Yogurt and dreaded moments
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Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 3,777
Yogurt and dreaded moments
The moment inevitably happens when you are at the store, and you see out of the corner of your eye a former co-worker who works for the Boss that fired you when you lost your mind on a plane. (like my run on sentence. It was written in one breath)
Yes, that moment has finally happened for me. So, I decided to try to hide behind a 3 inch pole. I thought if I stood really still that I would not be seen at all. I thought I was invisible for a moment in time.
I walked to the lettuce and started to talk to it, "Hey Lettuce. That lady over there at Pete's Coffee knows more about my drunken plane ride than I probably do. Lettuce, I knew this moment would come!"
My husband was very kind the whole time as my brain went into freak out mode. Internally I was a wreck. Externally, it seemed as if I was Miss America waving to the crowd on a float. All composed and sh#t!
So, the food shopping experience sucked. I dropped a huge container of Yogurt on the floor at the self checkout. Not drawing attention to myself or anything. I still have dried up Yogurt on my clothes.
I came home and made Pumpkin Bread.
Yes, that moment has finally happened for me. So, I decided to try to hide behind a 3 inch pole. I thought if I stood really still that I would not be seen at all. I thought I was invisible for a moment in time.
I walked to the lettuce and started to talk to it, "Hey Lettuce. That lady over there at Pete's Coffee knows more about my drunken plane ride than I probably do. Lettuce, I knew this moment would come!"
My husband was very kind the whole time as my brain went into freak out mode. Internally I was a wreck. Externally, it seemed as if I was Miss America waving to the crowd on a float. All composed and sh#t!
So, the food shopping experience sucked. I dropped a huge container of Yogurt on the floor at the self checkout. Not drawing attention to myself or anything. I still have dried up Yogurt on my clothes.
I came home and made Pumpkin Bread.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Aaarrrgh! Sorry you had that experience....been there and it sucks! Ugh! Even though those moments can be hard, it's great you can see the humorous side and laugh it off a bit. Don't worry, you're safe at home now - you can breathe again! Thanks for sharing, and take it easy!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Melbourne Beach, FL
Posts: 253
Yes, moments of wanting to be invisible I think have happened to all of us at some point in sobriety. 
But remember, dried yogurt and all, anyone else's opinion of you does not affect your life. And nobody has the right to judge anyone else. It's all a matter of perception.
But remember, dried yogurt and all, anyone else's opinion of you does not affect your life. And nobody has the right to judge anyone else. It's all a matter of perception.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Hi, Mizzuno.
Sounds to me like you emerged with your sense of humor intact; hate to say it, but I really enjoyed the image of you hiding behind that pole!
I know exactly how you felt. But you know what's awesome? The only things we have to be embarrassed about are in the past. Today should be a source of pride.
Sounds to me like you emerged with your sense of humor intact; hate to say it, but I really enjoyed the image of you hiding behind that pole!
I know exactly how you felt. But you know what's awesome? The only things we have to be embarrassed about are in the past. Today should be a source of pride.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 3,777
Originally Posted by escapist 
I hate that inner tremble. Trying to look cool when you really feel like just throwing up. You made it though. It's over and done and gone and finished and never to return.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Mizz - I think you did just fine. I've found out, over the years, that what I'M in a frenzy and the other person is nonchalant?
Episode #1 - I get locked up, the nurse I have to do intake with is a former coworker at the facility I stole drugs from out of the narcotics box. I was horrified, she was quite nice and never mentioned my past.
Episode #2 - I go to an ER for indigent people because of an MRSA infection and the nurse who takes care of me? She was my charge nurse when I was an RN in that ER. I blubbered out what had become of my life, and she was very supportive and kind.
I'm not saying this always happens, but my worst fears were still humiliating on my part, but what I thought the other person was thinking? Well, they didn't act like they were looking down on me.
I learned from here, many years ago to try to handle things with grace and dignity. Well, I didn't always do that (hard to do when you're being booked into jail or in the ER looking quite rough as you've been homeless). Regardless, what I thought they were thinking of me, I'm pretty sure they were wrong.
Remember - you never know what is going on in the lives of others, they may have loved ones who are A's. Besides, what others think of you is not your business - you've made HUGE progress and we are very proud of you.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Episode #1 - I get locked up, the nurse I have to do intake with is a former coworker at the facility I stole drugs from out of the narcotics box. I was horrified, she was quite nice and never mentioned my past.
Episode #2 - I go to an ER for indigent people because of an MRSA infection and the nurse who takes care of me? She was my charge nurse when I was an RN in that ER. I blubbered out what had become of my life, and she was very supportive and kind.
I'm not saying this always happens, but my worst fears were still humiliating on my part, but what I thought the other person was thinking? Well, they didn't act like they were looking down on me.
I learned from here, many years ago to try to handle things with grace and dignity. Well, I didn't always do that (hard to do when you're being booked into jail or in the ER looking quite rough as you've been homeless). Regardless, what I thought they were thinking of me, I'm pretty sure they were wrong.
Remember - you never know what is going on in the lives of others, they may have loved ones who are A's. Besides, what others think of you is not your business - you've made HUGE progress and we are very proud of you.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Grateful
Join Date: May 2013
Location: NC
Posts: 1,763
I dropped a huge container of Yogurt on the floor at the self checkout. Not drawing attention to myself or anything.
At least they didn't come on the overhead and say "clean-up on aisle 1, the recovering alkie dropped the yogurt".
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gulf Coast, Florida USA
Posts: 5,731
Originally Posted by Grungehead
At least they didn't come on the overhead and say "clean-up on aisle 1, the recovering alkie dropped the yogurt".
u must be a size 0 hiding behind a 3 inch pole. Just kidding there.
Maybe I better start eating yogurt.
Sorry, I am overtired. How r u Mizzuno? It is Good to see you!
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
That aeroplane mizzuno has retired and will only ever come back with alcohol .
Walk tall and feel proud , you work hard , you stay sober , Most people haven't had the fight or had to fight as much as you have to get the life thay want .
One day you will see that woman or your old boss and be able to say , "yes it was terribly sad back then but i haven't had a drink since and life is good "
These days those events from my past help me reach out to other people who abuse drink or might want to open up to someone about their problems , you never can tell ... i have no shame in being completely open about it and ringing out the freedom bell for those with ears to hear it
Stay strong ,
Bestwishes, m
Walk tall and feel proud , you work hard , you stay sober , Most people haven't had the fight or had to fight as much as you have to get the life thay want .
One day you will see that woman or your old boss and be able to say , "yes it was terribly sad back then but i haven't had a drink since and life is good "
These days those events from my past help me reach out to other people who abuse drink or might want to open up to someone about their problems , you never can tell ... i have no shame in being completely open about it and ringing out the freedom bell for those with ears to hear it
Stay strong ,
Bestwishes, m
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
you are a successful slim healthy yogurt eater shopping for groceries, you look nothing like the woman on the plane.
and everyone does things we are embarrassed about in public. be glad when you see these people that you are sober, not still drinking.
and everyone does things we are embarrassed about in public. be glad when you see these people that you are sober, not still drinking.
No half measures
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 424
The past is the past and you never have to be that person again.
AA promises
No matter how far down the scale we have gone we'll see our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self pity will disappear. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us
AA promises
No matter how far down the scale we have gone we'll see our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self pity will disappear. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us
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