Skye2

is wrong with me

orieme

What happened? Did you stumble? If so, don't beat yourself up too badly. We've all stumbled on occasion and probably will again but we get back up and carry on.

If it was easy we'd have done it long ago and places like this wouldn't exist, it's hard but you're strong enough to do it.

Skye2

I can't seemto get past 4 weeks

orieme

I'm only on day 22 myself so maybe a more experienced person can offer some advice too.

Four weeks is great, don't think otherwise for a second. My attempts would usually last days. 4 Days and then relapse, I was too embarrassed to say how many Day 1's I'd had when I posted here recently.

What do you think causes you to stumble at four weeks?
Is there a regular event that occurs which causes you to relapse? Pay day drinks or similar?

Also, if you're convinced you're going to fail after a certain point in time I'm sure you'll find a way to make it happen.

soberclover

I'm thinking there may be some type of pattern too. Are you psyching yourself up for failing after 4 weeks? May be you could make a solid plan for that particular weekend....if the weekend is the relapse time. Change it up a little...try something different. Don't give up!

advbike

Skye, I did that so many times... made it 3 or 4 weeks... and what I eventually figured out is that after about 30 days I was feeling better, more normal, so I began to forget how bad I felt when drinking. Also my AV would tell me if I could do 30 days I didn't have a problem. So the little temptations would come along and I would cave - the resolve just wasn't there. Then back to square one again.

People talk about having to want it bad enough, but I also think the key is to have a support network to lean on (post before you slip!) which also serves as a reminder of how bad it can be. The SR forum helps me in that way and AA of course provides that for many people, as well having as the 12 step process to work out the emotional pain and resentments. I suggest you try to figure out what caused the relapse and go from there.

pinkdog

Hi Skye, welcome. It is very freeing to accept that you cannot drink. Very best to you. Stick around. This is a great place.

Oldselfagain

Skye first of all great job at 4 weeks. I used to be like that, but I never made it past 2 weeks!
The excellent thing is you're aware of your pattern. Now you can figure out what made you slip and change it for good.

neferkamichael

Skye, make it a goal to get past 4 weeks. Rootin for ya.

Nuudawn

It took me a long time to absorb in my bones that I needed to know what life was like withut alcohol in it. Thereare plenty of people in this world who do not turn to alcohol in need. I have finally realized that I cannot turn to alcohol in need. I have to find news ways to cope and deal with life. As long ad I need to drink I cannot. And in contemplating that thought...I can't drink when I figure I need to....Im hard pressed to come up with a reason why I would.

Skye2

Thanks for the replies everyone. Now back on track and day 7.
I think that yes, I probably was seeing 'a month' as an achievement and was rewarding
myself, though I'm still at a loss as to remembering how/why I went and bought the darn stuff.

Still, through the nastiness of the first week now, so will cling to the forum at the next 4 week milestone
Thanks again x

TexasMichael

Glad you made it back to Day 7 Skye!

The tricky part about recovery is we start to feel so good we think everything is under control and that we deserve a couple of drinks. Funny how that overrides the mental anguish that follows.

My last relapse cost me 3 1/2 years. You got back on track much sooner.

I don't ever want to feel as bad as I felt on Day 1 again.