Hi
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Hitchin- UK
Posts: 1
Hi
I guess like many others I'm not sure where to start, what my problems actually are or what to say
Then again I guess many others know exactly what to say, what the problem is and indeed what they want to and are going to do about it.
I did think I knew what I was going to type before joining, but then I read what others have to say and I think this has confused. So many seem so worse off and some don't have the support that I have. I hold down a good job, have a great family and a pretty wide range of friends. Trouble is most of my life revolves around drinking, be that at home or if going out. Life to me has always been one big party. I have done stupid things, upset people etc. Its always been shrugged off with the good old "Dont worry, you where just pissed, we all do it"
I have always (from the age of 16 ish) gone out (or stayed in) and got wasted on drink and drugs every weekend, I also drunk smaller amounts a couple of times during the week. Over time, the going out, getting totally smashed calmed down, I still do it from time to time though. Trouble is I know drink at home 2 or 3 bottles of wine or 3Ltrs of strong cider or 1 bottle of vodka 4/5 sometimes 6 nights a week. I still get up and function, I go to the gym (not very fit though) and have good job that pays all the bills and lets me live a decent life.
Of late though I am becoming increasingly scared, scared of dying and leaving my family early due to my selfish drinking habits. I'm 41 now and Im drinking as much as ever. I never (to my knowledge) physically crave drink, but of late (well if Im honest the last 2 maybe 3 years) I seem to always have what I can only describe as a bruising feeling under my ribs, Im also getting alot of rashes on my legs as well. Thing is as I type I couldnt think of life without getting drunk or high ever again, I dont think I even want that life if I am 100% honest. At the same time I no I cant go on like this. Its a selfish want for a buzz that makes me drink and there is always a reason by it a golf day, a footballl match, people round, a bbq, hell I even prefer watching films and listening to music when drunk. Is this too much waffle too soon? Sorry if so. I guess I really need to get all this down in the hope I can read it back and gleen something, anything from it.
Then again I guess many others know exactly what to say, what the problem is and indeed what they want to and are going to do about it.
I did think I knew what I was going to type before joining, but then I read what others have to say and I think this has confused. So many seem so worse off and some don't have the support that I have. I hold down a good job, have a great family and a pretty wide range of friends. Trouble is most of my life revolves around drinking, be that at home or if going out. Life to me has always been one big party. I have done stupid things, upset people etc. Its always been shrugged off with the good old "Dont worry, you where just pissed, we all do it"
I have always (from the age of 16 ish) gone out (or stayed in) and got wasted on drink and drugs every weekend, I also drunk smaller amounts a couple of times during the week. Over time, the going out, getting totally smashed calmed down, I still do it from time to time though. Trouble is I know drink at home 2 or 3 bottles of wine or 3Ltrs of strong cider or 1 bottle of vodka 4/5 sometimes 6 nights a week. I still get up and function, I go to the gym (not very fit though) and have good job that pays all the bills and lets me live a decent life.
Of late though I am becoming increasingly scared, scared of dying and leaving my family early due to my selfish drinking habits. I'm 41 now and Im drinking as much as ever. I never (to my knowledge) physically crave drink, but of late (well if Im honest the last 2 maybe 3 years) I seem to always have what I can only describe as a bruising feeling under my ribs, Im also getting alot of rashes on my legs as well. Thing is as I type I couldnt think of life without getting drunk or high ever again, I dont think I even want that life if I am 100% honest. At the same time I no I cant go on like this. Its a selfish want for a buzz that makes me drink and there is always a reason by it a golf day, a footballl match, people round, a bbq, hell I even prefer watching films and listening to music when drunk. Is this too much waffle too soon? Sorry if so. I guess I really need to get all this down in the hope I can read it back and gleen something, anything from it.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,497
Welcome!
It's hard to make a decision to stop drinking, but I know for sure that you need a lot of motivation to make it work. So, I hope that you make that decision for yourself.
Alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will get worse unless you stop. If you have been having pain under your ribs for 2 to 3 years you really need to talk to your dr and find out what's going on.
