Lando45

So its been 2 months this week that I'm alcohol free and life could be better. I've been seeing a therapist for the past 8 weeks and she is admit that I go to AA meeting 34 times a week. The problem is that I say I'm going to go but I never end up going. I guess I feel things are going so well with therapy and family support that there is no need for AA right now. Have recovering alcoholics survived without attending AA or is a must?

fini

Lando,
it's not a must.
i'm one example of doing okay without AA for years.
however: life could be better, you say. "surviving" is one thing, a better life is something quite different.
keep looking around here, you'll see all kinds of ways some survive, others live better.
and what different ways people are following/finding to improve their lives.
AA is one of them.

check out the 'Secular Connections' forum farther down on SR here, and check out the AA forum here, keep reading, see what looks like it might be helpful.

Lando45

Thanks fini

I meant to say life couldn't be better! Whoops.

I will definitely check out those sites. Thank you!

ScottFromWI

Everyone is different. Many get sober without AA, and many use AA. If your therapist is suggesting you go, maybe you could just give it a try and see. Perhaps they see that you are in need of something in addition to what you are doing already. That's what their job is -right?

jkb

I am sober without AA. There are various reasons for this but, that is neither here nor there. At first I did find that something was "missing" so I got into studying Buddhism and am about to embark on learning Spanish. In Rational Recovery JT says something to the effect of make friends with people based on common interests and not a common problem. That always stuck with me.

Jess

FeenixxRising

AA isn't necessary. But I personally took time to check out meetings, do some serious reading of the AA book and a of thinking about the 12-steps. I'm on the fence as to whether I continue with AA or not, but many people who thought AA wasn't for them found out they really liked the program.

I'd urge you to at least check out a few meetings.

Amajorityofone

I've never been to an AA meeting, or read any of their literature. I am ten days away from fourteen consecutive months of 100% sobriety. Thus, my advice would be if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

longbeachone

Reading about whether or not to go AA is a big mistake. You will hear a dozen stories, and they will all be different. Since you obviously trust your therapist, why not try to go once or twice and see for yourself? It's not that much of a sacrifice is it?

JennyMack

I have been feeling the same way about going to NA. My counselor suggested I go to as many meetings as I could when I first got clean, but I have had a hard time committing to the actual meetings. Part of this is because there are only 2 a week in my town and both nights would be hard for me to commit to (I take care of my elderly aunt and would need someone to stay with her as she is 24 hour care). I printed a lot of the literature from their website and have been reading other people's experiences, but I think what it comes down to is me. I finally joined here because after 8 months of sobriety I still feel like aside from being clean I am not working on my recovery. I've been thinking about meetings more often lately, so hopefully I will make it to one soon. I figure once I try it I can decide if it's for me or not. Whatever keeps us sober, right?

Lando45

Exactly whatever keeps his sober I like that comment. I'm not totally against a day but I do feel there are other ways to stay sober. I've been to AA meetings and I feel it's just not a good fit for me. I found a lot of success and open dialogue with my family friends and people who support my decision. To me this is my AA meeting.

ScottFromWI

I would ask your therapist why he/she suggested the meetings at least. Perhaps they see something you don't. They might also have suggestions for things other than AA if it's not your cup of tea.

Bottom line, you are paying your therapist to help you - so if they give advice to take action on something, at least find out why, right?

JadeSatellite

I haven't been to AA and I'm getting sober myself. It's up to you to go, but I agree with others here- try it out a few times, ask your therapist why, check out alternatives. We all go down a different path through our sobriety.

Jtampa

As a few others suggested, check out a meeting and see what you think. You don't have to participate, just sit back and listen. While it isn't for some people, I know of others that went in because they 'had to' and found it to be very beneficial.

In my experience the most frequently recommended meeting for newcomers is what's called a "Speaker" meeting. There is a good thread about meetings for beginners on here (I don't have enough posts to link to it or I would).

Good luck in whatever you choose.

-jtampa

Mentium

The received wisdom is that the success rate for those who go to support groups of one sort or another is better than for those who quit alone. The research is very inconsistent however from what I have seem.

From a personal perspective I am close to 50 days now and I have gone to 4 AA meetings a week. In the past few years trying on my own I have only ever managed a few isolated patches.

wakko

If everytime I tried to fix something I broke it worse, then I hired a professional to teach me how to fix things but I chose not to take their advice. This does not sound like the best course of action.

I started to get better when I gave up doing it my way

alphaomega

Jesus holy Christ !

34 times a week ? As in 5 times a day ?

Ain't nobody got time for that.

freshstart57

Lando45, I can only assume your therapist was suggesting attending meetings '3 or 4 times' a week. If you are curious about AA, and it seems you are, you might see what it's about. You can get a flavor of what goes on by reading the AA forum here, but the group support is something that has to be experienced.

As for me, I went to a few meetings, but they didn't fit well with me (or I didn't fit), so I found one of the many other approaches to sobriety to describe what I had found. If your life couldn't be better and you are resolved to never drink again, I'd spend my time doing other things than sitting in meetings.

13unluckyforsom

LOL your cracking me up today


Ain't nobody got time for that...

13unluckyforsom

And sorry to the OP. I think it's really up to you what you do - if your feeling strong enough this way then why fix what isn't broken?

least

I think the OP meant 3 to 4 times a week, not 34.