There IS Hope
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 12
There IS Hope
A little over two years ago I joined this online forum out of fear of the unknown. I didn't know what to do with the new boyfriend that was an alcoholic struggling to get sober. I had known him for many years before he became the new boyfriend, so I guess my situation is different from some others.
I heard the same story on here...the "run while I can," "you dodged a bullet," and the "you are still young enough to move on." And I appreciated those, but I was getting that in real life too. And for some reason it just didn't feel right. And don't get me wrong, many times I told myself, yup - just leave, that's the easy way out.
But instead I prayed. I prayed and prayed and prayed. And I told him goodbye. Even though he was in recovery and working on himself. I told him I'll just be his friend. And I will support him in recovery, but nothing more. And I did. And he went through a year of faith-based treatment. And I was at the finish line. And he asked me to be his all over again, and I am now his. And he is mine. And we will be each other's legally in one year.
And I know many of you have felt this way, but the voice inside was saying "run." Then run. The voice inside me was saying "have faith." Listen to your gut.
Now, I know this is a site for the broken. The lost, as well as the found. I understand. But please keep in mind that before you go about giving advice (which you aren't technically supposed to do), maybe offer faith for the fallen. Offer hope for the lost. Share your experiences (negative or positive) but offer support.
NO relationship is easy. A relationship with an alcoholic is exponentially harder. BUT it is NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. Now, I was fortunate to have my alcoholic WANT to better himself. Noone forced him into recovery, noone forced him to stay sober after. You may agree, that makes a huge difference. I was not trying to make him sober. He was trying.
And does relapse happen? It may. But here is something you may not know - YOU SURVIVE. You survive, and the world does not end, and you may feel defeated momentarily but life goes on, and recovery starts over, and THERE IS HOPE.
Love God, Love Others, Love Yourself, PERIOD.
I heard the same story on here...the "run while I can," "you dodged a bullet," and the "you are still young enough to move on." And I appreciated those, but I was getting that in real life too. And for some reason it just didn't feel right. And don't get me wrong, many times I told myself, yup - just leave, that's the easy way out.
But instead I prayed. I prayed and prayed and prayed. And I told him goodbye. Even though he was in recovery and working on himself. I told him I'll just be his friend. And I will support him in recovery, but nothing more. And I did. And he went through a year of faith-based treatment. And I was at the finish line. And he asked me to be his all over again, and I am now his. And he is mine. And we will be each other's legally in one year.
And I know many of you have felt this way, but the voice inside was saying "run." Then run. The voice inside me was saying "have faith." Listen to your gut.
Now, I know this is a site for the broken. The lost, as well as the found. I understand. But please keep in mind that before you go about giving advice (which you aren't technically supposed to do), maybe offer faith for the fallen. Offer hope for the lost. Share your experiences (negative or positive) but offer support.
NO relationship is easy. A relationship with an alcoholic is exponentially harder. BUT it is NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. Now, I was fortunate to have my alcoholic WANT to better himself. Noone forced him into recovery, noone forced him to stay sober after. You may agree, that makes a huge difference. I was not trying to make him sober. He was trying.
And does relapse happen? It may. But here is something you may not know - YOU SURVIVE. You survive, and the world does not end, and you may feel defeated momentarily but life goes on, and recovery starts over, and THERE IS HOPE.
Love God, Love Others, Love Yourself, PERIOD.
Engineer Things; LOVE People
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
All good, and taken as such.
But keep in mind, that while you had an . . . .
A lot of folks here are dealing with A's struggling to stay drunk, or dry drunk.
Very different animal.
But keep in mind, that while you had an . . . .
Originally Posted by thegf 
. . . alcoholic struggling to get sober. . . .
Very different animal.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 12
Agreed!
"And I know many of you have felt this way, but the voice inside was saying "run." Then run. The voice inside me was saying "have faith." Listen to your gut.
Now, I know this is a site for the broken. The lost, as well as the found. I understand. But please keep in mind that before you go about giving advice (which you aren't technically supposed to do), maybe offer faith for the fallen. Offer hope for the lost. Share your experiences (negative or positive) but offer support."
"And I know many of you have felt this way, but the voice inside was saying "run." Then run. The voice inside me was saying "have faith." Listen to your gut.
Now, I know this is a site for the broken. The lost, as well as the found. I understand. But please keep in mind that before you go about giving advice (which you aren't technically supposed to do), maybe offer faith for the fallen. Offer hope for the lost. Share your experiences (negative or positive) but offer support."
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