MTSlideAddict

I’m just kind of down today. Really it’s that I’m burnt out. I have been stressed and miserable lately. My job is a big one. It’s an entry level position that I’ve worked at for a little over two years. I took this job due to my previous employment of nearly ten years going out of business. It’s not a horrible job, but it’s not one that I personally enjoy. I love the company (hospital) I work for and the values that we carry. I love feeling that I helped make someone’s day less stressful by wheel chair assisting someone in need to where they need to go, or by walking them to their destinations instead of them getting lost in the hospital’s maze-like halls. Despite my vow when I was searching for jobs to never work customer service ever again here I sit, and at this entry level position I feel completely underutilized, bored, and professionally below everyone else. It hurts my self esteem and confidence. I run the information desk and answer the hospital’s main switch board. I am very good at customer service and have an extensive history with it. Why do people have to be so rude when calling in? Don’t they realize I am a person that is no better or worse than them? Don’t they realize that a simple thank you or at least not hanging up on me goes a long way? What about not telling me that I don’t know what I’m doing or calling me names when I explain the hospital’s HIPPA regulations? Even some of the doctors and nurses talk to me like I’m gum on their shoe. Not all the calls are like that - only a handful, but it still can be hurtful. Frankly, I think they should feel lucky that a live person answers the switch board instead of the usual machine these days. I’m trying not to tear up as I sit and smile at all these visitors that are coming to visit their loved ones in the hospital. I’m feeling sick of wearing this “happy” mask for everyone.

I know I’m just emotional today, and I’m just seriously having a problem dealing with the snarky remarks and the belittlement some callers are giving today. It just seems like nothing pans out. I have applied for several jobs throughout town even before I left my AH. I had one interview, but I didn’t get the position. I continue applying, but I get rejection email after rejection email. I don’t know what my HP has planned for me or what lesson he’d like me to learn, but I am completely burnt out by it all. I left my husband, and am staying with family. I am searching for peace in my life, and would like my own space to do this instead of living with family. In order to do that I need a new job, but all the jobs keep rejecting me. My AH is begging me to come home. It’s like all I want to do is scream. Stressed doesn’t even describe it. I try not to let the continued rejections get to me, but it’s tough. Then, I get mistreated by callers. I feel like going home and crying.

To top it off, my baby, my car, has scratches on it. I scraped a pillar trying to get out of the garage at work last weekend. It’s not too bad, but still. I love that car. It’s the first car I actually got to pick out without me allowing influences. It’s nothing grand or too expensive, but a humble Mazda 6. I take it to the car wash every week, and spend time washing and even waxing it when needed. That time I spend at the car wash is my “me” time. When I was living with my AH still that was my escape. AH would drink, I would wash the car. Well, I guess it still is an escape for me. It's my time to just focus and think. I am proud of the cleanliness of my car inside and out. It shines. I sanded down the scratches and polished with compound, but I still see it. I feel sad when I see the damage that I caused. I do know a few scratches on a car is not the end of the world, but everything is just adding up.

One day I know it will get better. Thanks for letting me get it off my chest. I have been going to Al-Anon. I have picked up going two days a week, and I love going now. I’m a newbie still, and am too shy to share. One day I’ll work up the courage to speak. I know that will help.

izzyrose05

I know what it's like to be unemployed. I'm a degreed professional in Michigan and went over two years on unemployment a few years back. When I did get a job for the first time after not working so long, it was well below my qualifications. It does take a toll on you. It whacks at your confidence level and you start to feel hopeless. I was stuck in the same town because of children with my Ex. But you need to make sure you do not give up! Keep filling out apps. Even if you only do two a week, something will change if you DONT GIVE UP!
Eventually, you will get the break you need IF you keep trying. But remember, no matter what job you work..unless you own your own company and even then, the likelihood of working with or dealing with people who are just not self aware is always there. There are ungrateful rude people everywhere. Nothing counters that behavior better than sharing loving kindness with those that are unable to show it to you. Keep your chin up. and good luck on the job hunt!

stella27

I am so sorry that today is a hard day. I am very proud of you for staying with family, for not giving in to AXH, and for setting your own course.

I just know that it won't always be like this. You won't be entry level for long. Your written and communication skills are excellent and you will be hired away from that position soon.

You deserve a nice walk on a pretty afternoon. Or at a minimum, a hot fudge sundae. Do something to make yourself feel better. You deserve it.