Dollyangel17

At my physical yesterday, I was discussing my drinking/sobriety with her, and she asked me if I had "hit bottom".

I immediately started to say no, but then stopped for a second to consider what "bottom" really is. I suppose it can be different for everyone. I think a lot of people consider it when something horrible happens as a result of their drinking (loss of job, loss of spouse/family, being arrested etc.)

None of those particular things happened to me, but there were other things that for me meant I was hitting bottom.

Like drinking nips in the bathroom stall at work,

like driving with my daughter and having a travel mug filled with wine,

and lets not forget drinking cooking sherry out if desperation.

These are just some examples of my low points...do they qualify as "bottom"...don't really know, but whether they are bottom or not...they are places I never want to be again.

Why do some people feel we need to hit "Bottom" before we are ready to quit for good?

sugarbear1

Are you ready to stay stopped?

That is the bottom. Willingness to work on staying stopped.

Dee74

I think a lot of people feel that bottom needs to be an event - after all thats the image presented to us by the media and popular culture.

I think 'bottoms' more of a decision though - there need not be a catastrophe - finding ourselves at the bottom of a deep hole we simply decide to stop digging

D

jazzfish

In my opinion, there is only one "real" bottom and that is death. Everything is else is a decision that drinking is no longer worth the cost in pain and misery.

phoebe64

I believe that is an AA concept, and I could be wrong. And I personally believe it can be different for all of us. How low we need to get before we truly embrace the need for sobriety. I have not done many things others would consider a "bottom," but I have had serious changes to my health, in part, due to alcohol. Destrying health counts for me. But I never hid bottles, or got a DUI, or a divorce, etc... I just do not think it can be defined.

trail257

I don't like that expression. Alcoholics are a resilient bunch. If I thought in terms of hitting bottom, I would keep digging. For some people, hitting bottom is death. I don't think we need to hit the bottom for a realization that alcohol is poison for us.

Dollyangel17

I am staying stopped (almost 5 months now).

I was just wondering why she even asked it, and what SHE meant by bottom. I had told her I quit because I needed to, and that I realized my life was slipping out of my control.

I would think that would be enough of a bottom.

Melina

I was so close to the bottom that I figure the only thing left was to eventually kill people while I was driving drunk during blackouts and only finding out about it from blood on my car the next day.

I never want to hit bottom. I stopped drinking. I had too many free passes but every drinking situation got me closer to the 'bottom.'

I shudder to think of what I could be unleashing upon myself and society if I really truly wanted to hit 'bottom.'

I scared myself into sobriety. And now I walk towards recovery with a clear conscience, grateful grateful grateful I never hurt someone with all the bad choices I made drunk.

The farther I get away from drinking, the better. The 'bottom' is a sick, evil place.

You don't have to lose your family and your soul to know it's gone far enough.

suki44883

^^^^This.^^^^

Your bottom is when you stop digging. When you realize that you just cannot take one more hour of living that way. I've never understood why some people believe they have to lose everything and be almost living on the streets before they believe they have hit their bottom. I agree with Dee. For me, it wasn't an event, it was a decision.

83mama0f2

Ive never been through some of the situations defined as bottom here on SR. I don't ever want to be one of those stories. I'm very health conscious and every other aspect of my life is geared towards me being healthy and having a long life. Alcohol as a part of my life is not an option anymore. All that wonderful healthy food I eat is pointless if im consuming a bottle of wine every night. Yes.. but I hit bottom. I finally decided I was tired of being controlled by it and have made the decision to quit for good. That's my bottom.

BadCompany

"Bottom" for an alcoholic is like the tomcat screwing the skunk. He didn't get all he wanted, but he got all he could stand.

Carlotta

I ve had a few friends and acquaintances over the years whose bottom was death

stark6935

I had to really think about where I wanted my bottom to be. Could I continue until I'm homeless, have diabetes, liver failure, have no friends/family left? Sure. But I have been thinking about it a long time, and it finally pissed me off enough to decide I'm over it. I remember one defining moment was when I was drunk sitting there, and thought to myself "is this really more exciting than being sober?". I started to think to myself, and dig inside my mind about why I drank. This is different for everyone obviously.

DecBaby

Thanks for this thread. I hit more than a few of the big events people think of as bottom. Only it wasn't my bottom. I kept digging. I think I was looking for death. Digging for it and welcoming it. Its nice to see not everyone has to get to that point before they stop.

foolsgold66

Not an important medical question, IMO. I would have been angry and asked the point of the question, as if he was possibly considering whether I was worth his time and effort to treat.

chloebear

Wow, I've had many catastrophic things happen as a result of drinking, including divorce, DWI and loss of two jobs. And none of that stopped me from drinking for good. I've re-embarked on recovery (today, in fact) and I need to believe its going to take this time. I've read loads of books on addiction and recovery and made two attempts at AA (which is not a good fit for me). I've been in outpatient treatment and detoxes in countless emergency rooms and to multiple therapists and psychiatrists. I'm scared that I'm never going to get this right, and more importantly, I'm terrified that my bottom will be death. Other than alcohol, I have generally good habits (I eat healthy, run, meditate, do yoga) but I feel like all of that gets canceled out by repeated binges that leave me weak and shaky and unable to even walk my dog for fear of collapsing on the street (which has happened before). Please, any (secular) suggestion to help me prevent relapse is beyond welcome. My doctor has suggested that protracted withdrawal symptoms are likely a factor, so within the next week, I'm starting on Naltrexone. Has anyone had a successful experience with this medication?

gigi0310

Hitting bottom is so personal. When I accepted that alcohol was negatively effecting my life, that was my bottom. I didn't want to go any lower than that.

digdug

I think about bottoms sometimes.

To me, it really is an individual thing. Financial problems, ruined relationships, jail/legal issues, etc. Or even just realization of being sick and tired, defeated, and without hope.

I hate that my bottom was what it was. I hate that I know what it feels like to die. I hate that I knew I had a problem but just kept digging myself deeper down the rabbit hole.

Why couldn't I bottom out when I realized I needed to drink every day to stave off withdrawals? Or when I had to resort to drinking mouthwash?

Or seeing my credit card statements and every other charge was the liquor store.

I am envious of those who were able to recognize there bottom without such substantial repercussions.

But looking back at it now, I don't think I ever would have stopped until I reached my personal bottom, which was death. I didn't want to die.

Whiterhino24

I had really good success with Oxazepam. It numbed me out for awhile but it worked and I felt pretty good after a few days. I lived the same lifestyle as you. I was very active but drank heavily and had multiple failures at getting sober but I am not failing this time.

geno198

I think everyone has there own bottom. My bottom is different there your bottom. It just how fat are you willing to digg. Good job on your sobriety.