Nuudawn

I had a craving come up outta nowhere earlier this evening and kind of startle the heck out of me. I've been feeling strong and centered and just darn happy to be sober and back feeling some semblance of control over my being. I had a long day at my office and didn't really get a chance to eat. I hadn't intended to stay so long but things sort of got away on me and I didn't get out until 7 p.m. I thought.."wow, a nice chilled glass of white wine would really hit the spot right now". And holy moly, didn't some justifications just start marching in! As in.."hey girl, you've gotten a pretty good handle on this thing. You've gotten some marvelous feedback from your therapist on just how remarkable you're doing. You only want one glass of wine. You know you only want one and then you'd be done with it. I really don't think you're an alcoholic after all".

WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. It appeared to me that this just whammed me right out of nowhere. Well...it's never right out of nowhere. I paused and assessed a few things.
I was starving for one. It had been a long stressful day...and H.A.L.T came to mind. I realized I didn't want to go home alone and fix myself dinner.d Soooo..I took myself out for dinner. I had a great book with me. And I had my favorite virgin strawberry margarita thing (most sophisticated, tastiest, lovliest slurpee ever)..and then I had dessert and coffee. Ahhhh...twas lovely.

I'm home now. Just wanted to share my experience. It has been so long since I had a craving...it damn never levelled me. But I paused...and thought. Whew. Hey..my alcohol damaged brain is repairing : )

neferkamichael

Nuudawn, you are FANTASTIC.

Linnie

Go girl! I had a heck of a day yesterday. I think I was bored, though. That HALT business is no joke! A lifesaver! Great job staying on track, I'm proud of you

Soberpotamus

Nuudawn, what an amazing success . So glad you worked your way through it. Your virgin margarita, dinner and a book, followed by coffee and dessert sounds lovely. Congrats!

Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery

Amajorityofone

Congratulations!

Correct me if I am mistaken, but according to my math you are approximately sixty days into your sobriety? I ask because I just went through my journal and at the sixty day mark I took a much needed vacation. Nothing extravagant, just rented a car, and drove down to Atlanta for the weekend.

I encourage you to do the same asap.

least

Good for you for beating back that craving!

ZoeM

Well done xx

ersatzmatriarch

way to go, nuu!!

LadyinBC

Way to go on getting thru it. I don't even have to have a bad day to want a drink either and I will get cravings out of the blue. No rhyme or reason to them, they just pop up!

Kys

Thanks for posting this. I've never been to AA but seek support in a one on one environment, and here of course. Anyway I just google H.A.L.T and it's a great tool to use.

Thank you.

Dee74

good for you Nuudawn

I always says it's not our thoughts that define us and our recovery, but the way we respond to those thoughts.

you played a blinder

D

quitforme79

It's amazing how our minds are so good at making excuses huh? I had a thought to drink yesterday "some white wine would really go well with my cleaning right now" what?! I use to be terrified when I would get a craving or thought. Once I started accepting them as a somewhat the norm (I am an alcoholic so I will think of drinking sometimes) it got easier to get through them. You're doing awesome, it's great you took yourself out to eat & read. I'm fining time & time are the true healers of my damaged way of thinking.

ando68

Great post nuudawn & well done. One chilled glass of wine eh,,, how deceiving the beast can be. A nice victory for you.

LadyBlue0527

Awesome post Nuudawn, and inspiring! None of us are removed from having cravings we just need to find a way to get past them. This CAN be done.

IOAA2

Hi Nuudawn and congratulations on your reaction to your drinking thought. H.A.L.T. took a long time to recognize because of my unique alcoholic haze. I thought that all happening at the same time was necessary!

RobbyRobot

How awesome are YOU?!!

Yeah, being in real-time with ourselves makes all the difference. You nailed this!! Well done!

lessgravity

Love it, Nuu. I had a similar experience last night, though I'm earlier in the sober game on this round than you. Was heading out to dinner at a really good local crab spot. Have felt strong and solid and so good about sobriety lately. The sun was setting, there was a cool breeze off the ocean and the thought of exactly that - a nice, chilled, over-filled () glass of white wine would so HIT the SPOT. I felt angry that I wasn't going to have one. So then I told myself I deserved it. Said how crummy it is that since I've quit drinking I can't enjoy one glass here and there.

But, like you, I rode out the urges (surfed them etc) and, like rays of sun passing over a field - they left me! I was waiting for dinner and was suddenly seized by the opposite feeling - one of strength, of calm, of peace - that I could enjoy this delicious dinner, drive home sober, eat some sorbet, maybe watch some Netflix, read as I fell asleep sober and wake up still strong and calm and confident.

Here's to you and me and all of us who get through these cravings/urges/wants/beastial callings.

Thanks for the post, as usual.

Leshar

Thanks for this post, Nuudawn. I've been struggling the last day or two and your post really helped me. I think you did exactly the right thing, going out for dinner.

Look after yourself, make time to have a snack, even if its just a yogurt, protein bar or something. Don't work too hard!

Sally3127

Great job Nudawn. I've had a couple extremely stressful weeks at work lately and especially on Fridays I had that thought of "wow a glass of wine sounds just perfect to top off a busy week." It didn't take long for me to jump back to reality but man, oh man, it just came out of nowhere.

Of course I immediately went to a meeting and shared my experience. I'm so glad my AV didn't get the better of me.

FourSeasons

Great post, NuuDawn! I too went out last night to meet my old college friends. This was a last minute get together. I got a call out of the blue that they were going to be in town. At first, I did not want to go. However, I really wanted to see them. I thought I could not be strong. But I was!

When I met them, they were already about 2-3 martinis in. I ordered club soda and cranberry in a high ball glass. Now one was the wiser. I really enjoyed my time in seeing them. However, one friend kind of got super buzzed... a bit sloppy even. I never noticed her sloppiness before but then again I have never been sober around her!

I felt good this morning!!

Thanks for posting!!