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Old 10-03-2013, 09:54 AM
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Advice...

Hi,

I have been on subs for most of this year, obtaining illegally at first, now I've been with my Dr. for about 5 months. My support system basically consists of my Dr, my Dad, and I go to some NA meetings and IOP groups, (but I have been struggling with social anxiety since I was a preteen so I don't get as much from these groups as I wish I couild), and now here in this forum. My Dr. has told me how great I am doing, he has told my Dad also. My Dad assumes he knows everything and doesn't understand why I cant just stop subs, why I'm detoxing during my taper etc, and basically expects me to function like everyone else, not like someone in recovery learning and trying to make it through ech day.
Here is where I need advice, are there any websites or booklets or brochures that aren't overwhelming but can deliver to him and maybe get through to him about the reality of recovery? I will never use again, but his constantly telling me I'm not doing enough, not good enough, really makes me wish I could go numb again... especially where he is basically the biggest support in my life right now... My husband is in jail, I may be facing jail time, I haven't had my kids at all this year and barely get to see them even tho I have been clean for most of this year.. I guess I kinda got off track here... I understand the whole it doesn't happen overnight thing, but everyone in my life expects me to be superwoman overnight and I guess the work I have done being belittled hurts.. so yeah, where is the best, easiest to digest info out there for families? He does try, he just doesn't understand. Best part is he has been an alcoholic my whole life but he won't ever admit it or see it. Actually half my family is like that. That kind of makes it harder to be judged by them, I'm horrible because I used opiates not alcohol? Sorry for ranting, just frustrated, and this taper from 8 mg to 6 mg is kicking my butt pretty good :/

Thanks fort reading my not very well thought out post
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Old 10-03-2013, 10:09 AM
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Welcome to SR! I have no info that might help your dad understand but want to welcome you to the site. Maybe the IOP groups you attend can help you find the info you want.
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Old 10-03-2013, 10:14 AM
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Just a thought, but is it possible your doctor could have a word with him, or someone that understands a bit more what you're going through?
Sometimes it takes someone else, to get people to fully understand.
x
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Old 10-03-2013, 11:07 AM
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Unfortunately my dr has talked to him and that went no where fast, except my dr havin a better understanding what i'm going through! My iop does have family meetings, but he is resistant to going :/ he thinks he knows all, unfortunately and its hard. That's why I was hopin if there was some info I could print and give to him maybe he would at least look at it. Thanks for your replies
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Old 10-03-2013, 11:16 AM
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How about showing him your post? Or have a chat in the friends and family threads and see how they've done it?
I managed to keep it all from my Dad, so I don't really have any experience
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Old 10-05-2013, 11:42 AM
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Originally Posted by SkyeSea View Post
How about showing him your post? Or have a chat in the friends and family threads and see how they've done it?
I managed to keep it all from my Dad, so I don't really have any experience
thank you I am new here and haven't had much time to browse through it all, wasn't aware there was such a thread
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Old 10-05-2013, 02:05 PM
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Hi Recovering

I'm assuming you're an adult woman
your medications and treatments should be between you and your Dr.

Your Dad doesn't have to like it, but he needs to accept that I think?

D
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Old 03-20-2014, 11:21 AM
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yes, I am an adult woman, however at the time I had lost everything, including my ability to support myself, which is where my dad came in, why I asked for resources to help him understand. Now I have a new support system, but still want to give him as much info as possible. That's why I was asking, before I needed him to understand I was trying for my survival, now, I want him to for our relationship.

1+ years "clean" (on suboxone) yay
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