thedude704

I'm 31 in November and I've been drinking since I was 18. When I was 18 I started drinking like 3 twelve packs a week. Currently I drink about 5 sometimes 6 twelve packs a week.

(I wish this site didn't lose my last post because it was like 3 pages... this one will be abridged, feel free to have me elaborate on anything you want)

A number of factors contribute to my drinking past the physical addiction. Loneliness, depression, the usual suspects. (geez I poured my heart out here last post....)

I want to better myself, I want to save money, I want to get healthy, I want to get in shape, i want to improve my relationships, I want to stop drinking.

I'm a functional drinker, never late to work, always there, extra shifts etc. It's everything else that suffers.

I don't do **** around the house, I need to paint and things like that, I could keep better care of myself if I didn't drink. I have fatty liver. I work 1430-2300 so basically when I get off work there's nothing to do so I load up Xbox and grab some beers since its really the only social interaction I get. All my friends here have other **** to do (and no it's not because of the alcohol, but that's another story.)

I want to start working out and if I come home and drink i basically just come home drink and sleep till work. There's a lot of things I want to do that I'm either not motivated to do or I just sleep too much (I'm sure some of that is the depression) so I'm working to improve this.

I'm here for some conversations from others in similar situations. I'm concerned with withdrawls and detox as most of us here have been at one point. I've seen some scary symptoms and I've checked them to myself and I get mixed feelings. For example: I've heard of people that drink like I do that they can start seeing symptoms within 2 hours of not having a drink. I don't have this happen, I've gone two days with nothing (except for irritability which I only just learned was being caused by alcohol.) Specifically I don't get shakes which I've read can happen pretty quick. I guess I might mention though too that It takes me like 6 hours to drink a 12 pack so its a pretty slow paced situation and I almost never get "drunk" like not blackouts or things like that. I don't know if that matters or not. Anyway like I said, I have good insurance and I can get the help I need, that's not a problem.

I'm here for some stories and some advice and just anything anyone wants to talk to me about.

In advance I appreciate anyone's' time reading this and furthermore anyone that posts I appreciate just as much.

Thanks

Matt

Dee74

Hi and welcome thedude

be sure and tick the 'remember me' box when you log in or yeah it's possible sometimes to get logged out

Failing that just write up your post on wordpad or something and copy and paste

As far as what do? I think supports important. Making lifestyle changes is too - if your current life is sitting around and drinking then change that routine - don't sit around, don;t get bored, and find some support and really work it.

I always recommend seeing a Dr too, even if you think you'll be fine. The thing is detox can be tricky and none of us knows ahead of time what may or may not happen. I think it's best to play it safe, myself.

D

Newatthis34

Hi Matt,

Welcome to SR! Bummer about losing your longer message but I think we can get the gist of your story from what you wrote.

I'm like you - no major dramas or disaster stories to fuel my desire for sobriety. Simply the wish to achieve something more satisfying in my life than guzzling bottles of wine on a nightly basis. I've learned that although there are many routes to this point of wishing to quit, the solution for all of us is the same. Good luck!

coraltint

Welcome, Matt! Lots of people helping each other stay sober & get healthier here.

The thing that sounded familiar to me in your post was the isolation. Booze & drugs ended up cutting me off from people who cared about me and basic human interaction. That's not the way life is meant to be lived.

So, welcome to a community. We can be your practice field for getting back in the human race.

thedude704

Thank you both for your replies, I do believe I need to change my routine because it is a perpetual cycle of basically boredom and loneliness with no support. Although I don't know how much support I can get at 2300 :P mayhaps If I can get a daytime schedule of boredom I can find a productive outlet such as the gym or something. I'm embarrassed to say I'm writing this as I'm drinking but tonight was one of the nights where I've been thinking.... and when I think I have good ideas.... its just waking up to them and following through. The thought of seizures and **** like that terrify me.

hypochondriac

Welcome to SR Dude

Your post is very reminiscent of my own drinking habits, and don't worry, I filled in the gaps with the emotional outpouring, been there before so I know how it feels. I found that getting sober was a very emotional thing for me, which is normal because we use alcohol to suppress emotions and when we stop drinking they tend to come to the surface. I was also a 'functional' alcoholic. I never allowed myself to be late or miss work but the rest of my life was a mess. My home is a right state, and the state of my friendships is pretty poor too. I found I had to concentrate on just getting sober and working on the depression first though. That's enough for me for now.

