horriblethisis

My ex had drug addiction problems, and I stayed for 25 years before pulling away and divorcing. I have since met a wonderful man, generous, funny, loving companionate, nurturing – basically everything I have ever wanted in a man, BUT…errr…I think he may have a drinking problem. I have never been involved with someone who likes to drink. I am a pretty straight edge person who doesn’t drink much, so I never really know what “abnormal drinking” looks like. Would someone please enlighten me??? Last night, he had two scotch on ice, two wines and a beer. He 6’ 3” ant 265 pounds…so he was not drunk. He states that he doesn’t have a problem, “he just likes to drink, and can hold his liquor”. I love this man, but I don’t want to be in a difficult situation again. On the other hand, nobody is perfect. Am I being a fool and just starting my co-dependency AGAIN? When is drinking a problem? Someone please help me decipher.

AnvilheadII

When is drinking a problem?

when it is a problem for YOU.

Kindeyes

In this sentence, it's not the amount he drank that concerns me......it was the bold section that would raise a red flag.

Again, the first part of this sentence doesn't concern me, the bold section does.

But overall, I think anvilheadII hit the nail on the head.

gentle hugs
ke

breath

And if YOU think YOU have a problem, you probably do. Really, with 2.5 years sober, I'd have to say that there are not too many GOOD reasons for him to drink that much. Do some homework, become familiar with Alanon. If any red flags pop up go into action. Don't be codependent. Don't enable. Recognize an excuse. Watch for progression. Ask him to stop for 5 days, see what happens. Study, read, find fellowship. Take Care, put yourself first!