ZoeM

Non-stop (bleeping) cravings! Thankfully they're leaving me alone now and I'm thrilled to have come out the other side.
Phew!

EndGameNYC

I hate when that happens. I hate it even more when I drink.

ZoeM

Yes, it was the thought of tomorrow and the next days and having to go back to day1.
Really annoying as I'm sooo determined not to drink again.
At least I now know that I can get through them - in the past, I've always given in at this point x

hayley86

Well done on not giving in Zoe. You are so much stronger than you realize!. Keep focused on your aim of long term sobriety. The cravings will get less with time. Great that you are posting here and are so determined. I hope you have a peaceful night!.

Hevyn

Proud of you Zoe. Been there many times and it's rough - but we can rise above it. Eventually it does settle down and get easier.

SereneEdition

Great job on making different choices. Keep it up!

Linnie

Do you feel so proud of yourself that you made it through?!?!? I had a rough one last week and I felt like Hercules after I rode that craving out. I can't remember who it was but a user posted on someone's thread that he was competitive and he felt like every day he resisted the urge to drink he felt like he won a competition with his addiction, and it really does feel like that sometimes. I rode the craving out until the bars and shops closed and then I was like "Boo-yah!!!!" to my AV. Victory!

ZoeM

Thanks guys xxxx I tend to go quiet when things are bugging me, but I've been reading and reading the forum all day and it has been a lifeline - thanks so much xxx

EndGameNYC

It's great that you're here.

A lot of folks seem to just disappear, not returning for from any time between one day to a few years. Not a criticism; it's what we know.

When I was getting cravings following my relapse, my first instinct was keep it to myself and keep it on the DL. I learned the hard way that doing this was doing it the hard way.

ZoeM

I will learn to open up more - I'm just naturally a private person, but I genuinely am determined this time. I messed about for 4 years with half-heartedly giving up but not any more. Today has taught me I really CAN do this xx

JumpnOn2

Not easy... but worth it!!! I'll be going to a "wild game " cookout and there will probably be some of the best creek liquor, apple pie (think Russian tea with creek liquor added), beer etc but I'll be sticking with pink lemonade . Good job Z!!!

ZoeM

Thanks xxxx Have a lovely time at the cookout. Not really sure what one is, but it sounds fun

DrunkenBob

I LOVE that.

Think of it like a competitive game. I know I prefer winning!!!

pinkdog

Good job Zoe, keep going. They will happen less often as you go along. Bravo!

Sasha4

I am the same Zoe.
I usually go quiet. Sometimes I go for a drive on the motorway to calm down, get away from it all.

I used, to, in the dark days, come home, sink 4 massive vodka's before I even opened my mouth to say what was wrong.

I don't often post asking for help here either that much.
I tend to post on other peoples threads.

Last week, when I thought my world had come to an end, I did post.
It straight away made me feel a little bit better. I suppose that must be getting things off my chest.

However, when I woke up the next morning, and I saw all the replies, I think there were about 17, I cried. I was so blown away that my family here cared so much about me.

I am so glad you are here Zoe.
You will find this place thousands of times better than any other place on the internet.
If you ever want to try AA, I will come with you, if you give me enough notice and I truly, truly mean that.

Your part of our family now and we will look after you, wipe tears away, give you a shoulder to cry on, pick you up and put you back together again.

I remember when I got my year without a drink.
The thing I looked forward to most of all, was coming here and thanking everyone for helping me do it and the posts I got, saying how proud people here were of me, I will never, ever forget.

I promise you as well that as time goes on, your cravings will get less and less.
I am about 542 days without a drink.

Probably after about 4 months, I could never imagine drinking during the day at weekends

It took a bit longer for the night time cravings but I think it was around 8 months.

You are doing great honey.

I, like Endgame, are glad you stayed with us too.

We often get posters who post after a bad bender or night of drinking, when they are deep into their hangovers and then they never return.
Its annoying, but understandable, when you type a reply and you never even get to know if they read it.

One thing that I used to do, I learnt it from Dee, is to 'play the tape through to the end'.

I would think, will it be just one drink? Probably not.

If I buy a bottle will I drink it all? Probably.

Will I stop at one bottle? Probably not.

Will I feel better tomorrow? No I will be ill, paranoid and hate myself.

Will it solve my problems? No it will probably create more.

Will it take my mind off things? No because if I have one drink, I will be trapped at home, unable to drive or go anywhere or do anything.

Have you practised playing the tape all the way through?

I get homesick when I don't come here every couple of hours!!

I wish you the best.

ZoeM

Thanks Pinkdog xxx

ZoeM

Thanks Sasha - think we cross posted there. I remembered that thing about 'playing the tape through to the end' but couldn't remember who had said it. Didn't realise it was Dee, bless him.

Thanks also for offering to come to AA - I have been in the past a few times and am thinking of going to a womens group on a Saturday, but in all honesty, I didn't really feel it was for me. I honestly don't mean that to sound insulting to AA or anything and I really will consider it again

I'm SO touched by all these replies - means the world to me right now - thanks again SO much everyone xxxxx

ReadyAtLast

Every time this happens and you don't drink you'll feel so much stronger until one day NOT drinking is your natual default position. congrats on getting through it

ZoeM

Thank you I'm going to go have a relaxing bubble bath, but I'll be back in about 20mins xxxx

ACOAHappyNow

You did great!