Am I an alcoholic?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 1
Am I an alcoholic?
Hi everyone! I'm 24, and I think I am an alcoholic.
I have an anxiety problem, and my suicidal thoughts brought me to a doctor who told me I should stop smoking weed and drink alcohol. Weed was no problem, but then I cried with the thought of not being able to drink alcohol. Because of THAT I realised that I might be an alcoholic, even though I've been so so so careful as my mom, and many of her side of the family, are alcoholics.
I stopped drinking. A few weeks later I had some last drops of this Lithuanian drink, and after that alcohol was all I thought. I got scared, and stopped with it completely. Looking back, it has been rather hard, but now I'm having fun looking for alternatives when in social events.
It has been two months, I think - I'm not counting - and I dream about drinking shots, and freaking out in my dream, that it will push me back to it. Is that common? I wake up feeling relief that I haven't done it.
I never thought I was an alcoholic, but looking back I've realised that I have been. I'm still young and was introduced to alcohol at the age of 15. I always drank ENOUGH, cause I never liked hang overs and not being in control (ie. not remembering the evening the day after). So that never happened, but in the end, everything was about alcohol. I had fear in becoming an alcoholic, but I never thought I would become one, cause "I'm better than my mother", I've seen it, I know what it does, and she will never recover, cause she has been drinking since her 16 years. If she stops, she can die. In the end - that doesn't matter, right? You are just in it, and you don't even realise it. Is that correct? You know you are doing something you shouldn't, but... "there is no problem with just that one more", "it's my life, my body, it's fine". I always had a hard time with drinking "just" one glass of wine - I would always get more.
Am I an alcoholic, right? I do not know who else to ask. I would love to hear your thoughts. I need to understand this.
I have an anxiety problem, and my suicidal thoughts brought me to a doctor who told me I should stop smoking weed and drink alcohol. Weed was no problem, but then I cried with the thought of not being able to drink alcohol. Because of THAT I realised that I might be an alcoholic, even though I've been so so so careful as my mom, and many of her side of the family, are alcoholics.
I stopped drinking. A few weeks later I had some last drops of this Lithuanian drink, and after that alcohol was all I thought. I got scared, and stopped with it completely. Looking back, it has been rather hard, but now I'm having fun looking for alternatives when in social events.
It has been two months, I think - I'm not counting - and I dream about drinking shots, and freaking out in my dream, that it will push me back to it. Is that common? I wake up feeling relief that I haven't done it.
I never thought I was an alcoholic, but looking back I've realised that I have been. I'm still young and was introduced to alcohol at the age of 15. I always drank ENOUGH, cause I never liked hang overs and not being in control (ie. not remembering the evening the day after). So that never happened, but in the end, everything was about alcohol. I had fear in becoming an alcoholic, but I never thought I would become one, cause "I'm better than my mother", I've seen it, I know what it does, and she will never recover, cause she has been drinking since her 16 years. If she stops, she can die. In the end - that doesn't matter, right? You are just in it, and you don't even realise it. Is that correct? You know you are doing something you shouldn't, but... "there is no problem with just that one more", "it's my life, my body, it's fine". I always had a hard time with drinking "just" one glass of wine - I would always get more.
Am I an alcoholic, right? I do not know who else to ask. I would love to hear your thoughts. I need to understand this.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 20
I am not sure how useful labels are, but my thinking is that if thinking of yourself as an alcoholic will help you STAY stopped, then embrace it. If labeling yourself that way just makes you feel shameful, then it is counterproductive. No matter what you, or others label you, if you wonder if you have a problem, you likely do. You are young, now is a great time to develop healthy habits.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Welcome to SR Ecco 
What stands out to me in your post is that you mentioned you have anxiety problems and suicidal thoughts. You have a good doctor and he has hit on the two things which are absolutely guaranteed to make both of those things worse. In these circumstances I think it matters very little if you are an alcoholic or not. You are investigating a better way to live and tackling other problems which would only get worse if you were drinking. Congrats to you And glad you are here because it can only be beneficial to have more support x
What stands out to me in your post is that you mentioned you have anxiety problems and suicidal thoughts. You have a good doctor and he has hit on the two things which are absolutely guaranteed to make both of those things worse. In these circumstances I think it matters very little if you are an alcoholic or not. You are investigating a better way to live and tackling other problems which would only get worse if you were drinking. Congrats to you
And glad you are here because it can only be beneficial to have more support x
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
Hi Ecco,
I can give you one set of criteria, that was shown to me. For me, it was incredible useful (maybe even essential) to realize that I drank very differently from the people around me. I have no real off switch when it comes to alcohol. Sure, there were lots of times when I could keep a lid on my consumption under the right circumstances. But there were a far greater number of times when I was unable to say enough is enough. I was the guy who when everyone is calling it a night and heading, I'm just getting started. I was the guy who would always be saying, 'just one more' for hours on end. It was rarely one more. Usually I drank to the point of being unable to drink anymore.
So that's one thing to look at. How well is your off switch working? Look at the hard evidence instead of whether or not you though you were just deciding to drink more than you planned. Do you often drink more than you plan?
The other factor I was shown was if I was able to quit or not. When I decided that alcohol was causing me problems (health, family, job, legal), was I able to quit drinking? In my case, no, not at all. So I can't control how much I drink, and I can't not drink. Those factors make me a classic alcoholic.
There is a solution, btw, and a happy ending to all of that. But understanding those truths about myself was a start to that happy ending.
I can give you one set of criteria, that was shown to me. For me, it was incredible useful (maybe even essential) to realize that I drank very differently from the people around me. I have no real off switch when it comes to alcohol. Sure, there were lots of times when I could keep a lid on my consumption under the right circumstances. But there were a far greater number of times when I was unable to say enough is enough. I was the guy who when everyone is calling it a night and heading, I'm just getting started. I was the guy who would always be saying, 'just one more' for hours on end. It was rarely one more. Usually I drank to the point of being unable to drink anymore.
So that's one thing to look at. How well is your off switch working? Look at the hard evidence instead of whether or not you though you were just deciding to drink more than you planned. Do you often drink more than you plan?
The other factor I was shown was if I was able to quit or not. When I decided that alcohol was causing me problems (health, family, job, legal), was I able to quit drinking? In my case, no, not at all. So I can't control how much I drink, and I can't not drink. Those factors make me a classic alcoholic.
There is a solution, btw, and a happy ending to all of that. But understanding those truths about myself was a start to that happy ending.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Scandinavia
Posts: 1,344
It does sound like that you have been using alcohol in a unhealthy way and it could give you a lot of problems if you continue that path.
I think it is sensible of you to be considering how you are using it.
Alcohol is not good against anxiety or depression – it gives some short term relieve, but it comes with a huge cost, it is not worth it.
Whether you can be called an alcoholic or not – it does depend on how you define it.
I think it is sensible of you to be considering how you are using it.
Alcohol is not good against anxiety or depression – it gives some short term relieve, but it comes with a huge cost, it is not worth it.
Whether you can be called an alcoholic or not – it does depend on how you define it.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: North salt lake
Posts: 3,325
I always struggle when someone asks if they are alcoholic. I'm not a doctor, I wouldn't know. What jumps out at me is your suicidal thoughts. I have been exposed to suicide. In my family. It is devastating. Families fall apart. Then comes the horrible questions for those left her, should I have?, could I have, what didn't i do, what should I have done. Being suicidal and drinking, that is more scary than I can wrap my mind around. In my humble opinion, getting wasted on anything while feeling suicidal can't end well.
Good luck and God bless.
Good luck and God bless.
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