conga

I did quit for a month last year and felt great but fell off the wagon. After a summer of 10 plus beers a night I am on day 2 again. I have been able to sleep better this time around and seem to have the munchies like crazy, I hope that wears off because gaining weight is part of my reason to lay off the beers. That and money and sanity, pretty good reasons I figure. I went off to my boat last night (Vancouver Island BC) and had a peaceful night to myself. I am going to cook a nice chicken curry tonight, walk the dogs and try to find a good movie.

Although my so encourages me on my sober path it also seems to make her insecure as she still drinks (which does not bother me at all) . I think she believes I will sober up and leave her, which is not the case. I am doing this for the reasons I have stated above. I think she feels guilty (not the right word) and takes it out on me a little. My first night of sobriety I was laying in bed reading much earlier than normal. My so came into the room ( a little tipsy) and started baby taking to our dogs, I was not feeling that great to begin with and I was annoyed with the baby talk. She then looked at me and said " You hate my guts" which is so not true. I was just not in the mood at the moment which I think is normal it being my first night off the drink. Anyway I don't want to tell secrets or put her down but it made it really hard not to go out and get some beer after that. I feel like I am ramble ling so I will stop now. I will write something tomorrow, good luck everyone and have a nice evening.

Anna

I'm glad you're back.

It doesn't sound like you're being disrespectful to your SO, merely that you're a bit stressed. I think most of us in relationships, have had some ups and downs in the early days of recovery. Things that wouldn't normally bother us can become quite annoying.

not2late

You are not disrespectful at all. Your so will probably come around when you have a new "norm".

least

I'd just keep your side of the street clean and hope that her insecurities will pass.

conga

Thanks for the reply's folks. You know I never really thought about how difficult it must be for my so. I was only thinking about me and how hard it is what I am doing. Thanks for that insite Anna. Here we are on day 4 (last drink Aug 25). Feeling alright but not that clear of mind yet. I seem to have a fever and my blood pressure is up but I know that will go away. Had another argument last night with my so over her sons temper when gaming ( he freaks out and makes me nervous) oh well I cannot ask the world to change just because I am. Take care all and have a good day.

Dee74

welcome back Conga

Early recovery is a time of upheaval and change for not only us but our partners too. We change change others but we can definitely change how we react to them.

I'd give her some latitude and understanding and focus on yourself and your recovery as a priority for now.

Do you have a plan for staying sober?

D

conga

Hi Dee, love your picture! No big plan, just not to drink, i have done it before with success for a month at a time. Then I just convince myself I can handle weekends only and then bingo back to every night. For me money is a big motivator. I also work as a social worker in downtown Victoria BC so seeing the negative effects of alcohol and drugs helps keep me straight. I feel a little bad because I had to cancel a band practice this evening and could not tell my band mates why. I think I need to learn to open up about this and not try and do it alone. Thanks for the reply Dee, have a good day.

conga

Another night on my boat last night, it was very rainy which has not happened in a long time, its been a very hot dry summer. We folks on the coast deserved it!! I had a little fire in my wood stove and watch a good movie on my laptop.

I had a hard time sleeping for the first time last night and woke up very tired but made it to work on time. Anyway day 5, have a nice long weekend everyone. It's the labor day weekend up here in Canada eh!