Jackie38

I went to a meeting at the end of day 4 on Friday. I made it through the newcomer introductions. There were 2 speakers and their stories were insightful and inspiring. However..... When it came time to hand out the chips, I started crying and couldn't stop. What an embarrassment. I wish I had looked up what to expect before I went in there. I'm sure I made an ass of myself.... I bolted immediately following the meeting. Are you supposed to stick around afterwards? Ha! I think I'm too embarrassed to go back to that group. Better find a meeting in another county, state or country.

PoppiesInJuly

Good for you for getting up the guts to go. I haven't been to a meeting yet. I know about the chips and I fully expect to cry too. I am pretty sure that is extremely common! I don't think you should feel embarassed. On the contrary you should be very proud. I am sure if you would have stayed you would have received a lot of encouragement and even hugs.

Poppies

wiscsober

Good for you! Congratulations!

No disaster here...move along....chalk it up as a spiritual experience...one of many you will experience.

I don't think there is a guideline for crying.

I have seen many people crying in meetings...myself added...

I left in the middle of an alanon meeting cause I couldn't stop.

I think people appreciated your show of emotion.

courage2

Jackie, congratulations both on your sober days & on getting to a meeting.

It's really common to cry -- men and women, both those who are new and even old-timers on occasion. Sometimes I think I must not be taking the program seriously, because I haven't cried enough lol!

But really, everyone understands, and I'm sure that if you go back to that meeting, you'll be welcomed with open arms.

foolsgold66

Aaaaaaw, don't worry a bit. When you go back to that meeting and manage to chat a little before\after I'm sure you'll hear that has happened many times before.

Sobersunshine

Jackie, you have nothing to be embarrassed about! Crying is quite common at the meetings I've been to.

At a recent meeting, a tough,tattooed, every-other-word-is-**** guy started crying when he talked about how he used to be a racist and now, through the fellowship, he had learned that people are people and to accept and love everyone. Well, when he was done, pretty much half the room was in tears.

Tears are an emotional release, and the rooms are a safe place to be with others who understand, a safe place to cry and feel true emotion.

I cried through my entire first meeting.

I cried when I got my year medallion, and my sponsor did too.

A bunch of babies, we are. Lol.

Go back to the meeting, I'm sure you will be more than welcomed its open arms and a box of tissues.

ReadyAndAble

I bet they all knew exactly how you felt. You're doing a scary, brave, difficult, wonderful thing for yourself. That's hardly a disaster—in fact it's the opposite.

MsJax

Congratulations on getting sober & helping yourself . There is no need to be embarrassed, don't judge yourself! Keep doing what it takes to be sober

soberhawk

It is not that bad to cry – and those AA folks have probably seen worse, if this is enough to shake them then you should find another group.

You seem to have good sense of humor, you will be fine.

sugarbear1

Jackie, I've witnessed so many people who break down in a meeting over the years. Please let that embarrassment turn into humility and vulnerability, which means you are on the right road to recovering and doing it well. We've all been there at some point. I still cry when I read certain parts of the big book or even when I read the 9th step promises as they have come true for me. Once, I sat in darkness and could see no light......

Today, I live in the light and I can feel my emotions and I can even ask for help from others!

Welcome home!!!

Big hugs and Love sent your way!

Keep coming back! We need you sober!

Maribell

Its a very emotional time,, i cried through my first 3.. totally understandable,, and very accepted. For me it was an emotional journey,, finally accepting that this is very i needed to be.

DNVR

I've definitely walked to my car after meetings with tears running down my face and I can't think of a time when I haven't welled up in a meeting either. I chalk it up to the program working. Now I just have to stick to it!

You're not alone. Have a great day.

DNVR

LadyBlue0527

Hi Jackie, don't feel bad about breaking down. Sobriety is an emotional journey. I cried with relief when I picked up my white chip. I get tears in my eyes when I watch others pick up theirs.

I get teary eyed every time I walk up to pick up my next chip and still get teary eyed when others do too.

It can be overwhelming and it's important that you let yourself feel it. There's a lot of stuffed down emotions that have been hidden and you're dealing with them.

Nothing embarrassing about that, in fact, I think it's beautiful

veryready

I think it just shows you are ready. I can guarantee yours were not the first tears shed in that room, and they won't be the last. Sorry you are embarrassed, but don't give it a second thought. They want you there tears or no tears. They understand.

DoubleDragons

Jackie, I have cried at several AL-anon meetings (haven't tried AA meetings yet) and I have seen several people cry. I read once that tears are our body's release valves. It feels good to have a good cry and just let it all out. I heard my 6'4" inch, ex-marine manly-man employer sniffling in his office the other day. (it was 9/11 and he was reading about the 9/11 coverage) Lose the shame, accept the love!!

Threshold

Every meeting I've ever attending had boxes of tissue on the table, because people cry. It's part of being honest. That's why we come. There is no shame in crying at a meeting, it happens quite regularly, men and women both.

Jackie38

Thanks to everyone. I am still mortified as I am not a pretty tear shedder. One of the speakers said "booze ain't my problem". And I think he was right. My self doubt is my problem. Wine is just an unnecessary mask I put on to hide that self doubt.

Mizzuno

Crying is a perfect release of emotions. When I went to AA after my last drinking experience, I cried uncontrollably. I was a mess. People understand and know exactly where you are emotionally. Do not let those tears stop you from getting the help that you need. The further you walk into this journey, the stronger you will become.

Mountainmanbob

dayover

I bawled fora good portion of my first meeting.
And I mean that really fun, ugly crying. Snot dripping everywhere.

And they still welcomed me back the next time. It's okay to be vulnerable there. Don't beat yourself up about it