ctrl

As I was starting to feel better, I jammed my day with tons of things, couldn't possibly get them all done, felt like a failure, and figured if I fail sober then I might as well be numb.

I went to bed instead.

SkyeSea

Hey, hang in there, you're almost over the worst

lorelei

well done not caving, I know its hard but the best is yet to come, and this bit will soon be over, hang in there ((())) x

hayley86

It gets easier. Stay strong.

Fandy

try not to shoot yourself in the foot....if you need to accomplish things, give yourself 1-3tasks, finish them then a small treat, be it a movie, food, walk, talk with friends...and you are not a failure! you are staying sober...resting, healing.

dwtbd

You can do this, the first week is the hardest it gets better sooner than you think, really.
I think I remember you said that you ran /competed in Ironman type events, if so you know you it would be impossible to train and be ready to compete in a few days.
Give yourself some time, being productive certainly helps but don't try and out do the Romans, they didn't finish their city that quick.
wish you well

SkyeSea

I always found days 3 and 5 to be the worst and reading around, that seems a pretty normal thing. (I've seen more days 3+5 than I care to remember).
Hang in there

happyhour

ctrl, good for you, it was a successful day, as long as you decided not to drink.

it may seem odd, but sometimes going to bed is the right answer.

congratulations on 5 days, that is awesome.

firstymer

Way to get through Day 5, ctrl. Well done. If getting things done during the day is a concern, rest easy. Once you get past this first week, you will be amazed at how many extra things in a day you can do, now that you are sober. Stay strong!

gatorgirl67

Way to go ctrl!! Sometimes the comfort of bed is enough to shoo away those cravings, worked for me, too!

ctrl

Thanks, everyone. Trying to remember what is important, and what isn't. Obviously I've had my priorities mixed up for a while.

It's hard for me to realize that it wasn't just drinking that was out of control, but all the things that I did to enable it. The lying, the not working, the not exercising, the isolation, the expectations not met...

I'm not drinking anymore, but I have work to do in those other areas, too. I just need to take it slowly and try not to rebuild everything in a day, or think that it will all be magically rebuilt just because I'm sober.

Thanks again.

mecanix

hey ctrl,
Bed was my fortress against alcohol for the first month of my sobriety

5 days

Bestwishes, m