I'd recommend just going to see a doc about detox. There are so many factors to consider and it is best to be on the safe side.

Glad you are here x

thedude704

Also on the work and insurance deal, I work at a hospital so I'm pretty damn certain if I went to the EAP (employee assistance program) and my Dr (who is also within our hospital network) I can get this going. And I am pretty sure I could have family financial support for the bills I would need to pay while in rehab. It's just a matter of sucking it up and admitting it to everyone and hoping they all accept me for me. feeling anxious

wiscsober

thedude704

ty wiscsober

Dee74

This is an international site so there's always someone here for support - even at 2300...and beyond

D

thedude704

I don't suppose any of you are football fans? I love football and that's just another thing I associate drinking with. How do you guys deal with that sort of thing?

pinkdog

Hi Matt, welcome. I'm sober over 3 years. I said the exact same things early on. You can google symptoms of alcohol withdrawal. It lists how many hours you might expect each symptom. Some people can simply quit with mild withdrawals. I couldn't so I tapered down for 30 days first. Or you can get medical help. People choose different methods. It worked for me. You will find understanding and support here.

mandymarie22

I know i am a very new member and i know i havent said my story yet, but i wanted to reply and say that once you come and tell your family and close ones about your illness, there is a weight lifted off your shoulders. No more secrets.

thedude704

pink, I had just spent about an hour looking up withdrawn timelines and detox timelines, it all seemed really extreme based on my experiences and that's what concerned me. I thought surely this many people can't be wrong. But I don't want to sound cliché but I honestly don't think I have a terribly addictive personality. Now I say that as I'm an alcoholic but that was many years in the making and a long story behind it. But for example I also take Adderall and that is (as far as I know one of the most addicting things like cocaine) and I can take it foe a few months or a few days or a few weeks. Honestly I take it as needed and have no withdrawal symptoms. I honestly feel *and I've never had to come off alcohol* that I may have a chance at this.

thedude704

ty mandy, I brushed the subject with my gf once and I cried a lot, and then just got worse and she still thinks I don't drink. I almost fell out about a year ago when she told my grandmother that she was "the one that got me to stop drinking every day"

BLAH

mandymarie22

Also, i am only 8 days sober and the first night was awful. Sweats, cold, hot, shivers, mind goes a mile a minute, seeing things. But the next night is easier. You wake up feeling a bit more "awake". I remember the other day i noticed that my bags were gone beneath my eyes. The last two nites i have slept peacefully. Its worth a few rough nites.

I MISSED SOBER SLEEP

Sulu1

Welcome to SR Matt. Tons of support here at all times of the day/night

thedude704

man that's really helpful, i never sleep, and I sweat A LOT as well as mind racing. I also have terrible bags under my eyes. I'm hopeful. !!

mandymarie22

Are you sure she doesnt at least suspect it a little bit? My boyfriend always knew i drank but it wasnt until this past year that he realized how bad it was

hayley86

Welcome Matt, I quit drinking 11 months ago for my health and to basically take back control of my life. I had reached a point were drinking had took over every aspect of my life. I can relate to many things that you have said in your post including the contributing factors (feeling isolated and depressed). Now i am sober negative thoughts and anxieties have pretty much gone for me and i am much better equipped to cope with any difficult situations. I made sure i had a set routine when i was first getting sober and kept myself as busy as possible. I found speaking to my doctor was a great step. I also think as much support as you can get really helps. Wishing you well.