It's hard to make a decision to stop drinking, but I know for sure that you need a lot of motivation to make it work. So, I hope that you make that decision for yourself.
Alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will get worse unless you stop. If you have been having pain under your ribs for 2 to 3 years you really need to talk to your dr and find out what's going on.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,424
Hi SteveJ and welcome;
I think you are smart to pay attention before things get too bad. You don't think you have a physical dependence, but have you ever stopped drinking entirely for any length of time? It sounds as though you may have a physical dependence from what you've said, but stopping on your own can be dangerous.
I suggest you go to your doctor and tell him what you told us, and ask for help in stopping drinking. He can give you meds to ease it, and monitor that you do it safely. I foolishly went cold turkey on my own without any medical support and got extremely sick in withdrawal. Like you, I have job, kept it pretty much together, and didn't think I would have much trouble stopping. I planned to stop for 6 months just to clear my head and really see how much alcohol was in control of my life. I'm so glad I did, but the first few weeks were rough. Best of luck in your journey.
In the end, by the way, I found so much more joy and meaning in sobriety that I never want to drink again. Life can be very good without the booze-colored glasses.
I think you are smart to pay attention before things get too bad. You don't think you have a physical dependence, but have you ever stopped drinking entirely for any length of time? It sounds as though you may have a physical dependence from what you've said, but stopping on your own can be dangerous.
I suggest you go to your doctor and tell him what you told us, and ask for help in stopping drinking. He can give you meds to ease it, and monitor that you do it safely. I foolishly went cold turkey on my own without any medical support and got extremely sick in withdrawal. Like you, I have job, kept it pretty much together, and didn't think I would have much trouble stopping. I planned to stop for 6 months just to clear my head and really see how much alcohol was in control of my life. I'm so glad I did, but the first few weeks were rough. Best of luck in your journey.
In the end, by the way, I found so much more joy and meaning in sobriety that I never want to drink again. Life can be very good without the booze-colored glasses.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 1,730
Welcome to SR, Steve. If you decide that you want to quit drinking, the people here will provide a great deal of helpful advice and support. I have been sober for 55 days, the same number of days that I have been here at SR. It is by far the longest period of sobriety in my adult life.
Like you, I have a successful career and a good network of friends and family. But my drinking had increased to the point where I was placing all of those things in serious jeopardy. I was also feeling worse from the alcohol (guilt, anxiety, hangovers, physical ailments) than I was getting benefit from the alcohol.
For me, before I could get better, I had to realize first that I was not well. That meant admitting I am an alcoholic - even if I am only brave enough for now to admit it to these kind strangers here at SR, and to myself.
Good luck. And welcome. I am glad you are here with us.
Like you, I have a successful career and a good network of friends and family. But my drinking had increased to the point where I was placing all of those things in serious jeopardy. I was also feeling worse from the alcohol (guilt, anxiety, hangovers, physical ailments) than I was getting benefit from the alcohol.
For me, before I could get better, I had to realize first that I was not well. That meant admitting I am an alcoholic - even if I am only brave enough for now to admit it to these kind strangers here at SR, and to myself.
Good luck. And welcome. I am glad you are here with us.
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: NC
Posts: 1,462
Welcome Steve! For not knowing what to say, you sure said a lot! You sound like me and pretty much eveyone else here who became obsessed with alcohol and couldn't stop.
You have found the right place. And it is possible to live life without alcohol.
You have found the right place. And it is possible to live life without alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wales UK
Posts: 859
Try not drinking for say six months or a year ! Wait until you no longer feel the need if your angry giving up you will find it difficult to fill the void if you just give up for the sake and find it easy your boredom threshold will find something the question is what.
Once you see that your time is yours and not the bottles it'll help. Most here still have cravings and even fantasies about being able to drink like others but we can't, and when we really see what we have instead the pure joys of sobriety might just keep you going.
See how it goes.
John.
Once you see that your time is yours and not the bottles it'll help. Most here still have cravings and even fantasies about being able to drink like others but we can't, and when we really see what we have instead the pure joys of sobriety might just keep you going.
See how it goes.
John.
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