out, just come here and post. We will be here to talk you down

Correy

Do it - that AA bunch offers a great support.

As far as the future, IMHO there isn't "the future" just many different possible futures, and each one of them is being created by our actions today...

I'm sure you'll be able to create one of the better future outcomes coming your way.

Good luck!!

Nuway2fly

Hey, Grind. It's natural to be apprehensive about this big step in your life. But you're right--this is life. I have every confidence that you will do well. You just have to live it to prove it to yourself. Best wishes, and do what you need to do to protect your sobriety.

Sulu1

Pfff I am so anxious right now about everything. I can't seem to switch off the thoughts spiralling in my head. Does anyone have any relaxing recommendations? I've been for a walk but just keep wanting to burst into tears. Is it good to cry and let it out?

Bird615

Crying works for me. Then I can pick myself up and carry on.

One foot in front of the other, one day at a time. That's all you have to manage.

wehav2day

Ain't no shame in crying, and it can help let off steam. It's sure better than a hangover!

Renarde

Get some face to face support. What about a counselor? Try and stay focused on what you have to do today.