Bruno1979

Hi guys,

I just can't seem to escape the grip of alcohol, I can't even consider going to local AA meetings due to my day job,

I feel as though I only need the slightest excuse to drink and then I'm off the rails for a good few weeks,

I feel really embarrassed posting this as if had lots of advice from people on here and I just can't quite seem to put more than a week or two together at any one time.

I don't know where to go from here, what will happen is I'll wake up and plod on like any other day but I really need to do something different tomorrow for mine and my families sake.

Bruno.

Serenity1972

Hi Bruno - Welcome. You have found a great place for support. This site has helped keep me sober since I decided I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. You can do this..one day at a time.

lorelei

Welcome back Bruno, one day, one hour at a time if needs be, changing your mindset...its a process. hope we can all help each other xx

dwtbd

welcome Bruno
There is only one magic bullet, quitting. How you get there is as varied as there are people.
Are there other support groups in your area ? (, assuming a specific reason to avoid AA)
This site is full of supportive people who bring lots of ideas and paths to sobriety, have you read through all the forums?
I found Rational Recovery and AVRT to be tremendously helpful, there is a thread in the secular connections on this site that describes it. I found it through a google search after seeing it mentioned here.
Post, read ,ask keep logging in this(SR) is a great start
wish you well

pinkdog

Hi Bruno, you don't have to be embarrassed here. We've all been there. Come to the chatroom and talk. Or come to the meetings there. Tues and Friday nites 9pm est. You will not feel alone if you come there. Hugs to you.

Renarde

(((Bruno)))

Why can't you attend support groups because of your job?

Mentium

Hi Bruno, I don't know where in Straffs you live, but unless you live in a very rural part surely there are evening AA meetings available. Have you checked on-line?

Jeni26

Hey Bruno, I remember you. I think we joined at about the same time. Good to see you back x

What have you tried so far? If you can't get to meetings, how about on-line ones? One of the biggest supports for me by far was joining a monthly support group. Actually I have 2 as I relapsed after a couple of months...so I get to post in March AND May 2012. I honestly believe those guys saved my life. I've posted some desperate stuff in my time and had only love and support all the way. How about joining the September class? I've popped in to say hi and they are a truly awesome group. All heading in the same direction, but giving each other a helping hand along the way.

Have you looked into AVRT at all? There's something to suit everyone, and I'm sure you are no exception.

It's good to see you back and posting. Stay with us xx

heath480

Sorry you are struggling Bruno,I remember you on here last year.

I don't know why you think you can't go to AA meetings,there are people there from every walk of life,teachers,policemen,nurses doctors,the list goes on.

I am in Staffordshire as well.there are loads of meetings.

doggonecarl

I'm not sure how we can help. We certainly can't make you get sober, or not drink, or take any action that will lead to your recovery. We can offer advice, but it would probably just be a rehash of what has already been suggested and I'm not seeing where advice is helping you either.

The best advice might have been your own, in the post that started this thread:

I agree. Something different because what you are doing now, isn't working, the hurdles you are putting in place to avoid AA, not working. And from what I can tell, the drinking isn't working either. You are at a real tipping point Bruno. Good luck.

longbeachone

Hi Bruno, Don't give up. There is hope for you.

Recovery is like a freeway (or whatever you call them in the UK), and Sobriety the destination. Some drivers get on, steer straight and travel uninterrupted to the exit. Some drivers take more time, drive more slowly. Some get off and on at every exit. Some get lost altogether, and go miles out of their way before making it back to the right road.

The trick is to keep going, keep driving, keep heading to sobriety. Eventually, you will get there. It's a lot easier to travel non-stop, but you do what you can. To take this parable a step further, you can see SR as your gas station along the way, there to fill up your tank with the spiritual fuel you need to continue your journey.

Hope this isn't too corny for you (do you even have that expression in the UK?). I just want you to know that there is hope for you, so keep your foot on the gas pedal and keep driving. Eventually, you'll get there.

flutter

Maybe consider some 1:1 counseling? That's the road I took, I couldn't do it long term on my own. What would be helpful to you here?

Bruno1979

Thanks very much for your replies,

I seem to be able to come on here every couple weeks and keep my mind in gear but then I'll meet up with my mates in the pub and everything goes to pot. I honestly do think that I can quit, I've strung together 100+ days in the past but now I've totally lost myself and even getting into double figures is a good result for me.

What I'm going have to do is keep coming on here and posting on this section of the forum because this seems to be the only way I can get the lift to motivate myself to continue with my sober life.

I'm sorry if I bore you to death with pointless threads over the next few months and thanks very much for listening.

Bruno.

doggonecarl

It's probably more complicated that that, but here is a thought. Try this: DON'T MEET UP WITH YOUR MATES AT THE PUB!

Your choice--drinking chums or sobriety.

AlefVavResh

Carl - That's what I was thinking

Bruno - post as many threads as you want. Everyone here will read and cheer you on. I'm thinking you might be avoiding AA because you are known in your community. So one thought is to just go somewhere further away. Otherwise, take advantage of the on-line "meetings". I'm just thinking it might be nice for you to meet some people who are not like your drinking buddies, people who you can really identify with. Maybe you'll find someone at SR who lives nearby and you can get together.

Best of luck. Keep reading and posting. You'll make it.

hypochondriac

Hey Bruno. Nice to see you again.

I have to agree with everything Dogonecarl has said so far. Also try to avoid thinking that your problem or situation is different from other peoples. We all had the hurdles of walking in an AA/SMART meeting and what to do about meeting mates in the pub. For the record the answers are... just do it, and don't go

I too started of with an 'I can't' attitude... I couldn't go to detox or to AA cos I have a public job, so I didn't for a bit. Y'know what, Stoke is a bigger city than you think and I couldn't even play 7 degrees of separation in the meetings I went to. Didn't know one of them. Now I love it if I bump into an AA in the street They are my allies even though I don't go to meetings anymore. The thing about the 'I can't' approach is that sooner or later you're gonna have to do something. If you are sick you go to the doctor right? Why is this any different. It doesn't get easier the longer you leave it. I waited til a medical professional told me I had to quit drinking... it was no longer a debate I could ponder over and it still took me over a year to quit since then. Embarrassing really, but that is how strong the grip can be. There is no harm in getting a little help to make it easier x

I'd suggest writing a list, of all the methods of quitting you can use, all the support groups you can go to for help and start working through it til something sticks. Personally I found this is far more complex than just avoiding your drinking buddies. But that's me. Just be honest with yourself and make sure you get the support you need.

If you need advice phone Aquarius 01782 283113. They can offer you one to one support and they may have SMART meetings running. Or get some books from the list in the stickies and start reading, find what will work for you.