Loneliness leads to relapse
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Sorry to hear that Ach. There are a lot of places you can go to meet people besides bars of course, but I think you know that already.
I personally view relapses (and I has several) as a failure of my commitment to my sobriety plan. I'd say that if you can't go to bars without drinking, then part of your plan should be to stay out of bars.
I personally view relapses (and I has several) as a failure of my commitment to my sobriety plan. I'd say that if you can't go to bars without drinking, then part of your plan should be to stay out of bars.
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
Most recently ? A scabby, crusty, gaping emotional wound rose to the surface after a month and a half of sober time.
The wound was 28 years old and decided it that it FINALLY should be safe enough to be felt, in its entirety, sober.
Turns out it couldn't.
The wound was 28 years old and decided it that it FINALLY should be safe enough to be felt, in its entirety, sober.
Turns out it couldn't.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
I used to say loneliness led to my relapses too Ach - truth was it was my inability to deal with my loneliness that lead me back time and again to the only solution I knew.
If you read back through your threads, you'll see you actually have a lot of suggestions on ways to deal with stuff and make things better now - I really hope you'll decide to use them Ach, if you're not already
D
If you read back through your threads, you'll see you actually have a lot of suggestions on ways to deal with stuff and make things better now - I really hope you'll decide to use them Ach, if you're not already
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 61
I'm a loner generally and was before I started drinking. For me, boredom is what leads to relapse. So I have to stay mindful and I stay busy. It's great you've identified a key factor, if not the key factor. Now it's all about figuring out how to handle it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,443
Originally Posted by Acheleus 
So I relapse because I have no one in my life and I go to bars for conversation and companionship.
Then I realized I was lonely because I didn't like myself so much. It took a while, but now I think I am awesome.
I don't mind being alone now.....in fact, I prefer it sometimes.
When I felt sorry for myself, that had the potential to cause a relapse for me.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,920
I am so tired even after sleeping a long time last night. I am not sure why I feel so out of energy and motivation to do anything. I am working on not masturbating to see if my energy will improve. Going for a walk them grading papers all night.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: West midlands
Posts: 54
The problem is bars are full of lonely depressed people pretending to be happy. Too many people are unemployed another factor in this and a lot of these people have bad coping skills e.g I need a drink!. I see so many people out of work in bars all day. Done it myself .
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,920
I got my haircut today and I have WHITE hair, it sucks. A lot of it. I hated myself a little more. I cannot even talk to women my age(27) because I am so embarrassed. I hate my ******* self. But I cannot drink.
No half measures
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 424
Originally Posted by sugarbear1
A person with alcoholism treats loneliness with isolation.....
Why not try an AA meeting and not feel so alone anymore?
Those 12 steps saved my life (and my loneliness).
With love and hugs,
~SB
Why not try an AA meeting and not feel so alone anymore?
Those 12 steps saved my life (and my loneliness).
With love and hugs,
~SB
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Probably my living room. Maybe my bedroom if I'm feeling lazy
Posts: 1,085
I have not relapsed because I am not doing what I was doing when I was drinking, which was isolating, feeling sorry for myself, and pushing people away because I thought they would be disgusted with me since I was disgusted with myself.
I have a few gray hairs. I'm 31. It sucks.
I also have trichotillomania so I have a few bald spots in weird place where I've pulled my hair out from anxiety. I talk to women all the time. The thing is, they usually don't care about superficial stuff like this. Especially those over the age of 25.
I have a few gray hairs. I'm 31. It sucks.
I also have trichotillomania so I have a few bald spots in weird place where I've pulled my hair out from anxiety. I talk to women all the time. The thing is, they usually don't care about superficial stuff like this. Especially those over the age of 25.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,921
I got my haircut today and I have WHITE hair, it sucks. A lot of it. I hated myself a little more.
Count your blessings.
I know a lady with no hair because she is going through chemo. I'm sure she would trade positions with you.
Count your blessings.
I know a lady with no hair because she is going through chemo. I'm sure she would trade positions with you.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
