diha

I grew up in a large family. My dad was an alcoholic. Several siblings have had drug addictions/anxiety/alcoholism. When I was younger (started at 10 maybe) I cleaned like crazy. I was cleaning bathroom floors with a toothbrush. We had no supervision at all. I was selling acid at 12 and away from home for several days at a time (doing lots of drugs at raves) and never questioned.*I am currently a single mother of 2. I was diagnosed with ocd a few years ago. After my second child I went through some custody and harassment issues and started drinking a lot.*I have trIed antidepressants with no luck. I stupid taking them and tried meds for alcoholIsm (antabuse, naltrexone, campral) with no improvement.*I think that I drink because of habit and anxiety. I do not think that I have ocd. I still like things clean, not toothbrush to floor clean though. I cannot relax until everything is fine. I cannot concentrate on anything at work. I spend a lot of time trying to organize my home life (appointments, classes, meal plans, financial stuff). I never follow through on anything. MY BRAIN NEVER STOPS!!! I cannot relax. There is always something to do and I will never be able to relax until it is all done. So... I drink. It makes me stop thinking. It shuts up my brain, my thoughts, my to do list.*I guess my question is... does any of this sounds familiar to anyone? I cannot stop drinking and I think it is because I cannot shut up my head. I want to go to a psychiatrist and tell them all of this but am I completely off??Are there any meds that with addiction and adhd??? If that's what I even have

Dee74

I don't have OCD or ADD but my brain would never shut up either - a million thoughts a minute is a good way of describing it.

Drink would often shut it up and relax me - but my solution was creating a lot of other problems...both mental physical and in my relationship with others...

in short my solution was killing me.

So I stopped drinking and I learned to live with my million miles an hour brain...I quite like it now

I found that although I learned to drink to deal with my thoughts, my thoughts did not cause my alcoholism - my alcoholism existed of its own accord.

I had to deal with it, and find other ways to deal with the chatter in my head as well.

If you think you have ADD or anything else diha - get some help. Speak with a professional.

Drinking is not an optimal solution, or a long term one.

D

diha

Thanks Dee. I do think that the thoughts are causing my drinking. I get so stressed over the house not being clean and cannot stop going until everything is done. This will never happen. I cant live until I can learn to relax once in a while. It seems to cascade from the anxiety.

TexasMichael

I drank for years to help with social anxiety, fear and depression.

The few times I tried any other drugs I was so afraid of addiction that I stopped.

My parents were so relieved I was "only drinking" and not doing drugs.

Never stayed sober long enough to realize alcohol was CAUSING much of the fear and anxiety.

After several months of sobriety the fears are just beginning to subside.

It has taken that long to realize ALCOHOL was the MAIN cause of my negative feelings.

For me any other drug would just delay my recovery.

diha

Great advice. I have tried for years to stop and just cannot. Maybe its an excuse but maybe its the reason I use alcohol. I feel like I have to give it a shot because it is a possibility.

EndGameNYC

Yeah, speak to a trained professional.

You're stuck in an infinite loop of punishment > no reward > alcohol > punishment > no reward > alcohol...