patricia68

I am having a bad day...I am so frustrated!

Every single time I try to quit drinking something bad happens!

My husband was working the night shift last night...and got hurt. He dislocated his shoulder and ended up in the ER. He is fine now, just very sore...but I am just about to freak out...the cravings, the anxiety, ugh they are just killing me!

Taking deep breaths...I hope this gets better soon

Patricia

hypochondriac

Sorry you are having a bad day Patricia, and I hope your husband feels better soon.

It gets easier, really it does. It can seem like everything is going **** up when we first get sober but that is just the addiction. These are the things we used as excuses to drink so it is understandable that they will trigger us. But it is just that, an excuse. I don't want to diminish the stressfulness of your day but I bet you would have had a similar response if you couldn't find matching socks this morning I went through a few stressful events sober but I feel like because I had taken the option of drinking completely of the table I was able to cope better. Now I find the idea of having to drink through an event like that positively terrifying. Drinking never resolves anything and the need to drink gets in the way of fixing anything.

Slammy1

Try and imagine how a healthy person would deal with it, I think your addict voice is messing with your head a bit if you feel that's a valid reason to drink. I would say the opposite, clear head to support the husband.

Marcella99

Patricia , hang in there! You've got unlimited support here. More bad things will result from drinking, not from quitting- the first few weeks are hard and things seem unmanageable- but every day will get better. Hang in there

patricia68

You are right, things won't get any better if I drink. Still taking deep breaths to try and calm down. Thank you so much for your help!

patricia68

You are right...I'm thinking of my dad...he wouldn't be drinking...my husband is in pain and he's not drinking...you are right. Thank you so much.

misspond

Being clear headed and able to help your husband is the best way to be. You can do this Patricia68 and we're all here with you x

longbeachone

In my second year of sobriety My husband became critically ill and spent eight months in the hospital, much of it in the ICU, and had only a slim chance of survival. I slept in his hospital room most nights. When he had finally recovered, he told me that if I had not been there for him, he would not have made it. I stayed sober the whole time. It wasn't about me, although I was affected. It was completely about him. I didn't fall apart because "I" couldn't handle it.

This took time, it didn't happen until I'd been sober for awhile. You've learned a good lesson here. Put the focus where it should be, on your husband. This isn't an excuse for you to drink. Once we fall into that trap, everything becomes a reason to drink.

Sasha4

I am going through a big crisis at the moment.
I have not drunk for 18 months.

In the past a crisis would just have been a green light to pour huge amounts of booze down my neck and throw the huge pity party I thought I deserved.

But doing that never helped the situation.
I was too hungover to deal with the situation.
I was extra anxious and on edge as I had nerves from the crisis but alcohol just increased my paranoia.

Sober is the way forward.
Drunk is not.

You can do this and you can handle it in a way that makes you proud of yourself and your husband too!

Wishing you the best xx

Dee74

I am glad your husband is OK and that you did not drink Patricia

D

Emily2002

Love the responses in this thread. So glad he's fine now, and you're here!

patricia68

Thank you so much everybody! I am still sober!

I didn't run to the store to get wine...I had a cup of tea instead and asked my husband if he wanted to watch some music videos on Youtube together. We had a nice relaxing time

I am still dealing with anxiety but mostly about my husband...the urge to drink is gone. I am going to finish this evening with a long hot shower and probably go to bed early with a book.

Thank you so much for helping me!

Patricia

Anna

Patricia, I'm glad your husband is safe at home and healing.

And, life has its ups and downs and getting through today is going to help you the next time something comes along.

Fandy

congrats on making a good decision....it was tough and you worked through it with sensible logic..post here and talk it out when you get urges.
welcome to SR!

Eleni58

Patricia, Today I broke up with my boyfriend and I didn't cry but yesterday when Fed Ex called to say they were unable to deliver my new Iphone5 because of a bad/incorrect address and I would have to drive an hour to pick it up, I burst into tears. I was like "whoa! Where did that come from?" 44 days sober and it was first time I cried. Early sobriety will bring a gamut of emotions that we are forced to face for the first time sober. Hang in there!

neferkamichael

Patricia, of course I am glad your husband is okay, but there is no correlation between him getting hurt and you quitting drinking. However, that doesn't stop you from being worried and upset and that causes you to want to drink. That would help with the anxiety for a bit, but things would be worse in the long run. Patricia, rootin for ya.

Marcella99

Neferka, that flower is beautiful

rungsat69

Hi Patricia, Like they say NOTHING IS SO BAD THAT A DRINK WONT MAKE IT WORSE. I hope your husband is doing okay. Dislocating a shoulder can be very painful. He went to the ER they took care of him right? I am a lot like you when something like that happens to me I freak out to. I am kind of what they call a Alarmist. Anything that goes wrong is the end of the world for me. I always think the worst when something happens. Time maybe to chill out take a deep breathe and hang on to your sobriety. This to Shall pass. i Think your husband will be fine. I also get a lot of Anxiety When something like that happens Try to hang in there the best you can. I think you will be fine



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doggonecarl

I don't think the quitting and bad things happening are cause and effect. I think everytime something bad happens, you feel like drinking.