MTSlideAddict

It’s been nearly a month since I left my comfortable home. I left behind my cats, my large king size bedroom set, my TV’s, my computers, and as of right now I am much happier. Despite not having my everyday comforts I feel at peace with my decision. Sure I live with my brother, his wife, a new born, and their three dogs along with my own, but I don’t get knots in my stomach on the way home from work anymore. I know I have made a good decision. It is tough sometimes without having the things I’m used to or having to work around someone else’s schedule, but my dog and I are getting used to having peace without an unpredictable alcoholic depressing the home.

Each week I try to get something done with the ultimate goal of separating from my AH. So far I got a PO box, changed passwords into accounts, switched over direct deposit from the joint account to the single, cashed in PTO from work to save for a place, ordered checks/debit card for the single account, looked and found a nearly affordable apartment, budged for dream apartment, researched the cost of furniture to fill it up, applied for new jobs, and went on an interview. Next week I’m going to take myself off the joint phone account and open a separate cell phone account. I would also like to put a deposit down on the apartment, but that depends on whether or not I got the job I went on the interview for. I should hear back on Monday. It’s one step at a time.

I do talk to AH. I see him quite regularly too. I have told him several times that I am moving forward in a separation. I told him I want an apartment. I feel so strong in my decision that even his promises and begging have not detoured me. I asked him if it would be easier for him if we didn’t talk or see each other, and he said no. I feel the same for me right now. I like talking to him as a friend, but I do feel that somewhere down the line we shouldn’t talk as often or at all. I think that will hold us both back from moving on in the long run. For now, however, I enjoy his friendship. Baby steps, baby steps.

Oh, "How Al-Anon Works for Families and Friends" is now in audio format!! I just purchased the audiobook from Audible.com. I love that they use real members to narrate the book.

fourmaggie

"claps" damn girl!! i am so proud of you....~huggles~

yes..everything takes time...and take time out for you...enjoy that Tea or that walk...and at the end of the day...kiss your brother for me and whisper "thank you" to him for me...

Tuffgirl

Yes, it is. But you seem to be finding that each step gets easier, right? That the first initial step was actually the hardest.

And good for you for continuing a relationship with him. I did the same for 18 months after I loved out. And I am glad I did, because it allowed me to be far more objective about it all when I wasn't living with it every day.

Keep on keepin on!
~T