nytepassion

Hello SR friends and family.

I felt an update was over due on my mama.

I was able to fly to Alabama and visit with my mom for a few days.
She is currently in a rehab/nursing home. She was glad I could come and so was I.

It had been a little over 20 years since I last saw my mom due to the fact that she moved to Alabama and I am not a flyer. I have always been afraid to fly since I was a little girl and heard my mama say she had a fear of flying.

Well I flew out to see her and there was nothing to fear as my flight there was pleasant. I realized that the only thing my fear had done was rob me of seeing my mom prior to her falling and fracturing her hip.

The visit went as best as can be expected though I was hoping for more. I was hoping to have long heart filled conversations with mama, but she did the best she could and gave all she had. I couldn't ask for anymore then that.

Initially the hope was that my mama would recover from her fall, but they found that she has congestive heart failure and her kidneys are shutting down on her. They just aren't working right and everything they have done has done nothing to change that.

She has little to no appetite doesn't really want to drink fluids, has nausea and vomiting. She told me her body was worn out.

Today my brother is setting her up with hospice. There will be no aggressive treatment to try to change what is happening. No feeding tubes, No resuscitation. Her needs will be met and she will be made comfortable until the Lord takes her home.

I cherish the time I was able to spend with my mom. It was absolutely priceless. I got to hold her hand and tell her I love her and kiss her forehead. I would run my fingers through her hair and she would fall fast asleep. It brought me comfort to know I could lull her and that my touch felt good to her.

I don't know how long mama has left and if I could stop the process from happening I would, but it is not up to me so I yield my wants and wishes and hopes over to God and trust that He knows what He is doing and can handle everything just fine without my 2 cents.

Mama is bound for Glory and I know she will be so happy to see Jesus face to face. How can I wish her to stay and be miserable when she could go and be happy. I can't and I will not be selfish. So today I accept the fact that mama is going to be leaving this earth and I release her to God's care. I will miss her deeply, but I know I will see her again someday.

I have been very blessed to have the kind of mom I do and there is none like her to me. I have always said that Jesus is the King and my mom is the queen. Long live the queen.

I love you mama

Ann

I am so glad you made the trip, Passion, and how blessed your mama is to have such love in her final days. This time you had together will help you find peace when she goes. I think she will die happier for knowing you were there.

I will keep her in my prayers, that when the time comes she slips gently into the arms of God.

Hugs to you for overcoming your fear to do this. To no longer fear flying is a legacy your mama gave you, one of those strangely wrapped gifts.

Hugs

neferkamichael

Nytepassion, you are FANTASTIC.

suki44883

Those of us who had loving mamas are truly blessed. I am so glad to know that you were able to visit with her. No matter how long she has left on this mortal coil, it is a sure thing that you were both blessed by your visit with her.

((((HUGS)))) to you and your mama.

Impurrfect

Nyte- so glad you got to spend quality time with your mama. Pretty cool that you learned it's not so bad to fly when you wanted to see her. I agree with Ann - one of those strangely wrapped gifts.

Hugs and prayers to you and your mama,

Amy

Vale

NP,
Your Mom is so blessed to have you as a daughter.
I think both of you truly treasured the time spent
together. When the time comes for the Lord to embrace
and welcome her......you can be sure the both of them
will treasure & appreciate your visit.
( just look at that smile on her face!)
It's not how much time we have in this world---it's
what we do with it.
God bless both you and your Mom.

nytepassion

She was so tired and in so much pain from a pressure sore on her tail bone. She was only able to handle sitting for 10 minutes, but even in pain she still had a smile for me. I could tell she was glad to see me, but I could also tell she was being so strong for me. She gave me all her best while I was there and it took all she had to do it. I tried not to seem too needy, but I soaked up all of her that I could. Every word she spoke was so important to me. Every look, every move.

The day I had to leave I told her it was time for me to go and she kissed me goodbye. I had to stop and steal one more kiss before I left as I had not felt my mama kiss or touch in years and I realized I truly had been missing out. I love her with all my heart and I will miss her with all my being.

sevenofnine

Thanks for sharing. I wish I had amazing things to say, like you and the others, but I'm coming up short. So just thank you for sharing- you made me feel less alone today, and please know that others out there care about your struggles today too.

Your mom is beautiful, and obviously has the spirit to grab as much as possible even now, which is so admirable.

I'm so sorry for your pain and wish you both strength.